Domination and Humiliation

Do you think that Domination and Humiliation go hand in hand?

It certainly does with me. My g/f likes to dominate me and the humiliation is quite a big part of proving she's in charge and I have to just do as I'm told.

The humiliation can take various forms, but the most common is being naked in front of her friends - I'm also a member of the erotic clinic site where I've posted some accounts of being a patient in various intimate examinations.

Do you think that Domination and Humiliation go hand in hand?

It certainly does with me. My g/f likes to dominate me and the humiliation is quite a big part of proving she's in charge and I have to just do as I'm told.

The humiliation can take various forms, but the most common is being naked in front of her friends - I'm also a member of the erotic clinic site where I've posted some accounts of being a patient in various intimate examinations.

DEFINITELY NOT. Domination and humiliation DO NOT necessarily go hand in hand. Humiliation can be a tool in domination, but that is far from always the case.

There is MUCH more to domination than humiliation. Some S&M or B& D couples never engage in humiliation.

That they go hand in hand is only your experience with it.

Humiliation and Domination are two completely different things. I never have to humiliate my girls. They have been trained properly and know how to act. I do not need to parade them about in front of strangers to prove my Domination. If I'm displeased with one of them they will be properly discipline. Usually in private unless they are to be used as an example and then that is only done with closed group. I gain nothing from humiliating my girls. I gain their respect as well as their desire to serve me.

Domination has nothing to do with humiliation, while some submissives crave it others are mortified by it.

It is a question of personal preference of the people involved, both Dominant and submissive and should be discussed at the start like any other activity that may be engaged on

I don't think that domination and humilation always go together. One may like to be dominated without being humiliated...

And yet there are those that thrive because on the humiliation. Each Sub has his or her own unique buttons that they look to their master/mistress to provide them for their own enjoyment of the situation. I will never take a freshly striped sub out and have them try on clothes in front of a sales person. Not my thing. And in my city it can draw unwanted attention.

I hate being embarassed, even when it's by accident. Being humiliated, particularly on purpose, would be even worse. I was in YIM chat with someone from here who had been very nice and polite in the chat room. Long story short, he shredded me at the end, telling me all the reasons why he hadn't enjoyed our chat. What I thought was just a friendly get-to-know-you chat was an "interview" as he looked for a sub. And some of what he criticized me about I had said/done because of how he was running the conversation. I wouldn't say I was humiliated, but I was very embarrassed and hurt.

If my Dom has my trust and respect, I'll submit to Him willingly, even if something he instructs may cause some embarrassment. If He knows me and is looking out for me, He's not going to push me too far there. If He wants to embarrass and humiliate me, even when only the two of us know what's happening, He's not going to be my Dom.

Chester

Don't worry a bit about it and don't feel hurt. He is a louse and would be a horrible Dom.

A dom and sub should be equals in real life experiences. When you are in character for a scene, you can be equals or not depending on how the two of you want it to be.

Humilation is a form of play. Domination is executing control over another in a variety of ways. How the D/s relation ship is structured and how you play should be clearly negotiated and renegotiated as the relationship changes.

Not always. They go hand in hand sometimes, but not always.

Very interesting comments and I think it's all down to what we think of as humiliation.

My definition is probably quite tame, it's just being naked in front of her friends and serving them... They can touch, but I cannot. I'm exposed and a toy and that's humiliating. If I've been bad, then things are normally a bit worse, but that's my punishment.

There is a certain synergy where the amount of domination I exert over a submissive grows as she is forced to give up more and more of her modesty by completing humiliation exercises. I have found that frequent humiliation keeps a sub wet and horny.

I believe that must be cleared in advance to know how much of it we could possibly enjoy.I agree with Kate,and believe that the sub needs it,she or he knows how much can take,the dom has to guess correctly.Her example wearing clamps at work says it all.She was humiliated feeling afraid to be discovered and kept her discency in the same time.The plug adds more to those feelings.I know the mixed feelings from my experience when i was trained as a sub.I remember i asked myself to have the clothepins on nipples and the plugg as i was send for shopping.

I think domination and submission are more psychological, what tools are used to attain and maintain the submission vary from person to person. For some humiliation is very affective for others not so much. I don't think there is a one size fits all answer to this or much else when it comes to human relations....

Yes they go together, I find humiliation to be even more exciting that being dominated. When my wife does it to me in front of her male lovers, I get sooooo very excited and will do anything for them.

For me humiliation and domination go hand in hand. But that s my opinion which is based on the fact that humiliation is a major turn on when being submissive

I am new here, so please forgive any indiscretions on my part.

All of my experiences are "personal" ....no groups or others involved except for my elder at the time. They were more Discliplinarian than Dominant, but I don't know if there is any such "category"? And while what they did was discipline me, the humiliation came more from "inside of me" ...in other words, maybe she wasn't trying to humiliate me when she would make me pull down my panties to check for stains, it was me feeling humiliated that she had to do that because I had stained them before and it was my own loss of control or poor wiping that was to blame. The discipline came from her ordering me to lower my panties for a panty check, and then the requisite spanking if pee stains were found.

margo

I can only speak from my own experience. The first few years that we were married, my ex and I had vanilla relatiionship. She gradually became more and more vocal about her needs. We never discussed it, but it felt natural for me to cave in to her. I know that she enjoyed being in control of all aspects of our marriage. For me, domination and humiliation go hand in hand. She thought nothing of slapping me on the face in public if I questioned her. I would just bow my head as I felt an erection start. This lasted for 5 years until one day she announced that she had cuckolded me and was fucking her boss. I was humiliated and turned on at the same time. Maybe if we had discussed things it might have turned out better.

Personally, domination and humiliation are separate because of the difference in psychological benefits that transfer between Him and I. Within the lifestyle I believe it is possible that humiliation and domination can interact off of each other creating a sort of push-and-pulley (elaboration upon request) system.

For example: I get off on the pleasure of telling a woman how to serve my man, more often humiliation characterizes as a type of submission in my lifestyle because I consent to doing things that I am uncomfortable with in front of him. Overcoming my pride and self doubt by squating or crawling for him is a way to breaking me and it is a way to depict my trust before him. Humiliation varies and is often used in domination to prove, by example, one's gratitude.

Yes, my wife uses both on me.

Whenever a nurse makes me pull down my pants and bend over for an injection, she is being dominant and I feel humiliated.

Seems to me that domination is something that a top DOES, while humiliation is something that a sub FEELS. The two CAN go hand-in-hand, and this may be the ideal relationship (especially for the sub). But a real dom will likely do some things which are not particularly humiliating for the sub.

They are pretty closely related. Usually the humiliation is being made to do something kinky or humiliating or being made to reveal secret sex kinks and then humiliated for them. That's usually involves some form of domination.

I think it's the control you think you have although it really is the sub who is in control

It's a very similar thing, just backwards. The Dom gets their thrill through the power exchange, just like the sub. It's tough to describe to someone who doesn't get that thrill. It's like not understanding what the attraction is to pistachio ice cream is if you like chocolate.

It seems to me that the question of humiliation is a very subjective subject. For some subs the feeling of humiliation may go beyond there limits and be unacceptable. for myself i find that needing to overcome that feeling in orded to please my Dom gives me a sense of place and if i aquit myself well in the situation i get a feeling of pride and accomplishment . there is also the huge turn on of knowing that i am doing my best for my Dom and He is happy with my efforts and, depending on the situation, is turned on Himself by what I am doing at his insistance.

I like being dominated and humiliated but not in front of others. For example I would find it very humiliating to go out to a party with no knickers on or with a tongue on the wrong way . but no one at the party but me and hubby would know. Or going for a walk with a piece of sand paper in my knickers would be bad enough but if hubby where to suggest to stop for a drink and once I sat down he'd ask are you sitting comfy is something that would mortify me and yet turn me on beyond believe. I would call that public humiliation even though no one would guess what was meant.

My wife is always putting me in my place with her mouth and her rules.

Humiliation sub here. To me, domination is someone in complete control of your actions. Someone telling you what to do and in total control, no questions asked. Humiliation is the act of being embarrassed by some situation witnessed by another or others. If it happens in private without anyone seeing, it's not humiliation.

That said, humiliation can be used as a tool by a dominant to control or show control over a sub. I love the feeling of being humiliated, but I do not consider it an act of domination unless some one puts me in that situation or is in control of the action. For example, if I take an enema at home alone, it's pleasurable and I enjoy it. If a domme tells me to take it, it is a bit embarrassing having them administer and watching.

If the domme does it over the web via chat video or group viewing, that is domination and humiliation hand in hand. Same with masturbation or nudity. It depends on the situation and audience. Definitely two different things that can be combined for a much larger experience.

I would love to be dominated by young women dressed as nurses and doctors. Telling me what to do and taking charge of my body. If you have any suggestions how you would examine me, please reply .I'm interested on what will be done to me. .