Losing a Dom/sub

Some things come to an end eventually, including a relationship with a Dom/sub. So for the people who have lost their Dom/sub or have some advice for the people who go throw this- how do you get over 'the break-up'? I need answers/advice but I also want others to see this when their Dom/sub relationship ends. Even if it wasn't serious or offical. Long or short, no matter how it ended. It's still a loss of a friend and someone you trust deeply. Thanks

D/s relationship break-ups are hard, and just like in vanilla life sometimes they are harder on one of the parties due to the fact that the other was not as vested.

I have seen a few D/s couples break up. One breakup of Domme/female sub has caused a split in the BDSM community in their town with friends taking sides and not talking to the other side. Another break-up was done during camp when a Dom got annoyed with his sub/wife and took her collar away in front of a whole bunch of people, devastating the girl.

What I am trying to point out is that just like in vanilla life, a D/s break-up is hard and takes time to recoup from it, but that also as in vanilla life just because one subject does something wrong and breaks up a relationship it does not mean that everyone else in the same position will act the same way.

After such a break-up learning to trust again is hard but it can be done.

I find loosing a dom/daddy very very hard and it always takes me ages to get over it i retreat into myself and become so introvert it does take me a long time to let someone in again but then again that is true with most relationships although because of the nature of a D/s relationship as in it is a lifestyle more than a relationship i do feel it is marginally worse when a sub loses a Dom or vice versa than in a vanilla relationship that is why it hurts so much and why i personally take so long to let someone in again but when i do i fall deeply

You need to take time and technically mourn for the loss but remember that those experiences make you who you are. It will take time to trust someone but it will happen.

Part of the issue, as I observed during the 4 years that I lived in the leather community in San Francisco, is that the sub is just that; i.e., submissive to the Dom. And, then to lose that relationship, unlike a vanilla relationship in most forms, can leave the sub without the protection that has been enjoyed and a part of (typically) her life, beside all of the components within the D/s relationship. It can be a tough road.

It is a very big challenge! The only break-up relationship that I observed as being more challenging was in women's D/s relationships. There, it seemingly could sometimes take a year or two for the sub to overcome the loss.

Be careful with your friends and try to understand and appreciate them.

Now, go out and have a gr8 weekend!