Re: doctor/patient eye contact

Thinking about physical exams, and it might help to mention what you are wearing as the patient, where are the eyes of the doctor, and do they change in the course of the exam?

As an example, my current doctor and I are looking directly at each other while he is across the exam room, putting notes into the computer during the history update. He is looking at the areas of my body when he comes back, I am in briefs, and he is conducting the exam. But he has to have pivoted, from me to my briefs, because he noted that I was in 'my skivvies.' I'll have to keep track of where his eyes are at the pre-hernia check moment, does he look up as he inserts his finger? Where is he looking as I get on hands and knees?

There was no question that a doctor for whom I had undressed completely was looking at my genitals when he entered the exam room. It's too late to recall where his eyes were during the exam.

I think eye contact can improve an exam.

While he is taking my medical history and we are talking pre-exam, we are both looking each other in the eye, for the most part. If I point to an area that hurts, obviously he looks where I'm pointing. My doctor does not have me undress for the exam, so I just have a seat up on the table when the time comes. During the exam, he is looking at what he is examining. Could be my ear, neck, belly, or balls. That's just part of examining something, look, touch, feel, inspect, etc. There is very little eye contact between us once the exam starts.

However, after my last hernia exam, my doctor stands up in front of me (with my pants still around mid thighs) looks me in the eyes and we had a long conversation about hernias. His eyes never left mine, I was impressed. Then suddenly, in mid sentence, he tells me it's time for him to check my prostate. That we can finish our conversation afterwards, so I don't have to stand around all day with my pants around my knees. I appreciated that. When he finishes and I stand to pull my pants up, with him standing in front of me, I did notice him glance down at my genitals just for a brief moment. Not sure why, but I definitely noticed.

In a 'professional' exam, the doctor's eye contact would be normal, and not generally focussed on the genitals or any particular area of the body unless examining them, where that would be the natural focus.

However, in a 'play' exam, there are considerable opportunities for the doctor to manipulate the tension in the situation. Close observation while undressing, pointed eye contact at certain points such as when a hand approaches the genitals, or during insertion of the finger to the rectum can all heighten the experience for the patient.

Sometimes and absence of words, instead replaced with eye contact, may also be powerful, such as when a patient involuntarily leaks becomes erect or leaks precum.

Dr. Fox

Right on Dr. Fox. I think for me there is always more anticipation that he is looking at my genitals when in reality its hardly that at all. Stripped and on the table tends to make me highly self conscious and likely to misinterpret nonverbal cues. Great question.