Making eye contact with your parent or chaperone while being examined

Did any of you ever do that, or were you too embarrassed? How did he or she respond when you looked at them?

At my first hernia exam when I was 13 turning 14, my dad was standing behind the doctor. My brother was behind me. He’d already been examined and the doctor had checked his balls and sick but no hernia exam. Anyway, I got hard and my dad and kind of made quick eye contact and my dad kind of snickered which to this day I don’t understand unless he was amused at how small and underdeveloped hair wise I was at that point. My hard cock still fit inside a toilet paper roll at that time!

I definitely remember a handful of times I made eye contact with a parent while I was being examined. I never had a non-family chaperone.

At my first hernia exam when I was 13 turning 14, my dad was standing behind the doctor. My brother was behind me. He’d already been examined and the doctor had checked his balls and sick but no hernia exam. Anyway, I got hard and my dad and kind of made quick eye contact and my dad kind of snickered which to this day I don’t understand unless he was amused at how small and underdeveloped hair wise I was at that point. My hard cock still fit inside a toilet paper roll at that time!

Reluctant- your dad snickering IS a rather odd reaction. Did he find it genuinely amusing, or do you think he was merely trying hide his own discomfort at that situation? What about your mom? If she ever attended your physicals, how did she react when you made eye contact with her?

I definitely remember a handful of times I made eye contact with a parent while I was being examined. I never had a non-family chaperone.

Jake- was it your mom or dad? How did each of them react? What was their most memorable reaction?

Yes, I looked over at my step mother once when I was around 13 and the pediatrician had removed my underwear and I thought she would be looking away, but she was sitting on the side against the wall watching my exam which made it more embarrassing. I never looked over again.

Yes, I looked over at my step mother once when I was around 13 and the pediatrician had removed my underwear and I thought she would be looking away, but she was sitting on the side against the wall watching my exam which made it more embarrassing. I never looked over again.

Was she smiling, frowning, or totally nonchalant about the whole thing?

My mother attended all of my physical exams from birth through the end of high school. My second pediatrician, from 6th grade through 12th grade, always had me remove my underwear right at the start of the exam and I was naked start to finish (not uncommon back then). My mother closely watched everything that he did and I would look at her as she was watching my penis and testicle exams. I found it rather exciting.

At the end of 12th grade my father took me to his doctor for my pre-college physical exam. My father's doctor was a retired Army doctor (lots of those around back then) and as I was undressing before the doctor came into the room my father told me to strip down naked because this was to be "a man's physical exam". I did not avoid eye contact with my father who, like my mother, closely watched the examination, although it was more casual in some ways because my father knew the doctor.

If you are going to have a parent in the room with you, you might as well make the best of it.

I had to have physical at 11 for camp. My mom went back. For the first time I was told to take off everything but my underwear, I was extremely shy as is so this was already embarrassing. I knew nothing of hernia and genital exams. So we got to the end and he tells me to stand up. Then tells me he needs to check my plumbing, confused I looked at both of them. He says pull down your underwear, I looked at my mom I’m sure beet red and she just gave me the look like do as told. I lowered them and was in clear view of both of them, my mom looked at my penis the whole time. I was mortified and couldn’t wait to cover back up.

Once we moved I had a female pediatrician and she had her nurse there during the physical. It was still embarrassing but the nurse always was reassuring if we looked at each other.

I never made eye contact with my mother when she was in the room. I was always too embarrassed

All through childhood when I had my regular exams every 2 months age 7 - 15; mum was always in the room. She was sat only a couple of feet away looking at me all the time. It was impossible not to make eye contact with her. Was always excruciatingly embarrassing when the genital exam took place and I was rigidly erect & leaking precum 😳. Even more so when I then ejaculated as my penis & foreskin were manipulated..

Prior to my teens, I don't recall eye contact, probably because my mom would stay seated in the chair at the end of the exam table.

But at 13, at the end of my exam, the doctor decided to do a skin check for scarring, ostensibly because I'd had pityriasis rosea a few months earlier, for which my mom had taken me to another doctor when my pediatrician was unavailable. For this, my mom stood and watched, as the doctor had me lying on my back on the table, while he removed my underpants completely for the first time since I was a baby. In retrospect, I realized that this was more about my having not yet started puberty at 13. But even then I don't recall registering their concern at all.

From that year on, instead of staying seated, when the doctor would say it's time to check the plumbing, my mom would stand up to watch as the doctor pulled my undies down to mid thigh for what felt like an extended genital exam. At 14 was the first time he said the words "late bloomer," and not knowing what that meant, I definitely noticed the concern on my mom's face for the remainder of the exam. But she never made eye contact with me. She just watched the doctor as he palpated my testicles and penis. I also heard it in her voice when the doctor said I had just started puberty, and she asked how he could tell, for which he brought out the orchidometer and showed her my testicles matched the bead with the 5 printed on it, which meant puberty had started.

At my exam at 15, I was searching both their faces for an indication of concern even before the doctor pulled down my undies. I guess my testicles had grown quite a bit, such that the orchidometer did not come out again. That year, my mom's questions as she watched my genital exam were about how dark my skin had gotten and when my penis (she said "peepee" but the doctor was professional and used the word "penis") would start growing. He reassured her that it had started getting longer but was hidden by the fat pad from my putting on so much weight that year. Again, she made no eye contact with me.

At my final exam with that pediatrician at 16, as soon as the doctor asked me to lie back on the table, I was watching his face to see if he still was concerned. When he said it was time to check the plumbing, and my mom stood up to watch, I definitely was looking to see her reaction when the doctor showed her my penis and testicles for the first time in a year. Finally, she seemed relieved, as I had done a lot of growing in that last year, including slimming back down. But as usual, she was not making eye contact with me, instead paying attention to my genital exam. When the doctor asked me when I had started ejaculating, and I said a few months earlier, they both looked satisfied, and he said I had caught up. For the first time, the nerves melted away, and I wasn't worried. The doctor then proceeded with palpating my testicles, and for the first time, without the severe anxiety of being a late bloomer, my penis started to stiffen. By the time he finished palpating my penis, I was fully erect. The doctor quickly pulled my undies back up over my erection, and only then did my mom make eye contact with me and smile reassuringly.

It sounds like what started out as a concerning situation turned into a bonding moment between the two of you.

I was very nervous during my childhood annual physicals. Both my mom and dad were present during my exam. They would both maintain a level of eye contact out of interest (I had some health issues) and as a way to offer reassurance and comfort. Dad gave me a reassuring thumbs up. My mom is a RN so there was definitely a clinical interest as well. I had a very good and caring pediatrician so getting examined by her got easier as the years passed. I started going solo at age 14.

It sounds like what started out as a concerning situation turned into a bonding moment between the two of you.

@ILuvLadyDocs Tell me what you mean.

Growing up in the 70’s-80’s we had most of our regular exams carried out by our old family doc at home. As RT was standard in our household we were often exposed to other family members or the doctor itself during the exams. We were ordered to be completely naked. Temperature was taken in front of the doctor by mom and waiting for the register often had eye contact with her or the doc. In some occasions aunty also was present. I did not find this embarrassing.

However entering to pre-teen age the standard exam protocol was extended with genital, hernia and rectal exams. Those came with more exposure and some cases I remember when incidentally my sister popped in or aunty arrived, they just ended up in the middle of my exam having the most intimate part of the process. That was embarrassing as most of the time I had erections already, but definitely helped to develop this fetish. I cannot recall similar experience in clinical and/or hospital environment. There were other humiliating facts.

One time when I was pretty young I was along for one of my older brother's physicals for camp or something that did not involve me. I was sitting at the end of the room next to our dad. The doctor had worked on my brother with him in just in his underpants for a bit and my brother had been kind of relaxed and would occasionally look over at us with a goofy grin. And then very matter-of-factly said, "take your underpants off, Danny." My brother lost the grin totally and he looked over at my dad, maybe for confirmation that he should do it, but once they were off, he got really serious and totally avoided looking our direction until it came time for the turn and cough part and he looked right at dad again.

@ILuvLadyDocs Tell me what you mean.

In the middle of something that was quite concerning for both your mom and the doc, the momentary eye contact with your mom must have been comforting and reassuring, and cemented the mutual trust between the two of you.

I don’t remember anything like that. My parents were never present during my childhood medical exams, which never involved removing clothes, or having my private parts examined, with the exception of a hernia exam. I feel sorry for children and teens who had their privacy unnecessarily violated, because the nurse or doctor was an arrogant control freak.

I don’t remember anything like that. My parents were never present during my childhood medical exams, which never involved removing clothes, or having my private parts examined, with the exception of a hernia exam. I feel sorry for children and teens who had their privacy unnecessarily violated, because the nurse or doctor was an arrogant control freak.

That's a rather extreme take. Now- consider the alternative. What if that same child or teenager develops terminal cancer because the warning signs were missed, all because a proper exam was never done?

Your privacy or your life- which one is more important?

I recall many times laying undies a half off with the doctor checking the plumbing. While looking over st my mother looking back at me. I think it was a start of me medfet.

Long, long, long ago as a kid, my dad took me to the doctor because I had a rash between my legs (it was eczema - I was prone to awful skin rashes growing up - only once I was an adult did I realize I was allergic to scented detergents). I would have preferred my mom take me but she must have been busy that day. I was still young enough that they didn't ask the parent to wait out in the waiting room during the appointment.

I remember being really curious about everything before we saw the doctor and found the stirrups in the table. I asked what these were and was given an awkward non-answer from him. Doctor came in, went over everything and then announced she needed to take a peek at the rash. She pulled out the table extender and had me assume the "frog legs" position and took a look. Mind you! I was completely clothed. She literally just lifted up the waistband of my pants to quick look at the rash. But oh my god, in that moment I was absolutely puddle on the floor mortified. I didn't want my dad to see me like this but then we made eye contact and I knew right then and there that was the last time I'd ever, EVER have a parent accompany me to the doctor. It felt like one of the most embarrassing moments of my life at that point and it wasn't even anything that crazy or intimate.

Years later, and I actually just wrote a story about this earlier this week, in a much more adult exam, I was asked about having a med student observe. I have no problem with this and kind of enjoy allowing it when it's offered since I'm honestly not sure how many women there are in the world who are comfortable having a student observe their gynecological exams. I'm all about education, I guess. It, unexpectedly, ended up being a very uncomfortable appointment for me... Made more so by the fact that every time tried to make eye contact with this poor med student they would give me the *most* uncomfortable withering, pitying look in response. I do think it was some personal issue they had with being witness to my exam, but it was incredibly awkward and discomforting for me and it's something that's stuck with me years after the incident.

OMG never looked at my mom. No no no.

But now, if I had a chaperone, mmmm yes I’d love for her to look me in the eyes at certain moments of the exam. 😳

I guess I was about nine, we had moved and this was my first check up with the new doctor. We heard our name called and the nurse es or Ted us to an exam room. She asked my mom a bunch of questions about my health history and mom gave her my immunization record. She looked it over and said I needed some boosters. That scared me because I really hated shots. Mom just held my hand. The nurse told mom to set me undressed and she would be back. So mom proceeded to strip me down to my boxers which was our normal routine. When the nurse came back and saw me sitting there in my shorts, she said " go ahead and take off your underwear." This surprised me and I was embarrassed but I stood up but hesitated to take off my shorts. I looked at my mom a d she smiled and gave me a nod so I unsnapped my shorts and let them fall off. When I handed them to her she gave me a wink. That made me feel more at ease. As the exam proceeded, I kept looking at mom who would give me a little nod. I was used to the genital exam but never naked before hand. Having mom to reassure me helped a lot. On the way home mom asked me how I felt about being naked in front of the nurse and doctor and I told her I was scared at first but it really wasn't so bad. Mom made me feel that it was a normal thing and nothing to be embarrassed about. After that I was more comfortable with me IAH visits.

Definitely made eye contact with my younger brother when we were getting our checkups. I would go first and watched him nervously sitting on my dads lap

...But oh my god, in that moment I was absolutely puddle on the floor mortified. I didn't want my dad to see me like this but then we made eye contact and I knew right then and there that was the last time I'd ever, EVER have a parent accompany me to the doctor. It felt like one of the most embarrassing moments of my life...

I utterly related to your post. I posted before about having pretty nasty "straddle injury" as a girl which had a few check ups weeks down the line and really having mom and dad there the dr and nurse with myself being bare bottom half legs open is the first time sense of modesty and real embarrassment came over me. Catching eye contact really gave me sense of situation.

As a child I had an examination in which my parents were present and they both watched as the doctor went under my underwear to examine my penis. I was red with shame.

I don't think I made a habit of it but from time to time would glance at my mom who was inevitably the chaperone with me growing up. I do remember having a somewhat surprise first pelvic exam and making direct eye contact with her I guess questioning look as my expression and she gave a reassuring look back; nothing said but I knew what her look meant and it helped me relaxed.

I guess it's good to make eye contact from time to time, make sure she was looking more at my face and less at what the doctor was doing.

I have shared a similar unspoken look of reassurance as a mother myself.

I tried not to look at my mom, but at some point our eyes usually made contact. She paid very close attention to what the doctor was doing to me.

I think all of our moms watched. To some extent, or fully engaged, they did watch. And the thoughts and feelings vary for each of us.

And while I didn't look at mom intentionally, at some point there would be eye contact. And during the more intimate parts of the examination, I was either looking straight ahead or staring up at the ceiling, avoiding eye contact with the Doctor or mom.

Interesting