I have a spouse who isn't remotely interested in enemas for fun. We have been married almost 46 years, and pretty much know what there is to know about each other. Yes, we have changed quite a lot in those years, but my pleasure in enemas has only grown. She quite placidly tolerates it now, but there was a time when it was a huge threat to her as a woman. "Aren't I enough to satisfy you?" was her question. I explained that although my pleasure was sexual, it was different to our sex life (which is good, even now). And I suggested she notice when she found my attentions to her especially exciting. It didn't take her long to discover that we usually had the best ever lovemaking after I had had an enema.
For the last few years she has had a bowel problem. It oozes without her being aware of it. We spent a fortune on gastroenterologist, scopes, the pill cam, the lot. Pill cam is where you get to swallow this camera that photographs the entire digestive tract and transmits its data to a wearable recorder via a harness you wear. When the pill emerges in the toilet you take the lot back to the lab. After that the doc gets to watch the MOST BORING movie ever, and charges you accordingly.
Anyway, all we got was broke. So now she takes an Imodium clone drug, and every time we go out, I give her a couple of squirts with a bulb syringe to ensure that at least we have a few hours before the rectum fills again. But she doesn't enjoy it at all, at all. So, nothing's perfect; but we'd be fools to let this spoil the great marriage we do have.
We get on just fine, and it has been like that ever since we learned to be open about what we needed and how we felt. Time was when she liked a pretty hard spanking. I could handle that! But it passed, and other things took it's place. Time was when I would ask her to put an inflatable toy in me as part of our lovemaking. It passed not because I stopped liking it, but because she began to find it unpleasant. And so on. Now we are both in our seventies; sex is much gentler and less demanding but still there to be enjoyed along with much else that life (and God) have given us.
I hear the frustration some of our younger members are having and I do understand it. Some of the hassles I have with my other half really ARE her fault. But a lot of them are mine; like not really coming clean about how I'm feeling; blaming her for it when I might have got her sympathy if I'd been more honest; hiding stuff I needn't and so on. Sometimes I've been scared to press for how she's really feeling in case I couldn't handle it (what if she rejected me?). Relationship has to be worked on every day, not just when things get out of kilter, and it's very like managing money: you must invest if you expect to draw interest. Don't put up with a lukewarm love affair. As the Aussies say, it's not worth a pincha shit, mate.