Wine enemas and diet....?

I know there are at least 2 or 3 docs (real MD’s/DO’s, probably retired), 1 or 2 med students and at least a couple of nutritionists and probably a physiologist or 2 ….so, the question (answers welcome from anyone else who has reliable knowledge on the subject):

Generally, a 4-5 oz pour of wine (red or white, doesn’t seem to make a significant difference) has roughly 100 calories when consumed via the usual route (through the teeth and over the gums…you get the idea); I have read that when consumed per rectum (as in a wine enema, yo) it has NO caloric value. Is this true or is it BS? Inquiring minds (mostly mine) want to know for several reasons. First, using cheap white wine for an enema vs a much more expensive cab or chardonnay would significantly lower the liquor bill (and probably be much more enjoyable); secondly, much rather be on a wine enema diet than a Keto diet – or whatever – lol; third, I’m just plain curious and too lazy to do the research!! What say you?

Thanks for any (useful) input. (Humor counts as useful!)

Now…GO HANG A BAG!! (but answer the question first!!)