Trans members: Does therapy help during transitioning? (not seeking medical advice!)

I have a genuine question for other trans members.

I don't want to trigger anyone, but does therapy actually help in the process of transitioning or is it just a joke. My thought process is that a therapist helps you slowly come to the realization if you are trans or not. But some people say that they had terrible experiences with therapists and just went ahead with their transition.

By the way, I'm not asking for medical advice. I already have my own thoughts on therapy and am genuinely asking the opinions of other trans members.

Well, I'm gonna be honest: It's pretty hit or miss.

Now mind you, I'm from Germany so I have to have therapy to be allowed to transition.

Actual professionals in that field are few and far between. Thus far I had one experience with a therapist where I actually felt understood (in the trans center in Münster). My “full time” therapist is absolutely not equiped to handle trans Patients. So, if you are lucky and find the right therapist (like me in Münster) it can be the most relieving, amazing experience ever. If you don't, you spend about 10-20 hours in their office every year and just hope that they don't try to talk to you. You just start making jokes and not telling them anything.

So yeah, a bit hit or miss, but especially when you don't have support from family or friends, it's good to sometimes just tell someone everything and cry your eyes out when they can't judge you

I only had therapy after I already medically, legally and socially transitioned to male. A good therapist isn't trying to make you be cis or trans, just help you figure it out. I had to have multiple psych evaluations to prove I'm really trans even though I already was transitioning for two years.

I went to therapy mainly because it was mandatory to get the required letters of hormones and surgery.

Yes it was nice to talk about myself and being understood, but in general it's like gatekeeping.

Thrapy can be good for anyone, but the caveat is that you need to have a therapist who is a good match for you.

And more on topic in a lot of cases you need a letter from a therapist to even start certain stages of your transition, in those cases its not just helpful but mandatory, unfortunately this can also create a situation where the therapist is actually detrimental to the transition experience.

Thrapy can be good for anyone, but the caveat is that you need to have a therapist who is a good match for you.

How does one choose a therapist? What is the procedure?

Basicall you try going to one and they aren't a good match you try another.

Its not a formal process and its often complicated by the way insurance networks work in the USA, but the right therapist can help immensely and the wrong one can do untold damage, so its good to remember you have options.

@agracier going to a local support group is also a great help as others can advise you wich therapist, endocrinologist and or surgeon to choose out of their experience.

For myself, i had to “build” my own team of medical professionals, since there's no transgender health center.

Same for legal issues to change birth certificate, which i had to do in the Netherlands via a Dutch therapist over Skype sessions and with power of attorney.

Community knowledge is an invaluable resource.

I started out with self medication and eventually asked on craigslist where i could get the real hormones, not even knowing i needed blockers also.

Than i got a reply from a trans woman who invited me for lunch to talk about it. She quickly talked me out of it and took me too our local support group.

Then it was like “wow, so much info” and i went the right way. That was in 2015, i would have been dead if i didn't follow their advise.

I thought it was helpful enough. I saw a therapist before I transitioned, but not while I was actually, actively transitioning. I found going to a trans support group and making trans friends much more helpful than therapy. As others have said, it depends on the therapist.

After reading over my earlier reply i noticed i didn't mentioned my therapist. Yes i went to mental health therapists, but mainly to get the required approval/referral letters for the endocrinologist (hrt) and latter for my surgeon (GRS)

It's like gatekeeping…

Personally I will never transition , mainly because of my age .

My therapist is the only person who 100% knows I am trans ( MtF ) and talking with her does help the dysphoria .

It is still hard , my inner child is this young girl wanting and at times needing to blossom into a beautiful young lady .

However reality plays a hard fact that that can never become reality .

I dream and wish , and perhaps in another life , but would I ever remember this life ?

Or have I lived so many as a mis-gendered child of God ?

Dysphoria sucks , be well guys ,

T.

I live in San Francisco, maybe the most trans friendly city. From early childhood I wanted to wear girls' clothes and was able to wear lingerie secretly. As I matured I wore lingerie under business clothing. When I started wearing all women's clothing I took lessons in femininity 1A, got facial hair lasered off, took hormones and voice lessons to pass well. At one point in the process I wondered whether I was trans. I found a gender identity therapist (SF abounds in them). In just one session--quite longer than the usual 50 min) she showed me the differences between my psyche and a trans, mainly I have a stronger male identity that a female identity despite my public gender appearance. So I'm a cross dresser

What an important topic to bring attention to at this time. Therapy is in my view extremely important to allow an individual the space and time to address the path forward. It's not to give permission or to judge. The acceptance of transitioning is to embrace a life change process. It should in my view involve sincere conversation.