How long before you tell your partner your fetishes?

Just wondering how long it took you to tell your other half that you are you have an interest in this area and too see if they would like to join you?

Just talking about myself it took me quite a number of years to finally point blank say it and probably around a year or two to start suggesting things that are related to this area to see how she reacted.

Depends on the partner, i had one i told within 6 weeks and another who i never told. it's always a very hard thing to gauge someone's reaction to.

I'm thinking more and more early is better. On my first makeout with one girl, after i gently warmed her up with kissing and fondling her breasts through her shirt, I asked "Are you a bad girl? Do you like it when it hurts?" and she just nodded yes.

It took about a year but my partner frowned upon it.

Phew, that's a though question!

I actually haven't told my partner yet. We're married and all, but it's just too private I Think. I'm so afraid to tell about it, that I would rather keep it a secret!

It took a year after I first realized my interest to tell my wife and she was not happy with it. It took three years of gently talking about it to bring her around to letting me try a speculum on her. That was July and I am loving it every time she lets me exam her.

After 35 years of marriage, I can tell you that if I ever told my wife about this particular interest of mine, then all of the access to her doctor appointments and examinations that I currently enjoy would instantly disappear. Just a few months ago I had a natural opportunity to ask her about her first pelvic exam and she just about bit my head off thinking I was some kind of pervert (her words - not mine). So I will continue to enjoy this site solo and join her on her various visits to her doctors and describe some of the more memorable ones to my fellow members of this forum.

It took me about a week I think after I finally realized my feelings and desires had a name and that I wasn't the only one who felt this way. The husband was and still is a lot more versed in areas such as these, where as for me, porn, BDSM, fetishes and the like were all new. He didn't act surprised at all when I told him.

Mashie

I write medfet and clinic erotic stories as I have said on another place. I showed some of them to my wife a few years ago, but she - a professional nurse - told me the medicine is a very serious thing not serving for a fun. So I do not dare to tell her about my dreams and she does not know I am a member on this site.

Live as honestly as you can regarding your fetishes,for those partners that understand then that is a real bonus,sadly as we see here others are not as tolerant,always try to find that outlet of release for your sexuality if you are able to.

I envy those people who have a relationship that shares these areas we talk about,bottling them up just like not having sex can drive you crazy,find a solution.

F a fetish means a lot to you and you will be unhappy or resentful if you can not indulge in it, than it is best to get it out in the open pretty early on.

My attitude about sexual fetishes much like the old saying about masturbation. There are two kinds of people, those who do it and those who lie about doing it.

Everybody has their kink and if your kink means a lot to you, than you will be a lot happier in the long run finding someone who has at least some compatibility with it.

I think you should at least drop a few hints as soon as possible. Often you can be surprised by the person's interest. I've even used electro-sex on women during our First Dates (which are usually our first ever meeting). They were curious, and then elated when they found out how great it feels.

Around NYC most women seem to have never even heard of such a thing -- but they often do try it.

I know this is a subject that people have a lot of different opinions about. Anyway, here's my opinion. If your partner is really the one then they're not going to judge you or leave just because you have a sexual fetish. If this is the person that you're spending your life with then I would think that you'd be able to tell them anything. Personally, I don't participate in medfet play with those that are married and not open with their partner about their activities. I feel that it is cheating and I'm not going to help someone cheat on their partner. That said, if a couple is open about their sexuality and okay with each other's activities then I have no problem playing with that person. I have heard a lot of people say that their partner wouldn't understand but I think it wrong to rob them of the oppurtunity to try and understand. As for dating, I'll echo what others have said on this thread that earlier is probably better. For me, I'd say a few months into the relationship or so. My fetish is important enough to me however, that I'd prefer to meet my partner through the fetish sites so that I know we have that in common at least. Anyway, that's my two cents!

Patchcast I like how you said that you shouldn't be afraid to tell your partner your fetishes. I agree. Unfortunately I have not been able to tell my fiance about my newly developed fetishes. Actually I already asked for some insight on the best way to approach the situation of asking someone to try different experimental things. The sooner you tell your partner the better it is speaking from experience of being mainly intimidated or scared.

I personally haven't had any medfet fun yet but am willing to try some with my fiance.