First, in June of 2017 I had open heart surgery. I needed to have a quadruple bypass of my major heart arteries. I was not sure at that time if I really wanted it or not. The alternative was certain death in about a week. At first I debated if I should go through with it or not. To do it won out.
After doing it once, I have made up my mind that I will not do it again should I ever need it again. It was a real experience that I do not want to go through again. I have said that if GOD wants me that bad that I need to be operated on like that again, that GOD can have me. I will not do it a second time.
Now before any of you say anything about that, let me say that to understand just how I feel about it, you must have first had it done to yourself. No one can understand it without having it done once. The feeling that you get after you wake up from it after five days of being kept in a coma that was medically induced, cannot be put into words. The second night after I was woken up from the coma, it was about 8:30 p.m. and my wife had gone home for the night. I was laying on my hospital bed and all the sudden out of the clear blue I started screaming at the top of my lungs. I was not in pain. I had been given enough pain killers that there was no pain. What I was screaming was, "GOD, why did I do this? Why did I not just say no and let YOU have me. Why, Why, Why. I kept repeating and repeating this. A nurse that was walking by my room heard me through the closed door and immediately burst in and tried to calm me down. It took her five minutes to do so. When I did calm down, she told me that it would all be okay and to think of still living. She stayed in the room with me until I fell asleep. NO, she did not get in the bed with me or do anything that could be considered sexual in any way. She was not even the nurse that was assigned to me. When my wife returned the next morning about 9:00 a.m.., I told her about the dream. She gave me a big hug and a big kiss and told me that she loves me. I gave her an even bigger hug and kiss and told her the same thing.
That was over three years ago by one extra month. Today my heart is doing just fine. But, as I said, if I ever need it again, my final answer, as in the newly created TV show, Who Want To Be A Billionaire, my final answer will be NO. And I will be the only ever contestant on that show and the answer of NO for the billion dollar question will be NO. I will get it correct and win the billion dollars. Of course, I will not get to enjoy it. However, my wife will and I know she will understand that she will once again have her chance to be with me when GOD tells her that it is her turn to die.