I have always been dominant in everything I do. I have been submissive only a few times, and that took lots of curiosity, some liquor and some high level of letting go.
As young boy my father used to make me take down my pants and turn away from him with my hands in the air and then cane me with a willow switch. (I was not a naughty child). He was passing on the abuse he himself endured. He was a good woodworker; he enjoyed making artful paddle boards just for my ass. But his favorite thing to do was to have me stand bottomless turned away from him. I didn’t dare look back, now I’m pretty sure he masturbated in between strikes.
As an adult I don’t mind spanking someone who wants wants it. As a matter of fact, that’s how I’ve determined why my father did it to me. It is a bit of a turn on. (I personally find no joy in pain, as you’ve likely figured out by now).
I broke the cycle by never ever hitting my own kids.
Besides being a tall strong voiced naturally dominant man, I also believe a good part of it is due to being strong enough to survive my abusive father’s poor behaviors.
Except for sexual situations, I can barely stomach subdominant people; I’m sure that stems from my cowardly mother who made no attempt to do anything to help me.
Parental roles definitely had an influence over me being dominant!