I am Dom. I think we are all wired one way or another. I enjoy "doing things to" a woman, and expecting her compliance. OTOH, I am also very affectionate, so a sub never feels she can't "come down" in my arms, & sometimes cry for a while as she releases & relaxes...
I give a LOT of enemas, do medical fetish, anal play, impact play (have you ever had your external genitals whipped while you are "plugged?"), fisting, stretching, many times with the sub restrained so she's helpless, other times she is restrained by my commands, which, in many ways, I prefer.
I enjoy enemas and rectal stimulation as well, & it can be hard for the sub to process that she has to learn ME, and how to play with me while not "taking over" when that's not what I want. I tell her what I want, though, so she's not in the dark. The sub's role is to give her Master pleasure, and take her pleasure from obeying him. A good Dom will know how to give great intensity and pleasure to her as well as giving her the "no control" experience she needs when they play. If the sub needs / wants a specific thing, the Master should always listen, unless true harm will come to the submissive. He should reject that. For her part, the sub should expect to pleasure her Master as he likes, whether it's giving him pleasure by submitting to his desires and will, or by caring for him as he sees fit. Mutual acceptance is a huge part of this. In my experience, acceptance is actually THE key, if there's to be a relationship. If just occasional "play," that's more like "scratching an itch," and that can be a lot of fun.