Even being really in pain due to a serious spanking or any other corrective measures, I don't necessarily cry. It happens as soon as I get deeply emotionally involved. When the right words, meaningful glances and sort of forgiving kindness are added to that display of dominance, it just hits differently.
Growing up I would cry because of a mix of deep embarrassment (shorts and underpants taken down even when quite old), some pain and a good telling off explaining why I was naughty, what was going to happen and depending on the situation how watchers were going to enjoy a naughty boy getting his just dues. I would think as an adult the words are very important, tapping into the inner child. Just a thought.I think it would be a very intimate and intense experience to actively try to recall and inhabit these sorts of feelings while being scolded and/or spanked by a caring spanker. It might even be helpful to pretend to cry, in the way that pretending to laugh can lead to laughter. Over time one might develop a strong enough association between the spanking ritual and tears that it would happen organically.
I agree with some of the comments here. Crying is not necessarily related to the severity of the punishment or how much it hurts. It is more of a cathartic emotional release. It is more likely to be stimulated by the whole context of the event than simply the physical act itself. Some disciplinarians maintain that they will ‘punish until there are tears’ but in reality they might just mean punish harder. Some ‘spankees’ will naturally cry more readily than others. Some will maintain a defence against crying, seeing it as some kind of weakness. Some may cry because they feel it is ‘expected’ or because it means the punishment may then be over. In any case, crying in itself is not a good indication of the effectiveness of a punishment and it just one indicator amongst others.
I agree with some of the comments here. Crying is not necessarily related to the severity of the punishment or how much it hurts. It is more of a cathartic emotional release. It is more likely to be stimulated by the whole context of the event than simply the physical act itself. Some disciplinarians maintain that they will ‘punish until there are tears’ but in reality they might just mean punish harder. Some ‘spankees’ will naturally cry more readily than others. Some will maintain a defence against crying, seeing it as some kind of weakness. Some may cry because they feel it is ‘expected’ or because it means the punishment may then be over. In any case, crying in itself is not a good indication of the effectiveness of a punishment and it just one indicator amongst others.I agree with these words. Everyone reacts differently. As a child, I rarely cried during a spanking, sometimes after a spanking. But it was normal for me to scream in pain. they were short shouts after the blows. when I was 11 years old I decided to be brave like the heroes of books and not scream while spanking. My mom stopped the spanking after three strokes. She figured out why I wasn't screaming. She explained to me that suppressing screams of pain is not good. It's not good for me because I suppress my emotions. It's also not good for her because she thinks she beats me too badly. She said my cries of pain were a signal that the spanking was working as it should.
when I was 11 years old I decided to be brave like the heroes of books and not scream while spanking. My mom stopped the spanking after three strokes. She figured out why I wasn't screaming.Good for you. Stand up to adults and show you are not easily cowed. Be a young Spartan.She explained to me that suppressing screams of pain is not good. It's not good for me because I suppress my emotions. It's also not good for her because she thinks she beats me too badly. She said my cries of pain were a signal that the spanking was working as it should.Now that is convoluted thinking on her part. She stops beating because you are not screaming as she wants/expects. But she does not stop because she is inflicting pain, but because you are not expressing your (proper) emotions (according to her).But what if your proper emotions were wanting to show stoicism and being impervious to pain? In other words to show you were able to act like your heroes.I say this indicates that parents often have no bloody at all on how to handle their children and have no idea what motivates children's behavior. It certainly doesn't seem to be spanking/hitting/beating.
If you are unable to cry naturally, you can try to use a tear-inducing stick, e.g. Kryolan Tear Stickhttps://narrativecosmetics.com/collections/theater/products/tear-stickhttps://us.kryolan.com/product/tear-stickhttps://www.amazon.com/Kryolan-Tear-Stick-3005-grams/dp/B01BO0TNSE
2x but the spankings were for real things deservedly warranted 🙄 spankings were given by my accountability coach
Good for you. Stand up to adults and show you are not easily cowed. Be a young Spartan.Now that is convoluted thinking on her part. She stops beating because you are not screaming as she wants/expects. But she does not stop because she is inflicting pain, but because you are not expressing your (proper) emotions (according to her). But what if your proper emotions were wanting to show stoicism and being impervious to pain? In other words to show you were able to act like your heroes.Perhaps my mother dictated how I should react. I think parents often prevent me from feeling like a hero during punishment. The child is to feel humiliated, but not heroic. The very form of spanking is humiliating (bare buttocks, passing over the knees).However, I admit that I felt relieved when I could scream. I was forced to show pain through shouts. As a child, I did not like corporal punishment. I felt fear when my mother decided that I should be spanked. This fear intensified as preparations for the spanking began. But the spanking itself was cathartic for me. After the spanking, the guilt disappeared.
Growing up receiving spankings I didn’t always cry from the spanking itself. Sometimes I would cry because I knew that if my stepdad found out that I would get another spanking (and it was hard because if I didn’t tell him and he found out some other way I’d get it worse for not being truthful). I’ve also cried at times out of embarrassment, like when getting spanked by adults or getting spanked when other could see it.
@ccm93 --- interesting observations you've made. Obviously you were spanked by your step-father and you said he'd spank you if he found out and it sounds like him finding out you'd been spanked by someone else?To your list I'd add crying because I was disappointed in myself, that I'd messed up so badly I was going to get spanked, or was getting it.Part of the above would be because I'd put my parents in the position they had to spank me and I knew how distressing this was to them and how disappointed them. I'd really feel badly to so disappoint them.
I was never spanked as a child, and other than some sweet swats on my bottom by a girlfriend I haven't actually been spanked as an adult. Not like I read about here.But it's something I'm thinking about more and more, that maybe with the right person and connection I would want it, over her lap, bare bottom... I'd already be so submissive at that point anyway. But I'm not sure how I would deal with the pain... although once in subspace it might be entirely different than I'm imagining.
@GraceT A spanking is not necessarily painful. One can hit in a way that's physically only unpleasant (not painful) but very embarrassing. Wouldn't you enjoy the embarrassment and submissiveness? Maybe you would enjoy a kind of feeling like a little girl spanked by momma, even if your mom did not spank you?
Try adding some insults or degradation or even worse dreaded truths being spoken to you. This sort of thing really hurts.
Yes, absolutely !!! - spankings are a form of punishment, and so they will be hurt and also painful !!!And when crying is involved, that will be a sign, that the message is delivered !!!!
@GraceTYes. Once you are in sub space your ability to handle the pain of the spanks will be greater than normal.I try to get my ladies into sub space before their bare bottom spankings. Once in sub space they can handle strong nipple play, larger dildos and even needle play in their labia, bottom and nipples.Get with your lady friend, discuss your desire to get to sub space and then bare your bottom, lie across her lap and let her tan you good.You should come out of sub space appreciative and horny. Then you can have your way with her!
I agree with those who suggest that tears are due to "smarter spanking rather than harder spanking." There used to be a subscription spanking site called "Marked Butts" with a youngish main spanker, Kyle I think. He spent the first half of each segment just talking with the to-be-spanked young lady. There were a few dozen of them, a few regulars but many fresh ones. There were larger bottoms and rounder, tighter bottoms. Compliant ones and surly ones. I'm sure they all got paid for their discomfort, and Kyle knew how to spank a butt...Hard! But he always started by telling the young women that "she could do better and didn't need to continue to feel guilty and less-than" because she had let someone down or continued to lie or steal or cheat. During the spanking she was told to think of all she felt guilty or inadequate about and to let it go as the spanking reached a crescendo and the tears flowed. It all seemed very effective and he had a nice technique. I downloaded dozens of the videos and continue to enjoy them. And of course the spankees always got aftercare with hugs and holding, tho usually finished up with corner time. Altogether quite nice but illustrative of the maxim that the psychological aspect of a thorough spanking may be the more important part.