A Nurse With A Sense Of Humor Really Helps

So how many here have received a hospital enema where the nurse inserted a little humor…..along with a tube up the necessary orifice… to break the ice of embarrassment? I was scared to death when my nurse named Amanda told me she needed to give me a cleansing enema the night before surgery. She was an attractive 30ish brunette, but I could tell she was experienced. And I had no hesitation letting her know how nervous I was because I'd never had an enema. I think she knew I was scared, but I learned this was the one woman in the entire hospital I'd be thankful for giving me the enema, instead of some other nurse doing it.

Amanda told me what was going to happen, which got me close to being in shock. Dear God, I never imagined they stuck a tube up your butthole, then put warm soapy water up there to make you poop. I figured a pill took care of that? Wrong! I so wanted to chicken out, but I knew I couldn't. Amanda looked at me in the most calm and casual way and said “This ain't my first rodeo cowboy, you have nothing to worry about."

Ten minutes later I was lying in somewhat of a fetal position on my left side with one leg bent. Amanda stuck a translucent pencil width tube up my butt for what felt like a mile, I winced a bit, but it was so lubed up it really wasn't all that bad. I felt a quick rush of warmth as the soapy water started filling my guts. What happened next put the icing on the cake. Amanda broke into her own comical version of a Bellamy Brothers song…………

“Let the suds flow, Like a Mountain Stream…..And let you butt show, the 500th I've seen…..And let you gut blow, into the latrine” ………..

About that time I almost lost my shit, literally and figuratively. Just 15 minutes earlier I was scared to death, and now the prettiest nurse in the ward was making me laugh through one of the most embarrassing medical procedures ever. The point did come to where I just couldn't take any more water and Amanda helped me up to the commode. Shit exploded out of me I swear I must've eaten 20 years earlier in the 3rd grade. It burned a little coming out. She told me if the surgery I was having was on my bowel tract, I'd have to have more enemas until nothing but water was coming out. Lucky for me I was having back surgery instead. They just wanted me to poop so I wouldn't need to immediately after my surgery. If I ever have to get a hospital enema again, I hope I'm lucky enough to have Amanda do it for me.

Wish we had the rest of those words. This is the place for them, for sure. And i would use them. Let's get "Mr. Wet" in here. If anyone knows them, he would for sure.

Here is his latest work:

https://en.zity.biz/index.php?mx=forum;ox=display;msg=1255570

A Nurse With A Sense Of Humor Really Helps

That is so true. I've been in the $1000 a night motel a few times in the past 2 years. Most of my nurses and their assistants have been wonderful. Most of them know me from my previous occupation or present one. They walk in and exclaim “I know you. I used to watch you fix my TV or you're the crossing guard”. Then they proceed to strip me naked for whatever they plan on doing to me. I have fun joking with them too. Today it's not at all like it was when I was 10 years old having my tonsils out. Back then they were more like concentration camp guards. A week ago I was being checked in for an overnight stay before a stress test. They had me hooked up for an ekg in the ER then up to the room. The nurse or her assistant were not there but some girl was to get me ready for the bed. She may have been the girl who empties the waste baskets for all I know. She said “pull down your pants” to stick on the pad that prevents bed sores. then said “you might as well take them off because I'm going to check you all over anyway”. I ended up standing there completely naked while she checked every square inch of me from the top of my head to the bottoms of my feet. Just the way she did it that didn't bother me at all. That's the first time they stripped me down for a thorough skin check before letting me get into the bed. I think it's like the valet parking guy does to your car before taking it so you can't blame them for any sores yo get.