Telling your partner about your medical fetish

It sounds like there's a lot being repressed there.

I tried to convey my interest in getting spanked to early girlfriends, to no avail. Perhaps I was too oblique. Perhaps one understood but did not want to have anything with that.

I later met my future wife on a (now long gone) electronic discussion board dealing with kinky stuff. At that point we were both unsure of the other's kink catalogue but at least we knew we would not shock by discussing them to each other.

I do have a heart fetish only and I only once dared to tell a girl about. The other girl's I had might at least have thougt about it, cause I always used every single opportunity to ear-steth them. But I never spoke about it. Telling them, that I am crazy for heartbeats and asking them, whether I my steth them with my stethoscopes would just be much to embarrissing for me. sadly...

The moral of the story is hopefully, you should feel comfortable with your partner to share what you like. They will never say 'yes' if you don't even ask!

This! Right here. @MarcNY I'm with you 100%

If the relation is not solid enough to be open and honest about something that is obviously a part of you...The degree of that varies, but. It's there and more than likely will never diminish. So, you decide to spring your love for injections on your new Fiance. I mean better now than later...Right? OK, you tell her that and she freaks out. Decides maybe marriage is not the best plan. My thoughts on that scenario are as follows: Good riddance, you incredibly boring lay at best and frigid is certainly not out of the question. If its an individual that will not have a discussion about a particular passion of yours, it may not work anyway. Regardless of kink. Any mature adult should be able to discuss most anything. Look.....If your thing is breaking in the morgue and plowing the recently departed, yea....She's OK if she splits. But refusing a convo on shots, heart fetish(Me) or any other countless, harmless kinks sounds like it is not a rational individual. Only thing I see down the line is trouble.

This with some damn sense of course.....Don't hit her on the second date that you want her to literally fuck your mouth to death with her...Correction, your strap-on.....

Bring it up though. Especially if you see a future with her/him.

It may be they won't even try it.....Most times, I've found...If they really like you. Love, Care....Whichever...Wherever in the relationship you may be....If they give two squirts about you. It will not be a big deal at all. It really won't. It has to be someone you are close to. Not a second, or 15th date.....After you are both very solid and comfortable. Easy Peasy More than not, the party being told about this secret kink you have....Youve never told anyone because you were too embarrassed, they are going to just die right then and there......You have told them you biggest secret. Entrusted that. To them. They find it endearing. And more than likely, rush home to dress you in her panties and chase you around the house as you scream for her to Kiss your Grits, or maybe she cant wait to show you her full on DeMask, custom made black ass coal, shiny, luxurious full latex catsuit with inflatable dildo and butt plug built in fr her pleasure....She has never shown it to anyone....For fear of backlash....Don't let this happen to you. Good day, all.

I have never brought this topic up with my wife. I know she hates going to the dr, so if I would bring this topic up, I would probably get one of those "weirded out" looks and it would end right there.

My husband and I have been married for over 40 years. For most of those years I thought my arousal during medical procedures was out of the normal but I did discuss my arousal with my husband. When I found medical fetish sites and realized that I was not the only one This was also discussed. My husband and I have a very open relationship and discuss just about everything. While my husband does not share my fetish he is supportive. The sad part of all of this is that I have very rarely been able to find anyone located around me to explore this fetish.

I have never told my partner about any of this, and never will. He doesn't share it, wouldn't understand it, and him trying in some way to factor it into our sex life just to please me would be miserable failure. For me, it can only truly work with someone who shares the fetish.

I can't tell my partner. He wouldn't understand. I know that 100%. Then, it would remain there as this huge embarrassment for ever. No way, I'm not telling him.

Absolutely...how to go about. Jokingly? Hard to bring up for sure.

If people aren't getting together for similar kink/sex interests, what IS the connection then? How do you connect then???

Most people don't seem to want to have any serious conversations outside of their favorite beer, "their team", how many things they own, etc.

They don't want to talk about the latest radio signals coming from another galaxy or why the quality of cars is going down. So if you aren't connecting casually, what is the draw? Everyone isn't a 10 looks wise...

Frankly, I'm much more reluctant to hear about THEIR kinks/fetishes/limits.

If people aren't getting together for similar kink/sex interests, what IS the connection then? How do you connect then???...

Well that's the thing. You know from someone's profile what their kink is. Great, that covers the first half hour of conversation. Now, if you can actually maintain conversation for a couple more hours, the conversation just might turn to more than just their favorite beer or sports team. They might also learn more about YOU than your favorite beer or sports team.

I've met people through here that I'm proud to call my friends. The ones I've met in person have been interesting people. Kinky people are rarely boring people. Some have been friends for more than a decade, and our kinks have become more of a side issue than the main issue.

What is the connection then? There may not be one.. Or you might meet your next best friend.

Well that's the thing. You know from someone's profile what their kink is. Great, that covers the first half hour of conversation. Now, if you can actually maintain conversation for a couple more hours, the conversation just might turn to more than just their favorite beer or sports team. They might also learn more about YOU than your favorite beer or sports team.

I've met people through here that I'm proud to call my friends. The ones I've met in person have been interesting people. Kinky people are rarely boring people. Some have been friends for more than a decade, and our kinks have become more of a side issue than the main issue.

What is the connection then? There may not be one.. Or you might meet your next best friend.

I don't think you understood my post. I wasn't necessarily talking about on here. I was asking how people were able to meet others and have relationships, when they had no idea what the person liked sexually or kink-wise. I should have said it's next to impossible to have deep discussions with most people, since they won't go beyond superficial things, so how do these people form relationships?

A fake cough - "I think I'm coming down with something" may not be welcome these days unfortunately. Tough times for certain. 😢

@Rolereversal

....married for over 40 years. For most of those years I thought my arousal during medical procedures was out of the normal but I did discuss my arousal with my husband. ... snip... While my husband does not share my fetish he is supportive. ... snip

This key to sharing. Crawl, walk, run. Plant the seed. Noticing something, the arousal at the real gyn exam, or mentioning a conversation with a girlfriend, (i.e., my goodness, my gf just told me she likes her husband to ...?)

And then ask your partner, "What do you think of that?

Then wait.

They may bring it up in a couple of weeks.

If not you bring it up again.

Do any of you here at Zity look at tumblr or look at porn or read erotica with your partner?

That may be the first step.

It can be a tricky situation, whether medical fetish or any other sexual interest, because you can never predict how someone will react. Communication is sometimes easy, other times very difficult. The chemistry between two people plays a big role.

I’ve mentioned my specific, personal interests to several of the women I’ve dated and although most were open-minded and understanding and not overtly critical, some simply didn’t share my specific fetish, some did, and one woman was downright rude, accusatory, and demeaned me. Of those who shared similar interests as me, some wanted to explicitly discuss them, while others were too shy to verbalize what they happily engaged in physically with me.

My current girlfriend and I explored one another early on, bodies and minds, as couples do, and discussed our likes and dislikes as we became more comfortable with each other. I even told her about my experience being examined by my pediatrician, around 12 or 13 once my hormones kicked in, and how stimulating and exciting and deeply intimate and almost sexual that experience was. She listened quietly and nodded and made me feel OK about it (I was very nervous to tell her about it). She didn’t share any similar experience or feeling about doctors, so I assumed she didn’t have the same intense feelings. But I did feel that she accepted my feelings about this so-called medical fetish.

So, many weeks later, after thinking about it a lot, I finally got up the courage to say to her, “I want you to pretend to be my doctor and take my temperature.” She nodded and smiled and calmly said “OK. Do you have a thermometer?” Although I didn’t know if she knew what I really meant. So I answered, “Yes I do.” Long pause. “And I want you to take it in my bottom. Rectally.” I know my face flushed then and the second or two before she replied seemed like forever. She calmly said, “OK let’s go get it.”

I was breathing a huge sigh of relief as we went together to my bedroom. Now I was suddenly realizing that IT’S GOING TO HAPPEN. Heart pounding! And so it did and her touch was exquisite and it was so wonderful.

Suffice to say, that was our first time crossing that boundary together. And she has taken my temperature many times since. As I’d been suspecting, she has no desire to be the patient, but always is willing to be the doctor for me when my “need” arises, whether it be a prolonged examination of my penis and testicles, doing a thorough digital rectal exam, or taking my temperature. And when we play doctor I suppose you could say that the exam always ends with a sperm sample, though we’ve never used a proper receptacle!

Obviously our Play Doctor play is not as strict or real life or elaborate as I see in some Zity member’s posts and photos. But it works for us. And although our specific interests or fetishes don’t match, and yes there are times when I wish we did “match” better, we understand each others’s sexual desires and are happy to help each other live them.

Its so difficult to tell.even if your partner have same fetish he could lie that he didnt have it

I certainly envoy all the people , that have a partner , that enjoys medical fetishes . I believe it maybe easier to win a lottery jackpot , than finding a partner that enjoys a medical fetish . The worse thing for a man ,is to find a nurse , the majority of nurses that I have met want to leave their job at work and some are insulted by just the idea of a medical fetish . It is also difficult for a male to find a female that enjoys , nudism as well . It is also very difficult for a man to find a lady , that is a professional , that will agree to a medical fantasy .Oh well,what is a guy to do???

Lots of good stuff here. This is a tough topic and I have posted about it myself in other threads. I too have been married for 40 years to a wonderful woman (a nurse, to boot) who knows about my fetish and accepts it but she simply does not share it. She is a sexually conventional person and tends to associate sex more with romance than I do. We are in our 60's and still have sex around three times a week (better living through chemistry!) which we both greatly enjoy--in our different ways. Because we deeply love each other we have found a “Venn diagram” of overlapping sexual turn-ons that work for us. I meet my med-fet desires mostly through masturbation and enjoying the discussions and images here on Zity and other sites. To use an over-used expression--it's all good! 😃

I'm someone who has some problems with interpersonal relationships. Because of that issue, I don't have a partner, I just had 2. I didn't tell them but I have a plan to tell it to a girl that I like. I cannot predict her reaction, according to that, I may not to pursue the conversation.

A little bit, but I find it's much easier after some intimacy with your partner. It helps to learn about your partner's body - what they really enjoy. Then you can have the talk about each other's fetishes or kinks. In my case cardiophilia is unusual, but most women are not put off by it at all. A partner is much more likely to try it if you are open to trying theirs.

There are some things I won't do at all, and in that case I wouldn't expect my partner to reciprocate with mine.

With my first husband, it was not a problem because that was what we did on our first date, but for the rest I am always wary in case they think I am weird because I love being examined by anyone not just my current partner, and not necessary as a prelude to sex which of course happens in a relationship.

I grew into the fetish by watching my ex-gf get examined by a male doc at our local walk-in clinic, the first time I saw him examine her, I was overtaken by jealousy, then it took a year of watching him examine her and other times imagining if she had enjoyed it. Eventually I grew into it and one day had the guts to bring it up to her afraid shed be disgusted, well, she was into it too, and it began way before we met. So after discussing all those exams I watched her receive, we both agreed to pursue it together. I watched her male internist give her a full physical, and It was way more exciting sitting there watching knowing that she shared the fetish and was laying there receiving a real exam. There definitely some parts of the exam I enjoyed more than she did and vice versa, but just at least having someone to share it with is great.

It took more time, but then we eventually agreed to let each other pursue it further, I found other “patients” to examine, and she got exams from other play docs (with me watching). After that relationship ended, I definitely bring it up a lot sooner with any woman I'm seeing.

I’ve never told my partners. But I used to be in a relationship with a doctor. if I was every feeling unwell he would quiz me about symptoms and then say would you mind if I examined you. He didn’t know about my fetish and who was I to say no.

I remember him using his stethoscope a lot, his exams seemed to last a while. Who knows maybe he was into it. If he ever went out and left his work bag I would go in and take out his stethoscope and have a listen to my heart and belly. I should have said something looking back!

It takes a leap of faith, good open communication and not dumping your fetish or desires on your partner like a fire hose.

But, that said, when you are on your death bed, you don't regret the things you did, or tried, you regret the things you didn't do.

But, that said, when you are on your death bed, you don't regret the things you did, or tried, you regret the things you didn't do.

That is so true! Even before you croak you may regret things you could have done while you were young but are no longer an option!

But, that said, when you are on your death bed, you don't regret the things you did, or tried, you regret the things you didn't do.

It might very well be such a long list that I won't have enough time to go through them all … 😃

I wish that I would had to courage to tell my boyfriends in my teenage years about my anal and medical fetishes. I would stick the eraser end of the pencil in my butt in my teenage years. It felt so good but I thought this activity made me feel weird. Once, I was so excited that I thought my second boyfriend was going to stick his cock in my ass. I could feel the tip of his cock right at the entrance of my butt hole but sadly he stuck it in my pussy. I wanted my third boyfriend to stick his cock in my ass but it hurt too much that he gave up trying and said that anal sex was for gays. In my mid to late 20’s, I met an older guy who used his finger and dildo in my butt. OMG! It felt so wonderful. Unfortunately, we were just a casual hook up because his job only lasted a couple of weeks. It was not until I met my husband that I found out that it was normal to be anal erotic. Then my fetish life blossomed. But, I do wish that I would have be more vocal about my fetishes in my earlier years.

But, that said, when you are on your death bed, you don't regret the things you did, or tried, you regret the things you didn't do.

If I never do something, how can I regret that? Maybe I just don't have alot of things that I'd like to yet do.

If I never do something, how can I regret that? Maybe I just don't have alot of things that I'd like to yet do.

It's probably more the imagining of what you would have liked to have done that you can regret.

For instance of situations where things could have easily gone one way to a more pleasurable resolution or denouement or about experiences/situations that you know others have had. Or even just simply experiences that you have read about or seen in movies.

I know that in my younger days there were situations that could have ended up completely differently (and more pleasurably) had I but spoken a different sentence or two or had decided to do a seemingly small thing differently. There have been so many potentially diverging paths that I could have taken but didn't.