Hey @des, I really encourage you to talk to him about it!
I was married and never really spoke to my wife about being interested in her gyn exams, and when she discovered it - walked in on an extended internet browsing session... — she didn’t take it well, actually equated my interest with rape...
“do you have any idea how exposed and vulnerable a woman feels in that position?” she asks me... I knew better than to answer honestly, “well, yeah, that’s kind of the point...but just as a fantasy” And it never really went away, always hanging out there...
It’s not the same as your situation, but if I may offer, it’s so much better to be open and up front. Your husband might be as nervous as I was and afraid to share... He may not be, but if you talk about your interests he might become so. He may never, but I’ll bet, at the very least, he’ll respect your interest and maybe meet you half way!
I wish I had done so... if I had, at least my wife wouldn’t have been surprised and felt I was dishonest, maybe would have come around. Or maybe we would have come to realize one of our irreconcilable differences sooner, and found more compatible partners earlier in life.
Ok, damn - sorry, TMI, but hey - it’s advice from the heart 😃