Ever Had One of "Those" Days?

This morning when I got up I wasn't feeling real well. Nothing terrible, just not feeling good. I quickly realized that I was a little constipated, a little bloated, a little gassy. My wife was going out for a few hours. I told her that I was going to take an enema. She wished me luck as she left.

I got the bed ready with a pad and towels. Got the enema bags out. Filled the red, 2 qt. fountain syringe with warm water and sat down on the toilet to empty my rectum and lower colon. My first sign of "trouble". I only got about a cupful of water in. Expelled that and tried again. Again, only a cup or so of water in. Used up the entire bag that way. Each expulsion getting only a few small marbles out.

So, I thought, fill the combination syringe and try it on the bed. Again, only a cup or so in before I had to go. So, I used up that syringe full and went to refill both syringes. Got interrupted by the phone. Then the chatty neighbor dropped by. After she left I finally got both bags filled. I laid down and was able to get at least half a bag of soapy water in this time. I held it for about 10 minutes and expelled. Went back and finished that bag.

I tried taking the other bag of water and had the same result. After half a bag I decided that I needed to do something a bit more drastic. Got out the douche bulb I use for mineral oil enemas and got it and me ready. When the nozzle was hard to screw onto the bulb I thought I had better do this in the bathtub. Good thing I did. There was oil all over the place and I got, at best, 3 or 4 ozs. in me. Better than nothing I thought so I laid down and held it for 30 minutes or so.

Refilled the combination bag and tried again. This time I got almost the entire bag in. Held it for 15 minutes and expelled. I'm now resting a bit and and will take a good rinse later this evening. If I'm lucky I might even get my wife to give it to me.

Oh yeah, been there. It's worth it when you finally get things cleared out isn't it!

First:

No distractions! Turn that damn phone off! You don't have to be reachable 24/7 or if you do, pick a time when you are NOT on call

Warm but not hot to YOU the person getting the enema works best

Second:

Calm down!

Even if you have to just lie there staring at the ceiling for an hour, run around the block, play a round of solitaire, whatever works for you. part of that is to pee first so that there is no extra pressure on the lower abdomen

You want to hang the bag about 3ft above where your rectum is when you are in position.

Ideal flow rate I find to be around a quart per minute

Third

Find a position and STAY IN IT UNTIL IT' TIME TO RUN!

It can be knee-chest(Careful, NOT knee-neck) or Simms, or even "Fetal" but what's important is that you can relax an stay in it 15 minutes. Lie in that position for a minute or two before you insert

Fourth: Insert S-L-O-W-L-Y then once you are confident you have it all the way in an it is pointed towards the navel, take a couple more minutes to make sure you are relaxed.

Remember the 3 rules of enema taking at this point:

Take EVERY DROP you can

Hold it every second you physically can.

Stay in position til it's time to go

Take several deep breaths, as deep as you physically can, before you open the valve.

Then breathe in, hold your breath, open the valve, and breathe out. then breathe the way your body wants to.

Understand that there may or may not be mild pain during injection, Whether that happens or not, relax and let it flow. When you are SURE you're going to burst( you're NOT going to) then stop it, and retain as long as you can, ideally 15 minutes.

Hope your next one goes better!

Love Enemas

Lisa!

YES!!! I had an "incident" a few days ago. It was 3:30 a.m. and I didn't want to wake up my husband. I was so bloated and uncomfortable, I couldn't sleep.

I took my regular soapy enema but had to stop and expel after only a cup or so of water!!! It was painful and water started leaking out and I knew something wasn't right. When expelling, there was just liquid and no stool. I tried again with another enema and this time during the expulsion there were just a few hard, small stools and lots of gas!!!

I had to repeat the enemas about 3 times. (Lots of walking, massaging my stomach, twisting and bending.) For the third enema, I used some cold water. That sometimes makes my colon contract and it certainly did this time with a little more results. My bottom got so sore that I put Tucks in it and went back to sleep.

A couple of days later after taking Miralax, my expulsions were the "normal". Whew!!!

I took my regular soapy enema but had to stop and expel after only a cup or so of water!!! It was painful and water started leaking out and I knew something wasn't right. When expelling, there was just liquid and no stool. I tried again with another enema and this time during the expulsion there were just a few hard, small stools and lots of gas!!!

Cold water sometimes will make an enema come down. I think you should have probably done some oil to soften it first. When you just do mineral oil you don't have the urge to expel and can hold it for half an hour or more. It can make a mess of your equipment though so I recommend a can or a fleet type disposable they sell with mineral oil. I think you might install one of them under your bathroom sink for next time. Trust me, it will make it easier.

Good general advice by LisaK, but

Ideal flow rate I find to be around a quart per minute

Well, to me that seems already a little too fast - and I don't even suffer from constipation or hard stool. Whenever possible I take an enema after voiding my rectum naturally so I don't have any trouble filling to capacity. But sometimes already formed stool do pack within the folds of lower colon so this calls for extra patience and a bit of coaching - maybe this is what bmatt9119 was experiencing. Moreover l am not in favor of oil, be it mineral or vegetal: it's more a nuisance than a commodity. If I had to break masses I'd rather choose very warm water, maybe a weak soap solution if well tolerated and extra time lest an already distressed bowel can simply lock up thus limiting the volume that can be infused. However difficult times can and do happen sometimes under more ordinary circumstances: the stretch from sigmoid to splenic flexure can be bitchy. 😜 Just release, take a break, stretch, walk around and try again.

Just my 2¢.

Speaking for myself, I generally I set the regulator to little more than a trickle so I seldom need to change position from initial left Sims' I often choose to begin with, even less take a break. This way I can fully relax and enjoy the gradual distention. That makes for an average 15/20 minutes of uninterrupted flow and uneventful filling with about five more of retention and massage after closing the clamp, no need to make a dash to the commode either. (I even fell asleep three times during an enema, the first about fifteen years ago for maybe half a minute upon a particularly deep meditation session and the other two, later on, because I was a bit tired so I simply let that happen - before you ask I never had any mishaps.) 😃

[...] pointed towards the navel [...]

How strange. 😮 Although that's what I read around almost everywhere from nursing texts to alternative books as well as through informal advice, my own anatomy dictates the contrary i.e. first I must point the nozzle toward my codpiece then I gradually shift it around toward the navel before letting it fully slide in, but only after the tip reaches past inner sphincter. So I'm eager to ask, is anybody else built this way?

Yes. Over my lifetime I have had many, many enemas. Some necessary but most just because I wanted one. And yes, nine of ten will be just fine, but then with no obvious reason things just do not go as planned. Even plain warm water causes cramping that makes it difficult if not impossible to continue beyond a pint or quart. The only solution seems to be to let it out, wait a while, then try again if I have time.

I think anyone who has been into enemas for any length of time can relate to this topic. I know back in our teens when klismo sister Lisa and I took care of each other's "need" for a good enema, there were days when the enema just wouldn't go in. We never nailed down a reason for the problem, but finally just decided that when it happened, we would wait a few hours, or maybe until the next day, to try again. The next enema was the pleasant experience which we desired.

Yes. Over my lifetime I have had many, many enemas. Some necessary but most just because I wanted one. And yes, nine of ten will be just fine, but then with no obvious reason things just do not go as planned. Even plain warm water causes cramping that makes it difficult if not impossible to continue beyond a pint or quart. The only solution seems to be to let it out, wait a while, then try again if I have time.

I have found this to be true. Some days the bag just doesn't want to go in. I will try something else like a few toys then do another one and not push it. It will usually give the results I want. It might be a gas bubble or just a cantankerous colon. Never force it.

Recently I've found it hard - near impossible - to take very much volume. Even with a retention nozzle. Use to do 2-3 quarts very easily. It might be due to the fact that I have to fit them in at awkward times and I'm just not relaxed. Had a colonic a few weeks ago and she released it without my asking due to the pressure. Said I was doing fine and taking a lot in. Would prefer an e-nurse but that just isn't going to happen.

I can only remember having this problem a handful of times out of the thousands of times over the years that I've started an enema session. On those rare days when I had this problem, I think I used Cheryl77177's method to get things flowing--just continuing to try, getting a little more water inside me with each try, and gradually working up to my normal volume. LisaK's advice to relax is very important too. It's just personal preference, but I rather not retain an enema in this situation, but instead expel a disappointingly small enema immediately and start a new enema as soon as possible.

I've found Moms Egirl's recommendations also work for me. To get maximum expulsion, I too use abdominal massage in various body positions while relaxing and barely pushing with my internal muscles. Abdominal massage while standing works well for me too. I've found that walking and a little jumping also helps to get a sluggish expulsion going. The massage technique I repeatedly use to speed up a sluggish expulsion is to start at the beginning of my transverse colon, (upper right abdomen), and sweep out the path of my colon with my palm or my fist pushing down into my abdomen with a good bit of force to hopefully squeeze my colon. That massage path over my colon looks like a question mark. It goes from right to left across the top of my abdomen just below my ribs, then down the left side of my abdomen. Next it goes horizontally inward from my lower left abdomen to a point a couple inches below my bellybutton, and finally straight down from there to squeeze my rectum. This massage technique can expel surprising amounts of water and stool, usually in a slow steady stream or a series of small pulses, but sometimes with a sudden, surprising single gush of a good part of my colon's contents.

A little prevention with a good diet helps too. I went on a strict vegan diet once for three years. I never had this problem--not even once in those three years. I never got constipated or had any difficulty pooping, either with or without an enema. I'm now on a diet consisting mainly of vegetables and fish. I cut out wheat, beef, and most dairy products. I'm enjoying results very similar to my vegan diet.

Yes... DON'T just try and force the water in, take multiple enemas until it finally gets the block out. If you force it's going to feel very uncomfortable and often won't work well.

As the old rock n' roll song goes, "Mama said there would be days like this".

I recall on one occasion that I had been working under an unreal deadline. I stayed stressed out for the better part of a week. Once the project was delivered to the client, I welcomed some "me time" to relax. What better way than with a nice warm enema.

As I began the enema the urge to expel was almost immediate. I could not have taken more than 8 ounces of solution when I literally expelled the nozzle and the modest amount of solution I had taken right in my nest of towels. I was thoroughly disgusted!

After tossing the now wet towels in the tub and with fresh ones on my bathroom floor I started another abortive attempt to take an enema. This one wasn't messy, but totally unsatisfying after only a pint of solution.

By this time my solution was getting cold and I decided "what the hell" and topped the bag off with cold tap water. The third time proved to be the charm. The cool water created massive rumbling in my gut and almost at once the blockage cleared and I was able to take a couple of quarts.

When I moved to expel that enema, the explosive gas release that suddenly came had to have registered on the Richter Scale somewhere. It was earth shattering!

I opted to quit at this point. I was exhausted, plus I had a washing machine load of towels to launder!

Have fun and play safe!

Deb

Since I do enemas for pleasure and not to relieve constipation, I will typically do one or two enemas after I have had a BM. But on rare occasions, I have opted not to wait and just start my self indulgence without a pre BM. And I did notice right after the solution started to flow I had a powerful urge to expel. There was no way I could take this whole bag. So it resulted in at least two stop and starts to finish a 2 quart enema.

My enemas are most pleasurable when I can do a relaxing and slow fill and lie on the bathroom floor to retain the enema without really having the urge to make it to the toilet. And the only way I can do that is to at least cleared my rectum out with a regular BM.

Debgurl, I love your story of the earth shattering gas release on your third enema, which was a cold one. Moppys_jalopy says below that cold enemas get him out of a jam and start things flowing for him too. Maybe there's something to the cold enema theory. I always tried the hottest comfortable temperature in this situation, but a cold one right after a hot one might be best thing to get me up to my usual 3 to 4 quarts by my second or third enema.

I've had those massive gas explosions too, often when doing abdominal massage after a disappointingly small enema. I think gas explosions are fun! They're really loud. If I ever had a massive enema-induce gas explosion in a busy public restroom, I'd hear laughter and crude comments up and down the row of stalls.

Speaking of public restroom enemas, anybody ever do one? Handicap stalls sometimes have a sink you can use to fill your bag. Ever notice those hooks near the top of the door inside a bathroom stall? Maybe their purpose is to provide a place to hang your bag.

Recently, I awoke with deafness in my right ear. Ohhhh... No! I hope this dam isn't excrement! That would exacerbate my problem and make me a "S**t Head!" As it turned out, ear wax had blocked my right auditory canal so that sound could not get to my tympanic membrane. In stead of digging a new canal, I went to the local pharmacy and purchased a two ounce infant syringe. I then rushed home and took an enema in the opposite end from which you usually take an enema. They called that an, "irrigation!" I suppose that my right auditory canal has now become an irrigation canal!? This a true episode in my life and my hearing is now restored. However, my head is now water logged as evidenced by the way I wrote this post.

Have any of you had an experience such as this with ear wax?

Recently, I awoke with deafness in my right ear . . . . it turned out, ear wax had blocked my right auditory canal . . . . .Have any of you had an experience such as this with ear wax?

As music lovers, my husband and I very carefully use Q-Tips after our showers to dry and clean our ear canals. I know you aren't supposed to do that, but we have been doing it all our lives and still have intact tympanic membranes. At his physicals, my husband asks if his external auditory meatus is positively spotless, they always they say "yes", ask him why he asked, he tells them he's an audiophile, and they tell him to keep the Q-Tips out of the canals.

Have any of you had an experience such as this with ear wax?

Oh yeah. I guess I just get clogged up everywhere - colon, sinuses, ears. After several long and annoying sessions with the carboyl peroxide (if you wait too long the wax gets hard and the swab just pushes it further in), I've started just using one of those small bulbs to rinse my ears out with very warm water once or twice a month. Seems to work. Otherwise you can carefully use a cotton swab about as often. The key is not to put force on the tympanic membrane.

I've used Q-Tips all my life, just as my mother did when I was a child. I've never suffered any ill effects, and cleaning the auditory canal once weekly has kept wax buildup from occurring. I just say be careful not to push if you feel pain.

I get this all the time. I'll tense up I think

Today! Worst I've ever had!

Did my prep work, but NOTHING stayed in 15 minutes. I was not clear after the 5th 3-qt enema