Spanking: pain vs humiliation

@John_D I am sure you will find volunteers here to take you up on your offer. 😉

When giving a spanking to a submissive or patient, I enjoy both the pain and humiliation. For me the spanking is part of some sort of ritual.

First of all letting the girl stand in front of me. Letting her remove all clothes that are preventing the spanking. I enjoy to lower or remove her panties myself. Telling her what she did wrong. Looking at her ass cheeks. Letting her bent over my knee. Then starting the spanking. Sometimes making her count outloud. Always looking at the work I did. Before making her stand in the corner with her red ass facing to me.

Both turn-on are necessary : the pain to feel, the pleasure it gives and the humiliation of that weird pleasure and craving. Also the context, the scolding, the submissive position I'm ordered to.

I love severe spanking or flogging because of masochistic needs, but also because it's humiliating to beg for it, and embarrassing to assure that it's really what I need…

For me it would need to be providing humiliation and a little pain to my patient but of course in a controlled environment with verbal agreement on limits.

Both. Having to bare my ass, especially over the knee where my (inevitably erect) cock will be between her legs, and having a red/bruised ass for a while.

I've been only slightly interested in having pain administered to me personally, the occasional swat on my ass is kind of nice. On the other hand My sub asks me to paddle the hell out of his ass. I really don't mind seeing it go from Flesh Tone to Pink, then Rosy Red and a couple of days later Black and Blue. And he is very appreciative of the attention. He feels it stems from early adolescence. For him it's probably Both Pain and Humiliations

I believe that humiliation is more important. Maybe it's because of my approach to spanking. When I spank a woman, I don't want to cause her much pain. However, I like it when it is a bit embarrassing for her.

In my childhood, when I was spanked, humiliation was worse for me than pain. Especially when I was older and I was ashamed of the very fact that I was so punished. I remember that moment when my mother told me that I was going to be spanked. I knew what would come next. The worst thing for me was getting ready for the spanking. When I was older I had to take off my pants and lower my panties down. It was very embarrassing and humiliating. Then I had to take the spanking position.

What is humiliating about a spanking is that a whipped person has to bare their buttocks. It is humiliating that he has to take a position in which the buttocks are well exposed. Finally, it is humiliating to see him show his pain.

Corporal punishment has always been a humiliation. The pain was important, but the humiliation more. It was no coincidence that this punishment was imposed on people standing lower in the social hierarchy.

Its not the pain or humiliation. For me it’s knowing I let Daddy down and he had to correct me with a spanking, that hurt the most, more then anything.

I think both if done right …

When I was a child I would tell the pain. As a teenager, the humiliation more than the pain. Now that I'm an adult, it's different for me. My wife and I have discussed my punishment for mistakes, and I have agreed that she may punish me. For example, if I get a speeding fine and I don't say anything, and my wife gets a letter, it's more pain than humiliation. With everyday things usually more humiliation.

Between around 13 or 14 till around 17 or 18 my Aunt when i would stay at her farm be it just 1 day or the entire summer she would always at the drop of a hat give me pretty brutal spankings naked no matter where be it out side or in the kitchen and i loved loved hating them so much and my only regret is when i was around 18 that i didn't move in and live there

Personally for me it’s a little bit of both the right mix of pain and humiliation add to the submission and control the spanker has.

In a bdsm situation for me at this point it’s the humiliation of being nude from the waist down and knowing the spanker can see that i’m turned on by it

As both a giver and receiver, I think it is a little of both but to different degrees and levels depending upon the situation and my moods at any given time…but always within the boundaries agreed upon beforehand.

Feeling the sting and wincing and then feeliing the heat and tingle and arousal. It's like a tour of sensations that gets better and better.

This is like asking me to compare apples with oranges. I love Granny Smith Apples and I love Sanguinello Blood Oranges, but I can't really choose a favorite, because you can't really compare an apple with an orange.

One of my favorite breakfasts is freshly squeezed Sanguinello Blood O.J. with a freshly baked Granny Smith Apple Danish. It's just not the same when I can't have both.

Likewise, if you had me undress privately, then lay on a bed with blanket over my whole body, with just a hole in the blanket (only big enough to expose my bare ass), and then you came into the room and tanned my ass with a leather strap, and then left the room with me still under the blanket and without having said a word to me, something would be missing! It might be an interesting experience the first time (experiencing only the pain), but it wouldn't be an experience that I would look forward to repeating.

Also, if you came into the room with a leather strap in your hands, and told me to undress in front of you, and then gave me a humbling lecture about my naughty misbehavior, and made me apologize to you (while I stood naked in front of you with an erection), then left the room without tanning my hide, something would be missing! This would sort of feel like foreplay only, with denial of orgasm. Again, this might be an interesting one-time experience, but ultimately less than totally satisfying.

I have similar feelings about being the disciplinarian. Silently walking into a room, tanning your butt through a hole in a blanket, and leaving, wouldn't be adequate. And, walking into the room with my strap in my hands, but only telling you to undress and stand naked for my lecture, then leaving without administering a whipping, would also be inadequate.

I'm a disciplinarian as well as a receiver of discipline occasionally. They both play important parts to experience. Pain and humiliation when in the context of getting spanked is like peanut butter and jelly to bread. They all are needed to make a pbj sandwich. Effective discipline spankings I think need both the pain and humiliation to make a spanking memorable enough to change one's behavior. 😳😭😖

Turn on in spanking for me is both the embarrassment of grrrirlfriend treating me like a brat because of disrespectful behaviour and the pain too. Being ‘taken hold of’ by the girl, who then pulls my trousers down and takes me across her knee… its sooooo embarrassing! Then, ‘a good talking to,’ explaining exactly why I'm in for a spanking, then the girl pulling my knickers down and giving me a really hot bottom, with her bare hand! She explains she's spanking me soundly, so I don't forget how embarrassing it is! And so I behave respectfully to her and all women in future! Later, she will get on top of me and my hot bum will be bounced off her mattress (or floor) as she gives me 'a good seeing to!' Girls who spank seem to like it on top, in bed (I don't argue - not often, anyway!)

For me, it has to be a combination of things that all work together. It is four things: anticipation, submissive, humiliation, and pain. But they all have to be just right like when you are cooking food.

The anticipation as you are told that you are going to get a spanking. You get the butterflies thinking about it during the day. The submission that you are being told that you are going to get a spanking. The submission of being told what to do during spanking. The humiliation that you are surrendering naked butt to someone. The humiliation if you cry during spanking. The pain to help release endorphins but not too much pain that you go numb. I like a little bit of sting but not too much that you go numb.

As I've just said in another thread, for me it's the whole experience. Obviously a spanking has to hurt a lot - no point doing it otherwise - and should be the main event. But it doesn't actually take that long to administer an effective sound spanking, so the who surrounding ritual is important too: the power exchange between the spanker and spankee, the shame, the awkwardness, the embarrassment etc. The last time I was punished, I had to stand with my hands on head, underwear by ankles being lectured on my failings. It was mortifyingly but, as embarrassing as it was standing showing all, my mind was also on the punishment to come.

Both, it's having the power over someone who just does what you want.

Both for me. There's certainly the humiliation inflicted on my sub just by virtue of having his/her exposed bottom over my lap . The pain factor appears as the sub begins to wriggle a bit as their bottom reddens. Tears really round out the pain part of the experience. I love finishing with a bit more humiliation by inserting my finger into their red ass and hold it there till the crying stops. Truth be told, that last part is a fantasy I've only experienced in reality twice.

I love both aspects! I love to be naughty 😈🍑👋

@chelle300, you naughty??? I couldn’t image such a thing 😈

. The biggest turn on for me is the humiliations being naked over someone else's lap with them spanking my naughty bare bottom is so embarrassing. I don't mind the pain, I use it for stress relief.

For me, it is a large mix of things. I don't like a lot of pain, but some is a lot of fun and I like the vulnerable feeling, and being submissive, how it makes me feel in ‘my place’.

Although it was painful but it was embarrassment which was more taunting for me. If I had a choice to get more spankings but without pulling pants and undies down or less spankings but with barre bottom, I would choose the first.