Crying - Spanking

Mashie what you have to say as usual goes right to the heart of the relationships we all hope to have and sometimes actually achieve. Its all about trust and respect. A safe word is a really fine idea but between two people who are really tuned into each other it is not needed. Getting tuned in . . . that is the whole magic and for those of us who have it it really is magic. It can be worked on and cultivated as you have. Three cheers, N & C.

My parents was a firm believer that a good spanking must be considered well done only when the spanked brat was not just only with tears in his eyes. Only crying intensive after a at least one minute or so in pure stinging pain - was considered enough to stop the punishment.

I suppose that stimulates learning how to be a better actor/actress. Being able to cry at will would then be a very useful trait.

Not that we were ever spanked in our household, but I know from experience that my sister can turn on the tears like turning on a faucet, at will, whenever it suits her to try and get her way ...

Being able to cry at will would then be a very useful trait.

Not that we were ever spanked in our household, but I know from experience that my sister can turn on the tears like turning on a faucet, at will, whenever it suits her to try and get her way ...

I was that sister too, lol. My brothers picked on me like crazy and called me brillo head because I had really curly hair. I used to punch myself in the arm or wherever until I got really red. Then I would muster up some fake tears and go and tattle one which ever brother deserved it in the moment. They would try to tell my mom that they didn't touch me but my mom would say something like, she had a red mark, you can't tell me you didn't touch her. Yes I was bad.

There is a commercial running on TV right now that cracks me up every single time. There has been a big push in this country lately to get back to nature, go visit the national parks, take the kids to the woods to explore etc. In one of those commercials there is this family with two kids, a girl and a boy. They are in the back seat and dad is taking them to a nature park I would guess. The boy is probably 8 and the girl is still in a car seat so she is probably 4 maybe? Anyway she has her doll and she is leaning over towards here brother singing a really annoying song and bothering her brother with her little doll.

I laugh because I was that sister too lol.

Mashie

Do you guys feel the need to be spanked to tears every time you get spanked? What do you want from spanking?

It's a total turn on for me. I thought I was totally effed up in the head because I want my wife to cry when I spank her. It has to be the real deal panic and trying to cover her butt and all the leg kicking because the sting is unbearable. We don't do it a lot with her because she really doesn't like the spanking and the reactions are real but she will take one for the team so to speak because it really gets me off.

I would love a good spanking till I started crying..... I mean isn't that is what a spanking is given for maybe with a little figging going on.....

I recall crying before or after a spanking when I was a teen. This was not when it was just my father but when others were present as witness. I would be standing there, pants around my ankles and my private parts and bare bottom on display. I would start to cry as my father told me off. What a sight I must have been! Sometimes I would be teased - such a crybaby for an older boy. At the time these were my worst punishments (most embarassing), now they are the ones I recall and want to relive the most.

I would love to be lectured, then told I was going to get a spanking, have my bottom bared by the spanker and then put over their lap for a slow hard hand spanking until it caused me to cry and really feel cleansed. I don't remember being made to cry when spanked by my parents (although I did cry after being spanked at school a few times) but my dad spanked me once and three swats with his hand left me in tears. My mom says that I cried after she spanked me once and she felt so bad she never spanked me that hard again.

Well I always encourage my spankees to let the tears flow, after all, that's why they are over my knee in the first place and I am the same when I am being spanked. No sense in holding then back.

Elaine

I was never spanked when growing up, not by parents or busy-body relatives, nor by teachers in any of 5 different schools I've been to. I did do some some spanking games - play stuff - with my wife though.

But here is the thing: I am trying to imagine being brought to tears by an involuntary spanking, but I just cannot see it happening. If the pain got to be unbearable to any degree I think I would get very mad and angry and lash out at whoever was doing the spanking.

And if it was a play spanking, a voluntary spanking, I would probably get angry as well and just stop the whole thing right then and there - and most likely lose any desire for much of any kind of sex play afterwards.

So, I am wondering about talk of crying. In a voluntary play spanking the crying must surely be self-induced to a great degree, brought on by something else than mere physical sensations. It sounds to me to be a sort of self-induced ritual, brought on by following a prepared or remembered script that culminates in the desired outcome.

Or am I missing something?

Agracier, I believe your synopsis to be mostly correct. One of the main reasons why crying is so important to me is that if I cry it is because I trust you enough to cry. In my family crying was a big no no and you were constantly belittled if your eyes were watering. It is from this that I developed a big resiliency to crying and only open up when I have a deep trust with a person. It is more of the feeling of reaching that emotional closeness.

Agracier, I believe your synopsis to be mostly correct. One of the main reasons why crying is so important to me is that if I cry it is because I trust you enough to cry. In my family crying was a big no no and you were constantly belittled if your eyes were watering. It is from this that I developed a big resiliency to crying and only open up when I have a deep trust with a person. It is more of the feeling of reaching that emotional closeness.

I know. I was only spanked hard enough to cause me to cry twice in my life (at home anyway). My dad spanked me once and spanked me really hard with his hand. I was crying by the time he was done, if not sooner. My mom on the other hand says that she spanked me once hard enough to cause me to cry and felt so bad about it that she never spanked me that hard again, no matter what I had done to deserve a spanking.

In my family crying was a big no no and you were constantly belittled if your eyes were watering. It is from this that I developed a big resiliency to crying and only open up when I have a deep trust with a person. It is more of the feeling of reaching that emotional closeness.

In my family too, when growing up, crying (from physical pain) was thought to be something weaklings did. My mother liked to tell stories of her childhood in the 1920s when there were no anesthetics if you went to a dentist, nor any if you fell on cobblestones and needed stitches to a profusely bleeding head. She used to say that her mother would threaten to give a few whacks if she cried, so my mother would really have something to cry about - a classic threat used throughout the ages no doubt ... ha ha.

Anyway, it had the desired effect. We never cried at the doctors or dentist because that was for crybabies, the same for falling off horses and breaking bones or falling off a bicycle and scraping your arms and legs into hamburger ...

All of which meaning that I doubt I could ever cry tears for anything like a spanking that went beyond pleasure. I might rage or curse or yell bloody murder if restrained, but really crying ... can't see it happening ...

I only cried once after a spanking. It was my very first, an OTK with 4 solid whaps from my 5th grade teacher over my pants. The spanking itself wasn't what made me cry, but the embarrassment of going back into the classroom knowing my classmates knew I'd been spanked.

My parents never spanked me, but at the ripe old age of 59 I now admit I would have been much better served by having my bottom bared and taking a few trips over my dad's knee than from all the talking they did.

I'm a switch, and I've had my share of stinging hits, but I've never been brought to tears. I hope one day I can remedy this situation.

I think crying is mostly mental, being sorry for what you did to receive the tanning, and the release of the guilt....all the emotion pouring out.

The best spanking are the ones where l am made to cry. I find it to be so cathartic where I can just let go and cry.

Like Ron said, it is really all mental, it is feeling comfortable enough with your partner to truly let go.

Do you need to make your recipient cry, to make spankings effective?

I am spanked by my wife often for behavior correction. It is usually over the chair in the bedroom. She pulls down my diaper and plastic pants to just below my cheeks, making for a god target. She then spanks me until I am crying and she feels I am sorry. She then pulls up my plastic pants keeping the diaper down. It really traps the heat. I am then sent to the corner to "compose myself". When she feels I am ready, I am allowed to pull my diaper up and go about my business. This usually happens about once a week. I love her very much.

I had a daddy/daughter relationship with a middle aged woman for over three years until she very sadly had cancer witch finally took her from me.

She was a complex person, had a troubled and abused childhood and some mental issues. She insisted the role play would be continual while we were together both in doors and out shopping, eating etc. and she kept a daily punishment book with her violations of my rules and regulations. She wanted to be severely punished for these and provided an assortment of canes, straps, paddles, floggers etc. for the purpose.

At first she complained I was not severe enough so over the first few months my routine evolved slowly increasing the severity until I didn't get any complaints, by this time I was finishing her punishment with 15 or 20 cane strokes given as hard as I could on her bare and already spanked and strapped bottom. This left her sobbing her heart out and I always felt guilty and cuddled her for half an hour till she calmed down. But this is what she wanted, she told me if it didn't bring her to real tears of pain she didn't feel as if she had been properly punished.

So for me it left me with a mixture of guilt and arousal.

I cry and bawl when my bare arse is spanked. can't help it.

For a spanking to be totally effective the spankee needs to shed tears. Spankings are for emotional stimulation as well as emotional relief. You have to tell the spanker what you want.

I think it goes without saying crying can be one of the hotter aspects of spanking, but also very underappreciated. I think some of that stems from the fact that many people's love of it comes from different places. Sadists, correct me if I am wrong, tend to derive pleasure by inducing tears, as sort of proof of method. For others such as myself, I like crying because it to me is a sign of trust and being comfortable enough to make yourself vulnerable.

I do not often cry, but it is best when it can happen for me it is a great release.

Every time when I got spankings I cried. I'm afraid of the pain, so when my bottom became red I would start crying. And most importantly, when I cried my spanker would caress my behind and comfort me, I like it.

Crying can be a form of stress relief. It lets the spanker know that he is being effective too.

Crying can be a form of stress relief. It lets the spanker know that he is being effective too.

I agree with @sundaybrunch. When one cries and demonstrates that she is submitting to the punishment, it provides a form of relief for the one being punished. It also helps to form a bond between she and her spanker. When one does not resist the pain and fight it, it usually leads to a shorter spanking with fewer after effects.

Yes, the spanking shouldn't be tolerable, unless that's what is agreed upon. Most of the time during a spanking, I want it to be over, am very humiliated, and have to struggle to get through the pain.

I cry, kick and struggle when smacked, this to me makes being smacked even more humiliating, but I've tried to just take it the past, but it never happens, it's like a automatic reaction to try and prevent it from happening, even though it never prevents it 😢

Donna

The crying aspect depends a lot on the woman being spanked for me. If she fights the spanking and has a tendency to cry, then I enjoy getting her to that point. If she only cries if she is in real pain, then I use that as a signal to back down the intensity. Many women want to be taken to where they can cry to relieve stress or absolve themselves of the guilt associated with wanting to be spanked. I enjoy the emotions of my partner and the crying aspect can be very sensual.