While I have only had one lover use a vibrator on me I can say it was amazing and I cant wait to do it again !
While I cant answer for every woman I am going to try to explain what constitutes a good lover .
Someone that takes pleasure in seeing their lover satisfied. Thats it , not too difficult to grasp is it ? Well unfortunately not everyone can grasp that idea and thats because their are many elements that go along in fullfilling that "satisfied"
state. There is that emotional and mental element , making her feel secure, safe, wanted, desired, appreciated and cared for. When that is there then anything in the bedroom will be that much more enjoyable. There is nothing sexier and hotter than a lover who wants you to have an amazing experience and knows you and body well enough to take you where you have always wanted to go or to heights you never even thought of .
That includes using toys, props , whatever. When I hear a mans breathing change because he is aroused from playing with me ....oh my that gets me going even more , to hear the little noises he makes , his body language , knowing how into it he really is while bringing me to orgasm that is a real turn on . Doesnt matter if its his mouth, fingers, toy or cock. Its him and what he is doing to me .
Now to say that I would ever prefer a toy to the real thing , oh hell no ! There is playing , fucking and making love . Nothing replaces that intimacy of two people becoming one . For me ,When they care about each other, making love can be almost spiritual and I wouldnt prefer any toy over that feeling .