Prostate Exam proposition

@JamesUK.

I do hope you choose to continue. Some folks, like me, are not totally responsive, but that doesn't mean we lack interest.

@DocTemplar Thats cool but the whole point of me starting this thread was to get some feedback.

I'd say go for it. Sounds like a fair exchange.

Looking forward to hearing how it went.

Been following this and waiting for the rest especially your part of the exam.

@JamesUK This thread has 125 posts. That is a lot of interest and interaction. I think the audience is here and eager to listen and engage. All we are waiting for now is the story to be told. Please continue with the play-by-play report of what happened. The more you tell us the more we will inquire about specifics and discuss. On the other hand, if you only wanted encouragement before the visit, and you don’t want to share about it afterwards just say so. We don’t want to push you to share more than you are comfortable with. You can ask admin to lock this thread if you don’t want to continue with it.

Looking for the update on you..its been a while

Just an observation - because I know a lot of people have commented on this thread. I think the people that commented were being honest and trying to help or curious. I recognize that some are regular members on this board.

But, to me it unfolds like a long drawn out story. In my mind I question the veracity of a most of the content by the OP. I think this should have been in the blog or story section.

Just an observation - because I know a lot of people have commented on this thread. I think the people that commented were being honest and trying to help or curious. I recognize that some are regular members on this board.

But, to me it unfolds like a long drawn out story. In my mind I question the veracity of a most of the content by the OP. I think this should have been in the blog or story section.

There are many fantasy posts that elicit comments and discussion. You don’t get that in a blog or a story. I think this thread is fine as is, whether fact or fantasy. It’s drawn a lot of discussion.

I would instantly volunteer for a couple of my friends to give me a prostate exam!

I am extremely interested!! If you want to share I would love to read more. Sometimes I go a while without going on Zity or being very active on here. Again I say I would jump at the chance to do this; let this person study my prostate. As I said I would love to be in this situation you are in. And anxious to hear more if you want to share. I've been following this thread for a while.

Thats very easy to say @Patient4doctor when you arent the one who has to actually have it all done for real.

For someone like me who previously had absolutely no experience of having anything medical lremotely like that done before or, to be honest really had any idea what to "actually" expect on the day as the description of what I was expected to have done for this "deal" was pretty vague, it was extremely nerve wracking especially once I was changed and I was sat waiting for my "turn" in the clinic. in just a cold nylon material open backed gown and slippers and not at all pleasant if I'm honest.

When will you be posting your exam? Looking forward to hearing how through it was and what you thought of it.

All these replies and no response! I trust nothing abnormal was discovered that might otherwise account for the silence. On the other hand, if your seeking more fantasy play, just ask as this is a very accommodating site.

To be honest @Nick321 it’s posts like yours suggesting I’m lying about this experience or making it up that make me reluctant to share about it in public here as opposed to in private messages as pots like yours really do make me feel like this isn’t a safe space to share and better understand and make sense of my experience, which was my original reason for coming here.

For someone like me who previously had absolutely no experience of having anything medical remotely like that done before or, to be honest really had any idea what to "actually" expect on the day as the description of what I was expected to have done for this "deal" was pretty vague, it was extremely nerve wracking especially once I was changed and I was sat waiting for my "turn" in the clinic. in just a cold nylon material open backed gown and slippers and not at all pleasant if I'm honest

Hi James, Sounds Interesting. You mention several times that you have no experience of anything like this and taking the plunge and doing it made you very nervous., so I can fully understand that you were very reluctant, probably even a little scared about what was to come if you agreed to take your wife's deal.

I'm also thinking that perhaps your wife, as well as really wanting to help her friend out with a subject by persuading you to do it, as a lot of men, except those on here ! lol, would be very reluctant to volunteer for something like this, maybe she also thought you having a good thorough examination, perhaps even specifically of that area, was maybe long overdue and this opportunity to ensure you had it done would also ultimately be reassuring for both of you as well especially if your wife was aware you wouldn't normally be keen on having such examinations done.

You mention her and her friend being very vague about the exact details of what would actually be required during the exam, and as I say a lot of men would be anxious about having something like this done and I'm guessing maybe you were noticeably anxious when they were talking about it, so do you think they were maybe deliberately vague about the exact details so that it wouldn't scare you off from agreeing ?

Of course I suppose it's also possible that exactly what procedures you would need done on the day might have depended on the results of your initial examinations ?

I know most men I know (again save those on here) are a bit reluctant to have anything done anywhere, even in the bedroom, that involves any sort of anal penetration so that may also have been one of the reasons they weren't very specific about exactly what you'd need to have done at the exam, but with that in mind I say well done for doing it.

This place is a bit different in that respect and I'm certain those people who have said they would have loved to swap places with you genuinely would have loved to, but I also understand that for the average guy in the street, like yourself, it was a totally different and much less appealing situation to find yourself faced with having an examination like this in order to please your wife and for her to then do the things she had promised you in return for helping her friend out as a subject for her study.

I also found your description of the gown they asked you to wear quite interesting as I've had paper and cloth but never one that felt like nylon. The paper ones are really nasty so I'd say any other type is definitely an improvement on those ones.

You have mentioned her deal being the reason you agreed but I also suspect you also felt a little pressured by her to say yes both to have your wife do the things in her deal for you and also because I'm pretty sure your wife probably also made it quite clear in a lot of ways 😉 that she would REALLY like you to agree and say yes to her proposition. I know I would if it were my partner and I wanted him to agree to do something like this

Some interesting points there @Clarissa_Jane.

I was certainly very nervous and apprehensive about having it done and also a little spooked by how keen my wife seemed to be to have me agree to volunteering for it. She seemed unusually keen in truth, even allowing for her wanting to help out her friend who was struggling to get enough volunteers. So yes, she made it very obvious from the start that she REALLY wanted me to sign on the dotted line and agree to do it as you said.

I also really had the feeling there was maybe a bit more to it all than just helping her friend out and that there was very possibly "more" going on behind the scenes between her and her friend Claire than I was being told about, and that did also seem to pan out after Jane had finally got me to agree and sign up for the study and then soon after I’d done that, Jane then almost immediately started trying to presuade me to agree to having a couple of extra “optional” things done as well that Claire had apparently just suggested to her and would be really helpful if I’d also agree to having those things done on the day of the exam. I suppose some of your suggestions might have been part of those things, like her also wanting me "thoroughly checked out " including those additional tests in addition to helping her friend out with another volunteer.

I did indeed feel under quite a lot of pressure to agree even though I was far from keen as my wife Jane made it clear she wails really like me to agree to doing it and was incredibly keen for me to agree as soon as possible so she could let Claire know and certainly did make that very clear to me.

Yeah, I was told right at the start that I'd be expected to allow Claire to carry out an external and internal ultrasound scan of my prostate and also have manual exam of it done as well, but beyond that vague description they were very vague with the details of exactly what would be involved in having those things done on the day.

Jane was especially vague about it and I also suspect had also asked Claire to keep the details to a minimum or just what in”needed to know” for whatever reasons, and when I did kind of ask questions Jane's replies were mostly along the lines of that she wasn't really 100 percent sure of the exact details but not to worry about it as I already knew what exams I'd be expected to have done and that I just needed to turn up on the day and try to just relax and Claire would guide me through everything I needed to do on the day of the exam, step by step to get everything she needed me to do done”.

Jane being so vague did make me wonder if they and especially Jane were being deliberately Vague about it for a reason, possibly as you've suggested if she thought too much detail about exactly how the "required" examinations would be done during the exam might put me off even more and possibly stop me agreeing to do it and so kept it vague so as not to spook me or put me off agreeing to have it done. That does kind of make a lot of sense in truth.

The gown was a white nylon one with 3 velcro fatening tabs at the back. It reminded me a lot of the same sort of material as the capes they use in a barbers shop. That kind of slippery nylon water resistant material.

Hi James, Thanks for your reply.

I’d be pretty certain that there was probably quite a bit of communication between your wife and her medical friend behind the scenes, probably even before your wife even mentioned her deal to you at all, as to how to best handle you and maximise the probability of you agreeing to be a volunteer and to having the examination. In truth I’d actually be more surprised if there hadn’t been considering how keen you said your wife was to get you to sign up for it , and I also suspect there was probably also, as you suspected, a fair bit of discussion between them as to how much, and exactly what information about exactly how everything would need to be done during the examination that it would be wise to tell you beforehand, so as to give them the absolute best chance of convincing you to say yes and not freaking you out with any unpleasant details before you agreed or prior to the day of the examination, which it almost certainly wouldn't have helped you to have known in advance anyway. That way they would also be ensuring you would be a lot more likely to say yes to signing up and allowing all the tests to be done, as if they knew you were going to find parts of the examination unpleasant or uncomfortable they maybe thought it best for you as well as them that you didn’t know or worry about that in advance.

I’d imagine your wife and her medical friend were probably chatting as us girls usually do, when her friend mentioned the study she was doing and how hard she was finding it to get enough suitable male volunteers and maybe explaining to your wife what sort of volunteers she would need and what things she needed the volunteers to be willing to have done.

I’d think after that and maybe a bit more discussion, that your wife then maybe said something along the lines of,

“What about my James, it’s been ages since he’s had a proper thorough medical check up and this would be a great opportunity, but to be honest he probably won't be all that keen to do it as he’s really reluctant and nervous about getting anything medical or uncomfortable done and he's never had anything like this involving his prostate done before either, but maybe if we introduce him slowly and gently to the idea of volunteering, and if I also try and give him the right incentives to persuade him to put his name forward in the form of a deal he will find it hard to refuse, and if we also ensure we both just tell him the basics about what he will need to have done during the examination without too much detail, and don’t overwhelm him with too much information beforehand from either of us about exactly how those things will actually be done during his examination, especially details about anything he might find a bit uncomfortable or embarrassing, then I think I can almost certainly persuade him and get him to sign up for it”.

I’d assume from experience that it probably went pretty much like that to be honest James, with them also discussing and agreeing in advance exactly what you were to be told and not told by either of them before the day of your examination. After that I’d imagine your wife then came to you soon afterwards and told you what she wanted you to agree to do and offered you her deal in return for your agreement.

I’m thinking their discussion very probably went very much like that James as you certainly come across as someone who is probably routinely nervous and apprehensive and reluctant about having anything medical like that done, and your wife would be well aware of that, and quite possibly also saw this as a potential opportunity to get you to finally get checked out medically. I’m sure she did it that way to help you, as it’s quite often best not to know too much about stuff like that in advance and then to spend the time leading up to it worrying yourself silly about it and maybe even allowing the nerves to make you back out of having it done as a result .

I suspect your wife and her medical friend thought you would find any unpleasantness and discomfort much easier to deal with if you only had to deal with it in the moment and didn’t know anything about it until you were actually in the clinic and actually experiencing it as nerves and tension from worry would have you tensed up from the start and you being tensed up like that could have made any discomfort you did experience feel much worse, so that way you’d only have to deal with the actual uncomfortable bit as opposed to also having to also deal with stressing and worrying about it for days or weeks before the examination and also during the start of the examination with you knowing it was coming, dreading it and being all tensed up wondering when the parts you were dreading were coming and then finding that part of the examination even more uncomfortable when it did come time for that to be done as a result of you being so tense. There is also the possibility that if they had told you every detail that there might have been parts of the examination you might have assumed were going to be really uncomfortable which when you didn't have any prior knowledge of, or time to overthink them ended up not being that uncomfortable or unpleasant at all.

If I’m being totally honest with you, I also suspect the optional additional tests you mentioned were probably always on the cards, and your name was probably always pencilled in to have them done as well. I’d be surprised if they weren't also discussed by your wife and her medical friend at their initial discussion about you being a volunteer, but as I’ve suggested above, again they probably felt little steps at a time were best and to concentrate on getting you past the first hurdle and to have already have signed up to have the core examination done first before they mentioned anything extra or optional, again not to panic or have you worrying about it.

I’ve never encountered a nylon cape like that but I do suppose it being a bit water resistant would make sense to have you wear for the sort of procedures you were about to be having done during your examination, where potentially both water and lubricant would be likely to be involved as I assume you were also given a clean out and well lubricated before any of the internal parts of your examination were carried out

Clarissa x

As I said @Clarissa_Jane . I’m pretty certain they were talking and scheming together behind my back, probably as you say for quite a while before me doing this exam had even been mentioned to me, I’d guess to pretty much ensure I did eventually agree to do it once Jane had worn me down and persuaded and bribed me to do it with her Deal.

I’m guessing that, as you suggested, they probably did also discuss and agree everything between them in advance as well as them probably agreeing on exactly what I’d be told and not told by both of them so that I’d get identical answers from both of them which I suspect would probably be the minimum they thought I needed to know about what the exam would actually entail and neither of them would give me any more detail than they had agreed I needed about how it would actually be done on the day to get me to agree to do it and not scare me off.

Very possibly as you say with the very best intentions and motives behind it, especially on Jane's part as,

Yes I didn’t probably get medical things checked out as often as I probably should have done.

I do still kind of think however that them doing it that way was a bit sneaky and Scheming of them !

Hi @JamesUK. But again if you are being totally honest with yourself, do you think that perhaps they perhaps NEEDED to be a bit sneaky and formulate a little harmless scheme behind your back in order to actually get you there for the examination on the day ?

Did they also perhaps need to ensure they were both going to tell you exactly he same thing's as a untied front in order not spook or panic you? I'm thinking from your previous post that if you are honest, they very probably did have to, along with your wife also using the leverage of her deal to sweeten the pot to a degree where you found it too good a deal and very hard to refuse, so they could actually ensure they had the best possible chance of getting you there to the clinic on the day of your examination, which would undoubtedly be their biggest hurdle. As once they had succeeded in actually there and had started getting you prepared for your examination, then it would be much less likely you'd actually back out once your preparations for the examination had started.

I'd say before you judge their motives and methods to harshly, sit down calmly and have an honest think to yourself about whether your experience at the clinic on the day of your examination, and during it , on the day would have been any better or worse if they had given you a little or even a lot more information beforehand ?

I think you should think a bit more about the reason WHY they did those things the way they did with them probably deciding on planning everything quietly behind your back, including them almost certainly deciding it was probably best keeping you a little in the dark due to your nervous nature because the truth is they probably did need to do things that way to get you there, as opposed to you concentrating on HOW they did it by planning it all behind your back.

As the end result is I assume you got through the exam right to the end, I assume possibly even agreeing to having some or all of the extra things suggested on the day done for the extra rewards, and also ended up getting thoroughly checked out, which would hopefully have given both you and your wife peace of mind about your health and as a bonus gave your wife's medical friend all the data she wanted from your examination.

I'd guess you were understandably probably left feeling a little embarrassed and probably also a bit uncomfortable by the end of your examination, but you survived it and I'm sure all that was pretty quickly forgotten as you enjoyed your rewards from your wife afterwards.

Hi @JamesUK i’m curious to know how you felt about the exam? How was it seeing Jane’s exam? Did Jane know when she asked you to participate that you were interested in seeing her exam?

I had a friend who had never felt a man's prostate, so I asked her if she would like to feel mine. She said yes I'd like to do that so I got her a glove and some lube and dropped my pants and bent over the coffee table. I gave her instructions on how to insert her finger and find my prostate. After a few minutes she pulled her finger out and thanked me and said she really enjoyed it.

I had a friend who had never felt a man's prostate, so I asked her if she would like to feel mine. She said yes I'd like to do that so I got her a glove and some lube and dropped my pants and bent over the coffee table. I gave her instructions on how to insert her finger and find my prostate. After a few minutes she pulled her finger out and thanked me and said she really enjoyed it.

Did you enjoy it? Compliment her?

Hi @iLied. To be honest I was extremely anxious and a bit terrified before it, especially on the day once they had made me change into just that little cold nylon gown that I wasn't expecting to have to change into and I was sat there waiting in the waiting room to be called through. I had never really had an similar kind of invasive exam like that done before so had really no real idea what to expect. I'd been told what tests I would be getting done, but to me with no previous experience, they were really just names to me really without me really having much idea what was actually going to be involved in them or how they would actually be done. The exam itself I found very embarrassing and I also found a lot of it was very different to what I was expecting, as in truth I had very little idea what to expect, and some of it was really quite uncomfortable and unpleasant but I'd also have to admit that there were a couple of interesting sensations during it which could have been very enjoyable under very different circumstances.

Jane's exam was very interesting as I'd always been curious about what actually went on during these "womens exams". Yeah, I'd mentioned to Jane a few times before that I was curious about the exams she got regularly so she made me being allowed to come and watch her having that one done part of her "deal" if I agreed to participate and have the exam done. to give me a bit of an extra incentive to say yes I guess.

Hi @JamesUK . I can understand that feeling. I guess we just don’t get those kind of exams to the same extent as women do? So for Jane it would have felt normal for her to do, whereas more alien for you. Did you take away things Jane could do with you in different circumstances from the exam?

It’s sweet then Jane offered to let you in on her exam experience. It does sound like Jane and Claire colluded to get you there, but it sounds like Jane was willing to do it so Claire could get her male volunteers. As someone else said, they probably just talked about it casually at first at least.

Has Jane offered any other exam experiences for you since?

@JamesUK Give us details. Details details please. Please describe the procedures that you had done and the ones you saw them do to your wife. And how each of the procedures felt. I want to hear exactly what they did and how they did it. Instruments used, sensations felt, how they did them, what they involved, what you saw, what you felt, all that. Walk us through it. We weren't there to see and experience it. Thanks.

Hi @iLied, Yeah, I definately think women are generally more used to and probably better at dealing with those sorts of intimate and invasive exams. and deal with having them much better than us men generally do.. Yes, we have explored some prostate play since my exam.

I'm pretty certain it was probably a very casual "what about my James" type discussion right at the start when Claire first mentioned to Jane about the study and her struggling to get enough volunteers, but I'm also pretty sure that after that they did a fair bit of scheming and planning about what they were going to tell me and also what they weren't going to tell me about it all so that they would have the best possible chance of talking me into signing up for it and also to actually get me in that clinic on the day of the exam without spooking me or scaring me off. I'm pretty sure they had discussed and agreed all that and probably more before I was told anything about it.

I think my wife Jane as well as wanting to help her friend out with a "volunteer" also saw it as a golden opportunity to "make" me get a thorough exam and have everything properly checked out when I couldn't really avoid it, as I have to admit to being one of those "it will be fine" type of people when it came to medical stuff in the past which I know has frustrated her a bit.

Yes, @iLied, my wife Jane is also very keen to persuade me to stay involved in the study for its full 5 year duration and have yearly exams so they can compare and study the results over an extended period of time which would mean another almost identical exam around the midldle of this year.

Hi @JamesUK. Yeah, I think Jane can help you with this one. But that’s good.

Yeah. But Jane did it for the right reasons to her.

Is Jane doing the study too? At least you know everything is fine down there. But it’s also useful for trying to catch prostate cancer, for example, earlier. Because at the moment it’s difficult to pick up early.

@Rigel I thanked her and told her how good it felt.

Hi @iLied "Yeah, I think Jane can help you with this one. But that’s good." Jane can help me with what one ?

"Yeah. But Jane did it for the right reasons to her." well i think she probably had at least a couple of different reasons, getting me checked out and helping her friend out and I'd say she was probably 50/50 on those reasons bieng the main one.

Is Jane doing the study too? Not that study obviously as she has no prostate but a different one, again to help her friend get enough volunteers for the study to run.

At least you know everything is fine down there. But it’s also useful for trying to catch prostate cancer, for example, earlier. Because at the moment it’s difficult to pick up early. Yes, I got an almost clean bill of health but also was also classed as "interesting" after they had all the data. Hence why they are so keen to convince me to continue on the study each year for the duration of the study.

Hi @JamesUK I just meant about that kind of exam, as she’s used to it.

Of course.

Yeah. Sorry, it wasn’t quite sure if she was also in a study that took place at the same time as yours.

That’s good.