Major turn-offs in the bedroom

Girls what is a major turn off in the bedroom for you .

im yet to find mine as when sex is offerd i take it as we dont live together .

and also he is lacking sex drive .

so come on what is it that treally turns you off . . . . guys answer too

This is an easy one for me to answer. The biggest turnoff for me, bar none, is a man that doesn't take my wants or needs into consideration. At the very least, I want to spend time with a man that takes as much joy in trying to please me as I take in pleasing him.

I went out with a guy many years ago that thought he was really good at giving oral sex. He wasn't. At that point in time, I had just embarked on a plan of letting my partner know what worked for me and what didn't, as opposed to just lying there being grateful for whatever I got.

I tried to show him what felt good to me, and when that didn't work, I tried telling him in as sexy and loving a way as I could. He just forged ahead - literally. I think he finally got the message when I literally fell asleep while his head was between my legs.

I am fortunate to have the ultimate turn-on; a partner that puts my needs first. We seem to have an ongoing competition (not the right word, but you get the idea) to see which of us can outdo the other when it comes to giving pleasure and making the fantasy come true. I can't imagine anything better than that.

Play On!

LadyDoc

The biggest turn-off for me is a bad attitude. I know that's a broad brush, but it can take many forms: bigotry, arrogance, ignorance - the list is long. I'm much more likely to be turned off by emotional and mental factors than anything physical. Though there are some obvious physical turn-offs, like bad breath and if he hasn't showered for a few days.

If he hasn't showered for a few days he wouldn't be in my bedroom let alone my bed!! 😄 Worst of all a lack of a sense of humour! Oh and cheesy dirty talk, if your going to talk dirty to me i really shouldn't be reduced to a fit of giggles by it!

Not showered for a few days, yuck. I feel bad if I don't shower twice a day. I don't want to hear about their oral care either.

I work with some of the biggest and baddest guys in the World here in the Oil Drilling Business. It surprises me at how they tone down their language now and show true respect to Ladies and their Wives when they are in our presence.

Typical guy talk in the shop or on the Drilling Floor but polite and respectful with the Ladies. Nice to see it has not been that way for long, it is the new Men making a difference with the Old Timers.

Big rough and tough Guys that say they are the bosses of their families. Yes and we all know they get their Wive's and Girlfriend's permission to say so. We know who really rules the roost in today's Men and Women's interactions.

Keep them toeing the line Ladies.

Certainly poor hygiene. But also I could never stand a guy who only thought of sex as a physical thing. Women like the physical, but also need the emotional side of sex to be truly pleased. We need foreplay to get us mentally warmed up.

You should know that these are the kind of postings I like to read most.

At the least they're educational to us menfolk. Though I hope we haven't been falling down too much on the job!

At their best they're reassuring when we know we comply in most, or hopefully all, respects.

But you should know also that there's another meaning to the word 'respect'. Every lady (OK every gent too) is deserving of our respect. And being respectful covers all of those things, cleanliness, thoughtfulness, consideration etc, etc.

And do you know gents - being respectful to your lady brings dividends! But you knew that already! Practice it!

More wise words from BigK -"Every lady (OK every gent too) is deserving of our respect."

Ms. Franklin had it right R-E-S-P-E-C-T , find out what it means to me.

Respect for each other and a good dose of the golden rule - you know, do unto others as....

hmmm.....especially interesting in a fetish relationship don't you think?

Turn offs: dirt, BO, bad breath, inconsiderate or not paying attention to me in bed.

(The Lily Allen song "Not Fair" comes to mind.)

I'm gonna have to go with everyone on this...hygiene and attitude! There is nothing that gets you out of the mood faster than someone with bad breath or BO! *Shudders*

How do you not know these things before the bedroom? Just curious.

How do you not know these things before the bedroom? Just curious.

I guess most times you do know course - but then if you did it wouldn't get to the bedroom or anywhere near.

I guess also though that should one have a sudden 'urge', a George Clooney moment perhaps, it might arise - at first carried away by a heady passion and then put off by a 'heady scent'!

And its not all BO related either - some contributors have spoken about attitudes in bed and those can change on a whim with some people. What has been a lovely day, leading hopefully to a loving conclusion in the bedroom can go bad too.

We can but do our best to find loving - and clean - bedfellows. I'm sure that even the most grubby and inconsiderate get the message eventually. You just have to hope they've got the message before you turn back YOUR sheets!

By far the major turn off for me is when I get a promise for something later, but then things happen and later turns into "not today". This doesn't always happen, but when it does, it's a real deal breaker! 😢

Red2qt, You sure hit the nail on the head there. It's strange how a whisper in your ear of what fun your going to have tonight...turns into I am really tired tonight...lets wait until morning...and we all know what doesn't happen in the morning either.

Yeah, and as I get older I really hate to waste a great time (Good thing Cialis has a long response time) 😁

Dear red2qt,

Did you ever get so turned off that you "took matters into your own hand"?

Gulp!

Lack of attention to my needs, along with other things said above. Make me feel horny, wanted, loved.

Ya, I suppose it makes most of us feel that way,but still,got to keep that mind on track or things won't work! You gals don't really have that problem.

I agree with the above.l However I have to add one more A guy that leaves his socks on. Don't ask me why it just turns me off in a heartbeat.

I know it's silly, but I just can't help it it just seem so distracting to me I guess me being anal his more than one meaning lol

Ok - not a MAJOR turn-off - but listen to irme fellas and

take your socks off! 😃

Attitude is a major turn off for me, sure i like a bit of arrogance but when it gets to the point where the guy is a complete idiot about it.

1. lack of personal cleanliness. I adore beards and body hair on a guy, but they have to be CLEAN.

2. a smelly mess in the bedroom due to lack of adequate prep, as in enemas, etc. I have a white bedroom, and I like it to remain clean, which is why do my enemas exclusively in the bathroom.

3. a man I don't know well who tells me he knows what I want better than I do. It *may* be true, but he has to prove it, not just drop it like a bomb at the table. Fail.

4. I am getting more adventurous, but I still need a little warning if my partner is going to do something completely different (for you Monty Python fans). I'm not much for surprises, it makes me profoundly uneasy and it stops me cold. That goes for sensual pain stimuli as well as surprise/unannounced visits. I can eventually get with the first, HATE the latter.

I have to agree with happygal. No unannounced visits (yikes!) I make that clear from the start. But my #1 turn off is a guy who thinks that we all want it fast and hard. Don't get me wrong, it has it's place but variety is a good thing too.

I have to agree with the ladys on their turn offs. #1 be clean, #2 please her FIRST . Nothing turns me on more than to make sure that the lady has her needs and wants taken care of first. Ladys, if a guy doesn't put your needs first, kick his butt out.

Another one to add to my list. Pubic hair caught in my throat! GAG GAG BLUGH! Hahahaha! That kills a mood right there!

Seems that the top of the list is bad hygene and a bad attitude. As for the "socks in bed" well, if they were worn all day I can understand!! However if they were "fresh" and worn along with other garments as an enticment to be "taken off" then the situation can get very interesting!! But that's another story.

Did I hear a "click!!"

highwater

Selfishness in a partner, a man who wants oral but refuses to give it that is a big turn off.

What man in his right mind would not be willing to give pleasure orally if his lady wants him to?

What man in his right mind would not be willing to give pleasure orally if his lady wants him to?

Oh dear, I could name a few...but uhhh we won't go there! 😁

Then those men are not in their right mind.

:-))