Did childhood spankings cause a fetish?

Had a quick look at the medical literature, and was suprised to find children who are spanked aren't more likely to be sexually masochistic as adults. Apparently childre who have multiple painful medical procedures are slightly more likely to develop masochism.

As to why children who are spanked could go on to develop a spanking kink. Others here have mentioned children unconsciously sexualizing childhood spankings to cope with the intense negative feelings, and Jaqueline Omerta's theory that abused children grow up craving the reasonable, loving discipline they never had. That last one really resonates with me. Another theory is that touching bottoms is inherently sexual, particularly on the bare, and that bottoms are close to erogenous zones, so we get a sexual response.. again, sounds right in my case.

I fantasize about being spanked by ‘daddy’ and I never knew my dad or got spanked by a man as a child.

I can say many of the females and males I have spanked had some or many had a lot of spankings as a kid growing up.

Many want that old fashion Daddy spanking and actually request it and for those who may not have had a daddy spank them it seems it is more of an attraction to want that older/daddy male to give them the spanking and disciplines.

I was only spanked by my Mother and Grandmothers. Never by my Dad. He would get the belt out and snap it, to make a sound, but that was it. All I know is I crave good swats... but not sure how much I can handle yet.

Certainly childhood memories form our behavior.

I clearly remember that we got flogging from mom, grandmother, rarely from father for any misbehavior. It was a performance that everyone should watch. The convict was over knee with a bare butt, and we as viewers, We counted the strokes with a withy, birch, lash or cane...

Corporal punishment was normal for children. It was common in schools, as well as pulling someone up for hair or ears. Hitting, spanking the hands was an educational measure. In many parts of Europe it was ordinary up to 1970. In many regions this is still being done today. In my house we still have that habit. More in my stories.

In many parts of Europe it was ordinary up to 1970. In many regions this is still being done today. .

Not to contradict, but I went to school in Belgium from 1963, in Jesuit schools no less which are known for their hard-nosed no-nonsense attitude. Never once, not ever was corporal punishment inflicted as punishment. Not once.

I have spoken with many friends here who did not have the luck and joy of being sent to a Jesuit school, who rather went to another Catholic institution or to a public school, and here too the same answers: no corporal punishment. Nada, nothing.

This is not to say that pupils weren't given a rap over the hand or a slap over the head by certain teachers who could not control themselves. But as official policy, there was no corporal punishment.

Punishments were usually detention and/or writing pages and pages of something, either copying texts from books or more perversely, making one write an own essay of so many pages long.

At this time, no country in Europe allows corporal punishments in school. Not one. And many countries also ban the practice in the home.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corporal_punishment#/media/File:Corporal_punishment_in_Europe.svg

YES YES and YES

i've mentioned elsewhere on the site, i was disciplined at school and at home, and them by a schoolmaster after leaving school, certainly it is something that thinking out arouses me, so it is definately a fetish, and i would like to be thrashed now just as i was as a schoolboy to see how i react

Absolutely!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just the idea of being turned over a lady's (especially a strict lady) lap, the act of being bared, lowering the pants and underwear laying there feeling the cool air on the once covered and heated buttocks. Laying there as she scolds you anticipating the first impact of her hand or paddle sure set me to a spanking fetish. That is the same thing that prepared me for an enema fetish too. Think about it........ SHE is controlling you, being able to see an intermit part of your body that you cannot even see (without the help of a mirror) then giving you pain/pleasure with each spank. You can't get up until SHE is satisfied that you were punished enough. Then sometimes made to stand in the corner with your pants down facing the wall so SHE can admire your very red well spanked buttocks. It drives me NUTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wasn't spanked as a child, but as a mid-teen began reading men's magazines, the kind with letters to the editor but before Penthouse made those letters even more popular. I was drawn to the letters (which I now realize were erotic fiction) which concerned marital spanking, for discipline or for "just because."

The old Yahoo groups and their predecessors let me find other people in my area who were also interested in spanking, and I became an active participant, first on the chat groups, and then at real time spanking parties. I was a dedicated spanker for many years before becoming a switch.

I seem to be well entrenched in the fetish, but I had to discover it on my own - there were no childhood spankings to aid or deter me.

As a way to gauge my answer, the only parental spanking I remember is when my dad broke the heavy plastic hairbrush on my rear. However, I remember every detail of the two school paddlings I received.

The first memory from my early childhood was a discussion about spankings between me (4), an older boy (8 ), and my babysitter (12). It was a simple “how do YOU get it” discussion I’m sure many kids have had over the years. And I knew of no child growing up who did not get spanked at least occasionally. (I still find it hard to believe someone could go their whole childhood and not get spanked!)

But when my babysitter revealed she got spanked bare bottom, over the knee by her stepdad, that was the moment I think my little mind officially went spanko. Keep in mind, this babysitter went naked in front of me while watching me a couple of times and also had full permission to spank me (as did any adult I had offended in any way).

Most of my own spankings are fuzzy memories, with only a few standing out in my mind, otherwise I just dreaded them and avoided them at all costs. However I became obsessed with trying to witness my babysitter get spanked, with no luck at all. Later I would try to see other kids get spanked...while trying to maintain enough distance to not get one myself (guilt by association was reason enough for a spanking). But I was never successful.

I also would look up “spanking” in the dictionary all the time, and my ears would perk up at any discussion of spanking taking place among my peers. However the older I got, the more I knew this was an unhealthy fascination, and tried to hide it from others.

Spanking actually did work with me into teenage years. I avoided behaviors I knew would result in a spanking, and stayed out of trouble. But the matter of wanting to be a witness to someone else’s spanking and wanting to hear all the juicy details persisted.

Eventually I wanted to spank and be spanked actively (just not by parents or other relatives), and today I have spanked a number of adult females and have been spanked by a number of adult males and females. And it’s not necessarily a turn on, I don’t get aroused at all most of the time. It’s just a weird quirk of mine.

I knew of no child growing up who did not get spanked at least occasionally. (I still find it hard to believe someone could go their whole childhood and not get spanked!)

.

Why is that so difficult to believe? There are parents who are principled about physical punishments and keep to their convictions about not inflicting physical punishment on children. It is because of such people/parents that we now see more and more states and nations adopting laws that prohibit physical punishment of minors. Such laws don't just fall out of the sky because of some legislative whim or flight of fancy, they usually reflect the beliefs and wishes of a large part of the citizenry. And it takes a while for the idea to gain momentum before making it into actual legislation, meaning that this notion is not new at all.

It is almost like many Americans simply not understanding that most men in the world are not circumcised. How many accounts have we had here about being baffled and amazed at seeing (or even learning about) uncircumcised male genitals?

It would be nice but some people think their narrow view of the world and their life experiences define the world in its entirety.

Sorry, but I just couldn't help but use this very appropriate quote from another post of yours in another spanking thread.

Sorry, but I just couldn't help but use this very appropriate quote from another post of yours in another spanking thread.

Except that I’m not pouring my derision and disbelief on anyone. This is a generalized statement, and it’s not that I don’t believe it and think it’s just a made up scenario, it’s stating that it’s hard for me personally to imagine, which is why it was a parenthetical statement and not a direct statement. It’s like saying I can’t imagine anyone going a week without eating meat. It’s not that I don’t believe it happens, it’s just that I’ve never done it so I can’t imagine it.

I didn’t directly quote someone and say I didn’t believe them or mock them for being a phony, though

I recall exactly one spanking in my childhood, and at most 2-3 enemas. I have zero to minimal interest in erotic spanking, but have loved enemas at latest since about age 15 when I started giving them to myself, now 67. Go figure.

Eric

They must have. There is something about witnessing a "scene" that is set up like what I received as a girl. If the setting and the implement used are "right," the reaction is vastly different. The "triggers" are based on real events, but the reenactment is purely voluntary. I react to the scene differently if it appears plausible, and that is why chains, leather, etc. don't elicit the same response. That just wasn't the way it happened then, so it isn't what I'm looking for now.

My present interest is very much related to childhood spankings and is narrowly focused on realistic roleplay re-creation of childhood discipline spankings.

Growing up, spankings always were such a very dramatic experience with strong powerful feelings and emotions to them and surrounding them.

As a kid I totally dreaded and hated spankings and they were such a negative thing. If somebody told then me that years later I would want to re-create and receive them again, I would not believe it. Yet, now childhood spankings are not negative memory and I remember them as strict but also caring parental discipline, very childish and boyish, and now a dramatic (and mostly positive or warm) part of childhood memories, although back then I'd find it hard to believe.

I guess as a grown-up you in general see things differently than a kid in many ways. Starting from, as an adult you can be nostalgic about childhood times, but as a child you are not, so things are certainly perceived differently from different age perspectives.

I guess the change in perception may be because, looking back as a grown-up, parental spankings were a very juvenile and very parental punishment, somehow almost quintessential about the childhood, where parental strictness and parental care were fused inseparably (and, in fact, strictness was a part of parental care), a loving if also strict punishment for a kid, and was also a very dramatic experience for a boy (is there anything more dramatic for a boy than being spanked?), imbued with very strong powerful feelings. Feelings that I wish now to re-live, along with other parts of the reality of boyhood punishment spankings: lecturing by dad for misbehavior, the traditional ritual of juvenile pants and underpants-down spanking, the taste of dad's paddle or belt on a boy's bare bottom, and the ordeal of bare-bottomed spanking pain of a sound juvenile/adolescent disciplinary spanking.

A spanking is a young boy's nightmare and dread, but re-living it is a very intense experience for a grown-up man with the same boy still inside.

Nothing takes back to age 13 like a juvenile pants-down discipline spanking from dad or mom, and the searing fire of dad's paddle or belt (or mom's switch) across the naughty boy's bare bottom.

Which I guess may be one reason I feel now driven to re-create and re-live these experiences... exactly because they were (and still are) so intense and dramatic, and deeply linked with the childhood, somehow at its very core.

And may be also because as a kid, a spanking was the end of the world, whereas now it is still an intense experience, but now I know I am going to survive it.

So in part it may be facing childhood spankings that I dreaded as a kid and in a way overcoming this childhood dread.

So some years back I started seeking to re-live boyhood punishment spankings, in age-regressed roleplay but realistic way and with all the feelings they caused, with all their childish ritual, apprehension, overwhelming spanking sting and pain, boyish embarrassment and strong sense of dad's parental authority, all the plethora of intense feelings spankings caused growing up.

Grew up 1950's, blue collor town. I was spanked only a few times, but did see on the outside others being spanked. Worse was a girl I liked whom I encouraged to talk back to her mother, believing her mother was not very strict. I was very wrong and within minutes the mother had a yardstick, lifted the girls skirt, had her panties down was spanking her daugher till her backside was bright red. I felt so helpless and so guilty along with the shock and awe of seeing my friend so exposed. The spanking left it's mark on me long (a lifetime long) after any marks were left on the girl's backside.

And may be also because as a kid, a spanking was the end of the world, whereas now it is still an intense experience, but now I know I am going to survive it.

.

I wasn't spanked, but I was punished in other ways. And one thing I learned very early on, was that the punishments were certainly not the end of the world or much of anything, except a temporary inconvenience. They were not more than that. I knew that invariably after going to bed or even just a long enough interval, things would be back to normal.

It really didn't take much observation to deduce that my parents' anger at whatever I may have done, didn't last long.

one thing I learned very early on, was that the punishments were certainly not the end of the world or much of anything, except a temporary inconvenience

And that's the difference between spankings, at least harder spankings, and more placid punishments. Sure, one may rationally know there is a valley on the other side of Mt. Everest – but it is not seen from this side, and knowing there is an eventual valley does not make scaling the mountain much easier.

Although spankings were actually pretty short and lasted may be only a minute or two, but they stung and hurt like no tomorrow and made you think they would never end, and that you just could not stand it... but you still had no choice but to accept the punishment even while crying hard and begging parents.

Looking back, my parents spankings certainly were not abusive, they were normal age-appropriate juvenile disciplinary spankings according to the notions of the time and neighborhood, albeit perhaps somewhat on the stricter side of the parenting. They never bruised or anything, just left the bottom reddened up and sore for a short time, but with all redness and soreness gone soon. However as a kid they sure hurt like the blazes, and certainly did not feel "endurable", and I always ended up totally crying my eyes out already early into the spanking. There just was no way not to, my dad's paddle or belt made sure of that. Profuse repentant crying and sore bare bottom set on fire were an expected and indeed a mandatory part of a discipline spanking in our house.

Young kids have tender bottoms and low pain tolerances, so it did not take much for the spanking to feel incredibly painful. The sting built up rapidly and I would feel I just could not stand it, but the spanking did not stop and kept going, and there was nothing I could do to stop it or ease it up, and the sting and pain was building up and up, and I would burst in to panic. Every short instant at this point seemed like an eternity. And since my dad never announced beforehand any set count of paddle spanks or belt licks and always went I guess by my reaction and his feeling I had been punished enough and learned my lesson, I never knew how long the spanking was going to last. The spanking was always open-ended, with no any definite end to it. Looking from the outside, spankings may have been a minute or two, but for the spanked kid they did not feel like a minute or two, but like an eternity in hell, and time during spankings measured not in minutes, but in paddle spanks or belt licks... and it was an eternity that seemed like it was never going to end.

It did not happen like this every time, but for bigger spankings it did, and for more usual spankings it was similar too, some of it.

So knowing from previous spankings what I was about to get, a coming spanking _was_ the end of the world. Apprehension before spankings was intense. Walking home with a note from school knowing Dad would almost surely spank for it, I'd feel butterflies in the stomach and jelly knees as the home was getting closer. And not only me. I remember I was once walking home from school with a buddy who lived nearby and he had a bad report card that day and was expecting a spanking from his parents, and he almost cried by the time we got to his home.

This near-hitchcockian suspense and intense fright were a part of strong powerful feelings that surrounded spankings.

to accept the punishment even while crying hard and begging parents.

Profuse repentant crying and sore bare bottom set on fire were an expected and indeed a mandatory part of a discipline spanking in our house.

.

I think I would have been mortified of crying in front of anyone when I was a child. I did indeed never get spanked but I feel I would have burned bright with rage had it ever happened and would have refused to give the satisfaction.

I did get some slaps in the face in front of my class from a volatile nun once. If looks could have killed, she would have dropped dead at my feet, that is how intense I glared at her. Otherwise not a twitch.

I think the only time I ever cried when young was at 9 when I fell off a horse while learning how to jump fences. I broke my elbow and when the doctor told me so in hospital after x-rays, I mistakenly thought that that meant my arm was going to be sawed off/amputated. That I didn't like at all! Came from seeing too many war movies at a young age I guess ... ha ha

I thought about this for a while. I got one belt whooping from my dad. After that whooping, I crave for him to do it again. He felt bad after that first one and never did it again. My mom never spanked me.

I think I was spanked once as a child. I had no desire to ever be spanked again during childhood. So no I don’t think childhood spanking results in adult fetishes.

So no I don’t think childhood spanking results in adult fetishes.

I kind of like the idea of adult spankings, my wife did too. However I was never spanked when young, so my present interest can't come from any childhood incident.

So, sometimes that explanation works, and at other times it doesn't.

I think I would have been mortified of crying in front of anyone when I was a child. I did indeed never get spanked but I feel I would have burned bright with rage had it ever happened and would have refused to give the satisfaction.

With my parents, not crying during a spanking was not an option. In fact as a younger kid, age 10-11 or so tears sometimes started as soon as a spanking was announced or pants were being pulled down.

I did indeed never get spanked but I feel I would have burned bright with rage had it ever happened and would have refused to give the satisfaction.

Trust me, any rage would have been spanked out of you very quickly.

Trust me, any rage would have been spanked out of you very quickly.

With my parents, not crying during a spanking was not an option.

If so, it would probably have been temporarily. There are things from my younger days that I have still not forgotten or even forgiven. Remember what they say about the dish that is best served cold? ... ha ha.

With my parents, my mother especially, crying would have made things worse. She did not care for crybabies. Every now and then she'd tell me about her childhood and her mother, that if she dared cry about anything - like going to a dentist or so - then her mother would promise to really give her a reason to cry. So, not a peep, preferably not a sniffle. Crying was for babies and sissies and wimps.

I think happen with medical and spanking situations. 100%

Jess,

Sorry this happened to you. Always try to remember that none of this was your fault and you can't help the way you feel.

Good luck,

Anna

Trust me, any rage would have been spanked out of you very quickly.

Bullshit. Not everyone is weak.

I was spanked several times as a child, but have no desire to spank or be spanked as an adult.

mother would promise to really give her a reason to cry. So, not a peep, preferably not a sniffle. Crying was for babies and sissies and wimps.

As the oldest of 10 I would have to say this was the prevailing opinion at my house. Only the very young cried and as you got older siblings would make fun of you if you cried. There wasn't much spanking either, I learned that after a lady told me she got spanked if she fought her mom getting an enema. We added that to the session and she really went ballistic. Pretty hot times