Your First Time Having Sex

Did not see this topic started anywhere here on the Kinky Board...

I've heard it said and have experienced it...."Nobody enjoys their first time". So what was it like for you the first time y'all have ever had sex?

For me, it wasn't lovely at all. I was expecting God to send a lightning bolt down to strike me in the ass because I wasn't married! That's what you get for growing up around religiously strict parents. But other than that, it still wasn't all that great. I was very uncomfortable and just felt awkward in my body afterwards. Thank God I don't get that feeling anymore!

I honestly don't remember the first time I had sex. I remember the first time I was French-kissed. (Ew, Daniel) The first time I was fingered. (Thanks, Troy) The first time I had anal sex. (Whoa, Steve) The first time I squirted. (Thanks, Michael) And some other kinky firsts. But the first time I had sex apparently was not that impressive. (Sorry, Troy. I know you did your best.)

~ Dianne

First times:

Inserted something in my ass: high school and it was a carrot. That became a habit!

First time naked with a girl: i was 19, she was 18. both her and I were virgins and we were naked touching each other but she was not ready to go for it.

First intercourse: same girl above. As soon as we got naked I pushed for a 69 and we did it. Then we did missionary. Showered and did it doggy style in the shower.

First time I fucked ass: my girlfriend (diff from above) let me do it and without a condom! I started in her pussy first and then while doing doggy style I fingered her ass and then she started using her pussy juice to lube her ass and then I fucked her and came in there.

First time fingered by someone: same girl above, used to give me head and finger me or toy my ass.

First time having my ass eaten: same girl above. Became part of oral routine and I used to moan like a whore she she locked me! I used to ask for it.

First time crossdressed and fucked by someone: same girl above, we both had sexy lingerie and she was on top with my legs spread out and up in the air with her holding a vibrator and fucking me throwing her body over mine!

It was over very quickly lol. I loved it, I suspect she did less so however I was back for more in less than 5 minutes and it was MUCH better the second time. Ah to be 16 again.

The first time was with another boy in the toilets. I still remember how erect member was straining against his underpants when he dropped his trousers. I remember being transfixed as the head turned people as he approached his climax and spurted seed over my face. I couldn't do that then.

The first time, of course I remember it. I had been a tampon user for some time and my boyfriend had fingered me any number of times so it didn't hurt. It is memorable because it was not only over way too soon, but also unprotected and I was worried sick until I got my period that month. It was an experience, but it wasn't necessarily enjoyable.

My first time was wonderful.

I was 17 and my first time wasn't with my husband, despite the fact that we knew each other for about five years before I had sex with anyone. It was with another one of my boyfriends. Having seen my share of porn and having a really good imagination, he and I were almost vying with each other for control over positions, etc. I mean, I AM the Domme!! I did stand my ground and make him oral me to an orgasm before he penetrated me. My mother had told me that penetration would be easier if I was fully aroused first. Penetration also wasn't difficult as I had been sticking my fingers, candles, carrots and cucumbers inside for a couple of years before having sex.

I've certainly had lousy sex, but it wasn't my first time.

To those of you who enjoyed your first time, I'm jealous, lol.

My first time was about 4 hours of pure hell actually. I was about 3 days from turning 20. His name was Luis, he was my neighbor and also one of my college professors from the semester before. Remember, I said before, not currently. I'm bad, but I'm not that bad, and I earned all of my college credits while being fully clothed, lol.

The one good thing he taught me was that I had a clit, and fingering it felt really really good. Don't ask me how I didn't know that existed before that, but God's honest truth, I never did. While he didn't make me cum by fingering me, he almost did. That's how we started. Then we moved to his bedroom, thats where I came face to face with 4 hours of hell and his one eyed Satin.

I must have been a little uptight or something because he tried his darnedest to get in and he just couldn't. I think he must have at some point because I was bleeding, but I know he wasn't able to stay in very long. It hurt like hell, burned like fire, and I kept squirming away. I am not sure he even came.

I bled for about 3 days, and all of my muscles hurt for a good week. It was a long time before I ever did that again, and the next time, it still hurt, but thankfully, not as bad.

When I went to my OB for my first kid he told me on the first visit that there was no way a baby was going to be able to come out the natural way and that I would have to have a c-section, and he was right, I did. So it's not that I am that much of a prude, I'm just naturally and genetically small/tight in that department. A curse for me, but a blessing for him? lol.

Mashie

My first time was at work when 17 at the Christmas do...behind a filing cabinet...we did keep in touch, literally and metaphorically for a couple of years after, as we both enjoyed our first time..but now she's in Australia...shame

I agree with the post above. It's really hard to define sex -- especially these days. People almost always seemed to imply penetrative intercourse. But now, a lot of people do a wide variety of things.

Is estim sex? Is a fucking machine sex? Is a vibrator sex? Is masturbating your partner sex? etc.

I agree with the post below. It's really hard to define sex -- especially these days. People almost always seemed to imply penetrative intercourse. But now, a lot of people do a wide variety of things. Is estim sex? Is a fucking machine sex? Is a vibrator sex? Is masturbating your partner sex? etc.

Oh boy, there is an entire thread on that.

Since you're new, I'll throw in my two cents and answer your question.

E-stim, fucking machines, vibrators, and masturbating your partner IS NOT sex. Sexual intercourse (a penis in a vagina) is sex. Everything else you mentioned is just playing with your or someone else's body, and making love isn't sex either, although you can make love while having sex. Playing with a penis or playing with a vagina, whether it is yours or someone else's, isn't sex. It's masturbating. Masturbating isn't sex either.

I have to disagree with you, Susie. By your definition, gay men can never have sexual intercourse because neither of them possess a vagina and lesbians can never have sexual intercourse because neither of them possess a penis.

Also "your first time" can be complicated to define if one has been a victim of incest or rape. So I firmly believe that losing ones virginity is when you voluntarily allow someone to penetrate one or both of your lower orifices for pleasure. Traditionally, it is a penis penetrating a vagina but it can also be a penis penetrating an anus or a woman penetrating another woman with something large enough, such as her fingers, hands or a toy that would cause her to lose her maidenhead (whether or not she still has her hymen.)

I know this is vague and contradictory enough to cause arguments but it's how I define it in my pretty little head. Everyone is welcome to his or her own definition.

I guess to be completely fair, the first time a person has sex is defined as the first time they themselves think they have had sex.

~ Dianne

Egirlky, I agree with you completely.

Everyone is welcome to his or her own definition.

Here it is folks. "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,

Than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

I was in high school and my bf and I had been talking about doing it. We were both virgins and wanted to do it so bad it hurt. That first time was on the lounge chair on his parent's patio. He had bought a box of condoms because I told him I wouldn't let him otherwise. We did it a couple of times after that before we broke up.

I was a late bloomer my first was at 22. Certainly made several attempts throughout my teens in car seats and fortunately just never happened although we both went home with a lot of sticky underwear. When we went to bed the first time it did not happen I was pretty frustrated but the girl was very understanding and we tried again the next night. The seas parted and the earth surely stopped rotating for a moment. It was wonderful we never missed a day for nearly two yrs. We drifted apart but I never forgot her 43 yrs ago.

. . . . By your definition, gay men can never have sexual intercourse because neither of them possess a vagina and lesbians can never have sexual intercourse because neither of them possess a penis. Also "your first time" can be complicated to define if one has been a victim of incest or rape. So I firmly believe that losing ones virginity is when you voluntarily allow someone to penetrate one or both of your lower orifices for pleasure. . . . ~ Dianne

Gay/lesbian/homosexual/bisexual/heteroflexible or whatever people playing with each other's same sex bodies do not have sex/sexual intercourse. Keep in mind with my saying that, I have been with women and played with their bodies as they have played with mine. We inserted various things inside each other's bodies, licked each other in all the proper places and played with plenty of toys. That's Masturbation, not sex. Yes, we all had a wonderful time, we all liked each other very much and we would do it again, and NO it isn't sex. That is not to say they ( and I include myself here) can't have a completely satisfying, meaningful, significant relationship without having a penis inside a vagina. Giving yourself an orgasm or fondling yourself isn't sex either. A man and woman naked in bed together hugging, fondling and loving each other (like my husband and I do almost every night) are not having sex either until the penis goes in the vagina (which DOESN'T happen every night).

"Sex" by having a penis in your rectum is a lot of fun, but is no more "sex" than putting your penis inside a carved out cucumber or stuffing that cucumber inside your vagina or rectum. It's playing with your body--masturbating.

Masturbating is stimulating the genitals for the pleasure of it. The dictionary does not set restrictions on how you masturbate or stimulate yourself. Sex, on the other hand requires a penis to be in the vagina.

"Your first time" if you are raped or a victim of incest IS STILL YOUR FIRST TIME, it's just a terrible introduction. Permission or liking the other person has no bearing on how you lose your virginity. I lost my hymen when I was about 12, but that didn't mean that was when I lost my virginity because I did it with my fingers, candles and cucumbers. I lost my virginity the first time I had a penis in my vagina, not when I stuffed candles and cucumbers inside myself.

You lose your sexual virginity when you have sexual intercourse the first time. It takes a man and a woman. You can call your first time lecturing to an audience "losing your public speaking or oration virginity" or the first time planting flowers in your garden "losing your gardening virginity" and you can call having a penis in your butt the first time "losing your anal virginity", but when it comes to sex, it's the first time you have a penis in a vagina.

When it comes to definitions, and you CAN NOT make them up as you go along or change them to fit your situation. Try taking an exam and telling the teacher, "everyone is entitled to their own definition." If you try that, I don't know if you will get laughed at or thrown out of the room faster.

If you want a new definition, create a new word and see it it catches on.

Masturbating isn't sex either.

That's what I told the judge! Seems folks point at things they see in the public park. I just don't understand...It's ok to prick your finger in the park, but it's not ok to finger !!!!!

The > 😄 made me write that.

Skybear

SKYBEAR, I hope your "first time" having sex was in a safer place than out in the open in a park (although I know it's exciting in a public place under a bit of cover).

Masturbating in a park could be construed as lewd, lascivious behavior, and the judge might also think it was indecent exposure. 😁 😁 😁 😁

The police and judges aren't especially known for having a good time. . . .

. . . . except with prostitutes ! ! ! ! ! !

I remember my first time. It was not terribly romantic, or stimulating, or satisfying. More than that, I'm not going to divulge. Thank goodness, sex (and making love) has gotten much, much better as time has passed.

Is it not amazing what time and years can do for depth of enjoyment ladydocisin.

I agree, Lady. The discussion has gone way off course. It's a shame it couldn't stay in the same vein it started in. I apologize. I just couldn't stand a few things I read and felt the need to defend against them. I know many women who were the victims of incest and who have been raped (including me) and I don't consider those incidents as "the first time having sex." I think it's a slap in the face to those who have been victimized by further having to relive their sexual assaults as their first time instead of letting them have the good memories of butterflies in their stomach, their heart racing, their cheeks flushing and their desire to give their body over to a lover and share in the beauty of making love together. I'm old-fashioned and simple that way. I think the first time having sex is the first time it's a happy moment for you and it fulfills you.

Since the sub-topic of definitions came up, here's a few I found online this evening:

WordNet Dicitonary: (Webster-Dictionary.org)

act of sexual procreation between a man and a woman; the man's penis is inserted into the woman's vagina and excited until orgasm and ejaculation occur

Merriam-Webster online dictionary: Definition of SEXUAL INTERCOURSE

1: heterosexual intercourse involving penetration of the vagina by the penis : coitus

2: intercourse (as anal or oral intercourse) that does not involve penetration of the vagina by the penis

dictionary.com: sexual intercourse

noun

genital contact, especially the insertion of the penis into the vagina followed by orgasm; coitus; copulation.

World English Dictionary:

the act carried out for procreation or for pleasure in which, typically, the insertion of the male's erect penis into the female's vagina is followed by rhythmic thrusting usually culminating in orgasm

American Heritage Stedman's Medical Dictionary

Sexual union between humans involving genital contact other than vaginal penetration by the penis.

This is another definition that I found looking up the "definition of sexual intercourse" (using google and the previous words in quotes) I came up with these two definitions

1) coitus

2) any physical contact between two individuals involving stimulation of the genital organs of at least one.

Taken from http://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/sexual+intercourse

I was 16 the first time I had sex. Seems like I am going along with the group in that it wasn't enjoyable. My Girlfriend at the time had lied to me saying she had had sex before. I don't know why however I had this Idea that I didn't want to take her virginity. Don't misunderstand I was horny as any other teenager but I still had the Idea. As it goes It didn't last any real measurable length of time. She complained it hurt like hell and bled for a few days after word. I however spent the next month or so scared to death I got her pregnant or I hurt her...It really is amazing after our first time and some of the bad experiences some of us had we choose to try sex again.

As far as the current sub topic, no matter what you call it first time you had sex (I am of the school of thought Penis in vagina= Sex) Don't jump my ass it is my opinion, well on 2nd thought, I don't care if you jump my ass what ever makes you feel better)

Sex is when i have a orgasm with another human being that got me there. PERIOD !!!!! If you bring yourself to orgasm then its masturbation (favortie pastime). But my first time was at 18 in my first serious gf's house late at night under her parents bedroom on the living room floor. Yeah i was scared shitless i would see the light come on and be busted. But it was my first so it didnt take long for me lol, Phewwww.

I was also late with my first time. Despite having had several GFs before, and us both having wanted to have sex, it never "felt right" to me & I was unable to do it. I was 19 when I eventually had intercourse for the first time. Wasn't good at all. Took a long time before it "felt right", then when I did penetrate her, I ejaculated virtually straight away. Future times were slightly better.

Have since found out (during counselling following an assault) that i was probably abused as a child, but have no direct memories of it, so for me this was my first time (even if technically it wasn't) - I agree with egiryky that the first time should be consentual not forced.

The first time doesn't seem to last very long but is sweet and hot and wonderful because of all the sexual tension, heavy petting and foreplay. Foreplay, is seems, becomes a lost art when we get older. We tend to get naked a lot faster than when we were first experimenting with sex. It's like skimming a naked to get to the good parts instead of lingering over the ambiance and enjoying every second.

Of course, it isn't just about the first time you have sex. It can be like that when you have sex with a new person for the first time. I remember one night when a friend of mine was over and we talked and played Scrabble together in the living room floor. We'd been flirting with each other and teasing each other for years and that night was the culmination of it all. There was something different in the mood and the sexual tension was so thick you could cut it with a night. He was 19 years old and a virgin. I was 28 and experienced. He leaned across the board and kiss me, deeply and passionately. He caressed my neck, back, shoulders and arms through my clothes as I did to him. I moved my hand under the front of his shirt and felt his warm skin under my hands. He shivered with excited and tentatively began caressing my breasts. My back arched and I moaned and breathed heavy so he knew that I wanted it and more. He slid the board game away and reached under my shirt and touched my breasts through my bra. Then slid the bra down so he could caress my nipples. He bent down to catch one in his mouth and gently kissed and sucked my hard nipples that were just aching for his attention. I touched his hard cock through the front of his jeans and he moaned with excitement. We held each other close and caressed each other like mad.

We knew we had to take it further so we went into the bedroom and threw ourselves onto the bed and peeled off each others clothes while caressing and licking every inch of each others body. The moon was full that night and it lit up the otherwise darkened room. The light came in between the slats of the mini-blinds and I could see the contrast of our skin - my soft pale skin against his taut ebony skin. Heat was rising from our bodies as we kissed and clung to each other tightly. His fingers fumbled with my clit before finding the entrance to my wet pussy. He slid two fingers inside and gasped at the soft wetness he'd dreamed about all his life. He buried his face between my legs and licked my sweet juices. When he came up several minutes later, I tasted myself on his lips. We knew we could wait no longer. I was on my back with my legs spread. He moved into place between my legs and raised himself up onto his arms while he thrust inside me (or any woman for that matter) for the first time. Then *poof* he was done and feel asleep between my legs.

The next morning, he apologized for messing up my sheets but I told him not to worry about it. He apologized for cumming so quickly and I told him that everything leading it to it was so amazing and sexy that I didn't need to cum. That it was just wonderful kissing him and holding him all night. Our friendship continued and we shared a bed from time to time. I taught him how to please a woman with his fingers, tongue and with toys, and introduced him to oral sex, rimming and prostate massage. He was a wonderful pupil and his future girlfriends and wives appreciated my instruction. He's married to a lady in northern Indiana so I haven't seen him in years. But we still keep in touch online. He's one of a kind and seems to think I'm one of a kind, too.

~ Dianne

That's a great story egirlky. Maybe you should have started it with: ..."It was a dark and stormy night..."

I was 19 and a freshman in college. It wasn't that great, at least for me. It was kind of awkward and it hurt, even though I was quite horny. I still lived at home but we were in college and no one was home so we did it in my twin bed in the room I shared with my sister, LOL. I don't know how he felt about it enjoyment wise. It got better as time went on though... now its 10 years later and we're married and its much better than it was 10 years ago!