Unexpected references to enemas

Outside of my kink and contacts I have had a few surprises with references to enemas by others,

The first, in about 1972, was in Watertown Square in Massachusetts, a monument on which someone had written, "No Soap, No Enema Without Soap." There were four of us in the car, and this prompted a very attractive young woman riding with us to tell about her childhood enemas. She didn't seem to have disliked them.

Another time, not much later, while waiting for a subway in Boston I overheard a couple talking about giving each other enemas when they got home.

And today, overheard in Portland, Maine, a mother talking about making a long trip with her kids. She was telling another mother that she gave the kids enemas before starting the drive and had cups for them to pee in so they didn't have to make any stops. The kids ranged in age from, I'm guessing, 3 to early teens. The other mom seemed Interested and ask how the kids reacted, the answer was, they didn't mind the enemas at all. I counted 6 kids evenly divided, 3 boys and 3 girls.

So I guess "enema moms" are still out there!

I was in Walmart a few months ago and there were two female employees stocking shelves by me as I was looking for an item. I overheard one tell the other that she had to give her son an enema the day before. Needless to say I strained to hear more but she didn't go into any details.

Reminds me of a conversation in my doctor's office. One morning I was standing at the reception's window when the nurse was talking with the receptionist about her husband, who was home sick. She was heading home for lunch and to give husband an enema.

While I was at CVS on Sunday at the drop off prescription counter . a woman about my age was at pick up prescription counter the usual large brown paper bag with the go-lytely prep in it for sure!!! I have got the same one a few times. The woman had handed the Pharmacy tech what looked like a prep instruction sheet. The tech said oh the Fleet bisacodyl tablets and enemas are in aisle 7 and said I will show you . of course I exited down that aisle but she was already at the front counter checking out.

Those unexpected references to enemas can sometimes really add some spice to a conversation or other interaction. One in particular came up while I was with friends awaiting a table at Buca de Beppo. There was a picture on the wall that had a caption to the effect, "Yes, an enema would be just the thing".

This triggered some story telling throughout dinner where many told of their own experiences. Several were in a clinical or hospital setting, and one told of his mother's obsession with the enema bag, or "bottle" as he called it.

Most seemed to express an extreme aversion to the procedure. I kept my own experience(s) pretty tame and general. Having been through a variety of medical interventions at the time, I merely indicated that I didn't find them as horrible as the others. Having had tubes and instruments inserted in most, if not all of my body cavities, I explained that the enemas were the least objectionable and provided much needed relief at the time.

I would fill in at my father’s drug stores during peak times or when he was short of help, during my high school and college years. During those times, I heard customers say some of the darndest things. Some of the ones that I can remember are as follows:

An elderly lady approached the register with 12 bars of Kirk’s Castile Soap. As I was ringing up her purchase, she exclaimed. “You can’t find castile soap anymore. Although Ivory will do in a pinch, castile soap is the best soap for enemas!” I thought to myself you and my mom ought to get together.

I was ringing up the purchase of a nicely dressed gentleman; under various sundry items was a Rexall Open Top Family Syringe. As I rang the syringe up, he exclaimed. “It’s for my wife.” I felt like asking, “Does she know you’re no wearing your wedding ring?”

Perhaps the best, although it’s not about enemas is this one. An extremely attractive girl, who was two classes behind me in high school, put down a box of Cupid’s Quiver, which was advertised as not only scented but also flavored douche. She asked point blank. “Does this stuff really work?” I paraphrased a line from a popular hair coloring ad. “Only your lover will know for sure.”

Since I got so many likes with my last post regarding occurrences that I encountered while working in my dad’s pharmacies, I thought that I would share some more with you. A couple more examples are as follows:

1) I was returning some items to the shelf when a woman in I would say in her 30’s asked if I would help her. She said that she wanted to buy this family syringe pointing to a Rexall Defender open top family syringe but she wanted the nozzle of a Barium Disposable Kit and asked if it was possible to purchase the nozzle separately. I’m talking about a semi flexible nozzle with a bulbous tip. I told her that we do carry a semi flexible nozzle in our warehouse (We offered a delivery service to clinics, nursing homes, hospitals as well as homes so we had products that we sold but didn’t carry in our stores.). I suggested that she purchase the syringe and we would deliver the nozzle to her home. She agreed to my proposal; however, she, needless, elaborated, that she preferred to use a longer nozzle for enemas and had tried the vaginal nozzle or pipes but they weren’t as flexible enough.

2) I had just completed my third year in college and was filling in on a June Saturday for a sick employee. A girl that was two years behind me in high school and I knew was getting married for my family was invited to the wedding, approached the register with her mother and her aunt. The girl’s mother was carrying a Travel Syringe. She paid for the purchase saying to her daughter. “You’re all set now.” The daughter retorted. “Now if I just knew what to do with it.” The aunt added with a feminine giggle. “There is only one place where it will go.” All three chuckled. I wanted to say but didn’t, “Not really!”

3) Again I was at the register; a woman who was a friend of mother’s entered the store and a little hard of hearing so she talked several decibels louder than most. Upon seeing me, she made a bee line to me and asked I am sure in her mind discreetly. “Dee, where are you enema bags?” Then she put her hand over her mouth in what I assume she thought was a whisper but wasn’t added, “Mine sprung a leak last night.” Anyone close to the registers could hear her.

This happened last month, and is the wildest bit of luck I've ever heard of, much less been involved in. I had mentioned to a friend in chat on another site that my admin was leaving, and she said a friend's daughter had just lost her job and was looking. I asked her to pass my name and number along. The next day, the woman called and identified herself. After a short qualifying phone conversation, I asked her to come in for an interview. She showed up on time, a well dressed Hispanic woman of 30. I had failed to clear Zity off my screen before bringing her in my office. She ignored the screen as long as she could before saying, "Please don't get this wrong, but I must ask about your interest in enemas." I stammered a bit, and asked why. "Because my mom gave me enemas growing up, and I miss getting them." I told her about my early enemas, and she asked if I would let her give them to me. I said certainly, and would be very pleased to give to her also. I hired her on the spot, and so far, she's been the best admin ever!

Lately I watched the movie about Howard Hughes and in it, after his plane accident the scene is in his hospital room full of reporters when an orderly comes in with a full red enema bag with the hose and black nozzle and says, "It is time for your enema, Mr. Hughes." to which he says, "You aren't going to do it." He pointed to one of his office workers and says, "Give it to him. I trust him." or something like that.

I was off for the Veteran's Day holiday and was asked by my wife if I would take her mother to the podiatrist for an appointment. Alternatively, she said I could skip the trip and cut her toenails myself - I could not get the car keys quick enough! My mother-in-law is 90 - a bit deaf, but still pretty sharp. The drive to the medical arts building is about a half hour and we had a vanilla conversation on the way - weather, the kids, the job, and such.

After her appointment was over I told her I needed to stop in one of the other offices where my gastro guy has his practice. I told her I had been notified I was overdue for my colonoscopy and would finally schedule an appointment. Back in the car she chimed in, "Do you have to take enemas for that test? My (late) husband had a colonoscopy and I had to give him a bunch of enemas. He was really cleaned out, I can tell you!" I told her that these days you drink a gallon of horrid stuff that tastes like sewage and it cleans your system completely. No more enemas unless you are still passing solids the morning of the test. She replied that the drink sounded really bad! I agreed.

A couple of minutes passed as we drove on and out of the blue she said, "My daughter says she gives you enemas for ulcers. I never heard of that." Although taken aback by this - and the idea that my wife would share such personal stuff - I replied, "Mom, I don't have ulcers, I have IBS - Irritable Bowel Syndrome - and on occasion I do need an enema to relieve the symptoms. Its a pretty common ailment, but its not ulcers." I could not believe we were discussing enemas - we had never had any conversations more in depth than the weather or car problems! I can count on one hand the number of times I have been alone with the woman in forty years and this was entirely surprising!

Then she says, "You know, I had to give my girl enemas growing up. She'd get a tummy ache and I'd fill up that bag with soapy water and fix her right up! The doctor always said to keep her bowels open." Holy crap! My M-I-L was telling me stories that I never knew!! I casually asked, "Oh, did that happen a lot?" (My wife had told me she had only very rarely received an enema while growing up - not like my own family where they were common.) Mom replied, "Oh, now and again, but sometimes the bag wasn't even dry and put away before we were back in the bathroom for another go. She wasn't very happy about them, but I could always tell when she needed one. Sometimes I think we nearly wore that bag out! She tells me now she can tell when you need one too - maybe she inherited that from me!!"

I told her it doesn't happen much but baking soda in an enema is about the only thing that helps my IBS unless I took prescription drugs - and I don't like the side effects of the IBS drugs. Then I tried to steer the conversation back to my wife and her experiences and I asked if she finally outgrew her tummy problems. (By the time we were dating, I never knew her to be sick.) Mom said, "Oh, about eleven or twelve or so she stopped telling me if she was sick to her stomach. I guess she was too embarrassed to have me give her enemas, especially if her father was home. She was pretty shy about it. She had some real problems when she came back from Chile I can tell you!" (She had gone to Chile for a semester in High School at 16 as an exchange student) Mom said, "She picked up some bug in that place and it gave her terrific cramps and stomach problems. I thought she would end up in the hospital. I told her an enema might help and she actually let me give her a few. She finally had to take antibiotics to shake the bug though."

Too soon the ride was over, but it certainly was one of the most unexpected conversations I had ever had. I learned a lot about why my wife really does not like enemas.

I should elaborate a bit; when first married, my bride had to undergo an IVP which required a clear bowel. At that time the prep was a clear diet for a day prior,castor oil the night before the test, and two enemas the morning of the test. Upon returning from the doctor visit where the test was ordered my bride said, "Well, I have to have enemas for this test, so I guess we need to buy an enema bag." On our next shopping day we did indeed purchase a Davol combination syringe. When the day of the test came up my bride complained bitterly that she had to take these enemas - one soapsuds and one clear - and that she was not sure how to do it. I offered to help and was soundly rejected. She told me then that she had had few enemas from her mother as a child, and didn't remember much more than she disliked them and they were embarrassing and gross! She has only taken a couple more since then - when pregnant.

So now I am unsure what to make of what my M-I-L told me. It would seem her history was much more extensive, but it also turned her off to any further enemas as an adult. Perhaps I can broach the subject - someday.

Recently, I was talking with a co-worker about a client that has been a literal pain in the butt. She turned to me and said in the sweetest way, "he's so full of sh_t, if they gave him an enema, they could bury him in a matchbox"!

I just about died laughing at her reference to the client and how an enema could solve a lingering "problem" we've experienced!

I'm sure many of you know a person like that, too!

Have a great day!

Deb

"he's so full of sh_t, if they gave him an enema, they could bury him in a matchbox"!

Priceless!!! 😄

Priceless!!! 😄

Thank you, @gwhap! It's a great line and I can think of any number of people to whom it applies!

Deb

My American female boss once said, referring to someone who didn't want to do their job: "...and sometimes you have to have an enema! We all have to do things we don't like sometimes". Enemas being rather uncommon in my country, I was completely baffled at the time. I coughed involuntarily and we moved on with the conversation.

Is this a common figure of speech in the US?

"he's so full of sh_t, if they gave him an enema, they could bury him in a matchbox"!

@Debgurl I saw another post using that same phrase on Texans. A little search on the internet attributes a quote (don't know if he made it up or just used it) by Christopher Hitchens about Jerry Falwell: "If you gave Falwell an enema, you could bury him in a matchbox."

Hitchens was an English-American author, columnist, "and a chain-smoking, atheistic, foul-mouthed, British drunken smartarse — what every self-respecting gentleman aspires to be! Hitchens was a self-identified antitheist and was known as one of the "Four Horsemen" in the New Atheist movement (along with Dawkins, Dennett, and Harris)."

Youtube has some videos if you google his name.

@gwhap, Thank you for the reference to the origins of that little "quip"! I'd had never heard it before my co-worker uttered it and, now, I think I've used it a half dozen times since!

Have a great day!

Deb

I'd had never heard it before my co-worker uttered it and, now, I think I've used it a half dozen times since!

Yup! It is now a fixture in my toolbox! 😄

We second graders, most age 7, were just bac from our winter break when our somewhat prim asked each of us to stand and say ho we had spnt the time. Wh en her turn came, Vivian said , "I wasi sick and my mother had to give me an enema." There were a few giggles , but the teacher got flustered and said "We don't talk about such things in school." But in the ear;ly 1950s enemas were a fact of life.

Many years ago when my daughter was little we were waiting for her school bus one morning. One of my neighbors was also waiting with her son who had been home sick from school for a couple of days. I asked how he was doing and she replied, "He's fine now. I just had to give him a good enema on Monday and that really helped." I think I responding saying something like "yes, kids do need that from time to time." That was the end of the conversation.

This was back in the 1970s, I was standing in line in front of the movie theater trying to get tickets for Star Wars. I overheard a conversation from somebody next to me in line. He's kind of an older hippie dude talking to some really hot girl oh, and he was talking about how Fresno is the asshole of California. He said that if you were to give California and enema, you would have to stick the syringe in Fresno

Bakersfield was the armpit

Heard the same thing about Fargo ND. Both are probably true!

We watched "Fried Green Tomatoes" on TV the other night and Jessica Tandy - who is a resident in a nursing home - was telling Kathy Bates that they had given her a Fleet enema and she asked if Kathy had ever had a Fleet enema. At the commercial, my bride said out of the blue, "I gave Fleets to the patients when I was in the County Home, suppositories too, sometimes."

I was naturally curious and asked about it. She had worked as a nurses aid two summers in the County old folks home (more correctly the long-term care facility) after her junior and senior years in high school. We were a pair even then and the stories she related at the time were more to do with feeding patients, cleaning bedpans, brushing teeth or dentures, and other non-medical tasks. She never told me she administered enemas.

I asked how they let a 17 or 18 year old perform invasive procedures and she said, the nurses were so overworked that they delegated some of the more personal care jobs to girls they thought were mature enough to perform them. The nursing staff would track BM's and if a patient went two days without, she would give a suppository. If that didn't work in a couple of hours she would give a Fleet. If still no results, the nurses would administer a soapsuds enema while she assisted. Her patients were mainly very old women, but occasionally she was on the men's ward. Although she had a younger brother that she changed and might have seen my private parts once or twice, it was the first time she has seen grown men's genitals!

She also said to me, "The old guys didn't mind the enemas like the ladies." Some things never change.

I had just come out of recovery from an endoscopy appointment and my mother and aunt were visiting. They unexpectantly made reference to the fact that in their childhood, they were given many enemas (all 10 children). When my mother mentioned this, my aunt (her sister) tried to shush her up from telling this to me because she was embarrassed. Then, an embarrassing thing happened when family members came over to do some spring cleaning in one of my grandmother's bedrooms. When they moved the bed, a big dirty nozzle had been found on the floor underneath the bed which had been occupied by my aunt and her female “friend.” So enemas apparently have played big part in our family. They have often referred to them jokingly as “fizzies.” I think I'm gonna take myself a fizzy.

Not enemas, but many years ago i was drinking in the local pub, a couple at the bar were chatting, and i heard him say we will need vaseline, to which she said we have some ky somewhere, as id fancied her for years it got my interest, but not the time to speak. but im guessing anal sex was on the cards.

another half heard conversation in a local supermarket that had its own chemists/pharmacy , i saw a young girl at the counter talking to the woman in charge, didnt heard all the convo, but seems the girl was seeking something to make her shit, should have lingered longer, maybe closer, if i was single i could have offered my services…..she didnt seem to be getting the help she wanted.

@eman5 We second graders, most age 7, were just bac from our winter break when our somewhat prim asked each of us to stand and say ho we had spnt the time. Wh en her turn came, Vivian said , "I wasi sick and my mother had to give me an enema." There were a few giggles , but the teacher got flustered and said "We don't talk about such things in school." But in the ear;ly 1950s enemas were a fact of life.

Brought back memories - one of my grade school teachers (4th or 5th) was the opposite of your teacher. My teacher loved to talk about enemas, especially when came time for “health class”. The best was one time when she mentioned how the night before she had to give herself and enema and went into allot of details about it and of mentioning that while it was difficult she controlled her breathing such that she could take the entire full bag and then held it of a bit to make sure it really worked! My classmates all listened very intently, but we all felt a little embarrassed hearing all this..

They call us liars, and then when we tell the truth they don't want to hear it!!