Fetlife

Hi all,

I have had no real problems with Fetlife.

There is process that allows you to get vetted which does allow you to have some certainty with you you are talking to.

I have found that some users are just on one site others are on multiple sites.. its just that some users may not be on this site and therefore maybe missing out nice conversations.

Until you meet a member face to face you dont really know who your talking to on websites.

@bittersweet_tee

No not rude at all.

I was just trying to explain that things may not always appear as they are. I can say that in private conversations with the owner that he has always indicated to me a desire for a safe and good environment for everyone.

He is also bound by Canadian laws which differ from American laws when it comes to publicizing things.

I grant you the site is imperfect but it's not because of a lack of trying, the owner has made it a labor of love. He could have sold the site many times for a hefty profit but hasn't.

As for the new site, I wish them all the luck in the world, I think competition and consumer options are good things. My understanding is they have discovered along the way that building such a community is more difficult than they thought.

@masterkinkster please don’t dismiss my knowledge as surface. Because I can rant for hours with FACTs Your friend makes a considerable amount of money from Only Fans that is why they are on his site. Not to mention the traffic they generate and income from site support to watch video content. I have no objection to only fans' profiles or any other sex worker on Fet.

My point is your friend talks a good talk, however, those Community Members who are long-standing and respected, have pushed for Fet not to turn a blind eye or harbour profiles of convicted offenders and paedophiles or to their closed groups that they have with banned content.HAVE FACT found themselves with Lifetime Bans. The fact your friend finds it hard to even communicate or respond to female profiles with issues they take to support for help, speaks volumes about how seriously he takes site safety.

FACT your friend after 5 reports rape, countless reports of consent violations and abuse about a profile based in the South. The action he chose was to silence the 20 victims that posted their story, who did not out or hint to the profile. That profile who is 20 years older than he states took particular liking and made a beeline for Young Inexperienced Female subs. Sort to cut them off from the community and when that failed his large follower and popularity to intimidate or silence them. When asked what your friend and his site could do, various Heads of the Community asked for this profile NOT to be THE FIRST PROMOTED profile the site recommends to its users to Follow in the UK area Your friend refused. ??? Is that working for the good or best to promote a safe community??? No, it is not at all. It would be the very least a site owner could willing to do If he wanted to, but as he is your friend perhaps you might get the answer as to why a Site owner would willing to promote such a profile????

No that's not a surface issue of the site Lucky that I was not a female who was affected by this widespread incident. One of many I can recall of where I know personally of someone who has been affected. That is just in the UK alone. I also know personally of 2 people who have tried to work with the site owner to rid the site of predators and guess what, they found him not so willing to engage to promote a safer site.

What I will say to you as a Male Profile, it is easy for you to miss or not even beware of what a female goes through in Fet regularly and daily. Perhaps respectfully it is you that should look further than the surface of your own appearance on the site. Realise that respectfully you have no idea regardless of the frequency of chats you have with the site owner. Your biggest issue of OF does not qualify or come close to qualifing you to know.

I'm on it there and on it here. I got the best of both worlds.

I have been on Fetlife for years and find it pretty OK. Met a woman on there a few years ago who I ended up in a D/s relationship with for a while. If somebody is rude or negative (or has a dick pic as their profile picture), you simply press the 'block' button and they disappear from your life and cease to exist. Keep at it, and eventually, you'll only hear 'please' and 'thank you'... and endless loops of 'After you'... 'No, after you'.

As for the unwanted attention, if you're a woman, you may find yourself receiving a few hundred PMs a day from desperate guys.

.

And if you are a guy, you might just find yourself wondering if your 'send' button is broken, with your inbox remaining as deserted as a gym in January, two weeks after New Year's resolutions have been made.

I've been on FetlIfe for a long time. It is definitely a mixed experience. I've connected with some good playmates, and encountered some nasty folks as well. On the good side, I have been able to connect for dates on there. I've never gotten any dates from Zity.

I've been on FetlIfe for a long time. It is definitely a mixed experience. I've connected with some good playmates, and encountered some nasty folks as well. On the good side, I have been able to connect for dates on there. I've never gotten any dates from Zity.

I would say the same applies to me. That said, having been on there long enough, I have connected with a few people on common ground, and we got pretty deep into our fetishes in discussions. It's all a matter of finding the right people for you to connect with. Every once in a while, something can really resonate with someone else.

I tried it for a bit. I was not overly fond of the sort of people dominating the site so I left. No intention of returning.

I have been on there for about 10 years. Met some nice folks there with some that I'm still in contact with. The site is different than this but the two go together well.

I often use is and find it useful now and then, do find you have to be somewhat cautious of fake profiles, but the events that people organise have been helpful for me to meet new kinky people in the area.

I tried it for a bit. I was not overly fond of the sort of people dominating the site so I left. No intention of returning.

That was my experience as well @Bad_Princess . The site just didn't have the most encouraging members. They were mostly one handed repliers. Not what interested me at the time.

I tried it for about a year, didn't like the people and seemed hard to navigate around and find people with my interests, so just quit going there.

I am still on FetLife but I don't go there that often. It's appears to me that most of the women there are either professional dominatrixes, video queens, or are selling subscriptions to their Fans Only pages. The men there are similar to the ones here. There is little discussions of anything there.

The OF grab is extremely annoying, and as stated earlier, you do have to sort through the rift raft, which makes me drift further away. I enjoy opening up on Zity and feel this is much more genuine.

Fet life sucks, they had a group in idaho and looking for females to join this group. Well my partner got drawn in, and among other things, drugs and orgies. They are rude and they are select so if you don't fit the mold beware. I have not been there for 10 years. This site is much better. It has rules and it it is full of people you get to know about as well as you can if each of the people are open and honest.

Everything is only as good as the effort you put into it.

There are a ton of posers, but if you use it to find local like-minded people in your area it can work.

At least it worked extremely well for me. The legit people want to meet and play with others and the only way to do that is go to munches, socials, coffees.

There are posers everywhere, even on Zity. From the little experience I have with Fetlife, and from I’ve read about it, they don’t do as good a job moderating as Zity does. So more bad apples are tolerated there that would get culled out here.

@ssgrill77 What does "OF grab" mean?

I've been on there for several years. I find it entertaining.

Full disclosure, Fetlife is where we met 'Smith'

@Jacana O n l y f a n s

@ssgrill77 I've heard about that OF site, but how does it "grab" ?

@Jacana a lot of OF people have taken to using the site as advertising for their pay site material. Some people are angry about it, others don’t care, but the angry people are fairly vocal.

@Jacana an Only Fans grab is when someone posts a very short clip, like ten seconds long, to entice you and then state in the description that in order to view the entire video you have to join her OF.

@Jacana I've heard about that OF site, but how does it "grab" ?

The same way one can grab any and all sites on the web: by using screen recording software. Whatever appears on your screen, can always be recorded. There are dozens of such small programs. The only drawback is that the recording happens in real-time. There is no downloading as such, only recording.

All good and well for clips of a few minutes. But when recording longer vids, you will either need patience or else work with multiple screens. Record on one screen and go about other business on the other screens.

Cumbersome, but it works.

@UncleO @Nurse_Phillips I see. So, basically, people spam you with short videos advertising their OnlyFan account (to which, I assume, one gets access by paying a fee)?

@Jacana no not even. They post nudes of themselves and link to their OF accounts. Honestly I have no idea why people are upset about it. People there seem to be perpetually angry.

@Jacana

On Fetlife there are several ways to view posts by other people that you are not friends with. New posts and Popular (many Likes) posts. Your feed only shows you posts of people you friend or follow, so not spamming. Some members get riled up over what they consider Bait and Switch tactics of the commercial posters.

@UncleO @Nurse_Phillips I see. (I don't know FetLife - a friend of mine was on it but I never looked into it.) Thanks for the explanations!