Dissecting bisexuality
Almost everybody in the civilized world at this point realizes that sexual orientation is not a choice.
Most folks have a pretty decent handle of what's gay, and what's lesbian. What gets hopelessly misunderstood are us bisexuals.
Most people think sexuality runs binary- gay.........straight. In fact, like gender, it's a spectrum- gay...infinite variations...straight. Also, our sexuality does not change with our partners. We are not lesbian with women, straight with men, we are bisexual with both. Just a tiny sample of things people have asked/commented-
- So you couldn't get a date with a guy, huh?
- When you're with a woman, which one plays the guy?
- Can't make up your mind, huh?
- Pick a side, and stay there!
Statements like these clearly indicate that commonly, people have no clue what a bisexual is, and what we do. I don't wake up in the morning and say- Today I'm straight, I will hunt for men. It's a matter of who I develop an attraction to. I enjoy casual sex, I'll go out to get laid. I have no idea who, or what sex, I'll be coming home with. I tend to break down my attraction to- For sex, I prefer men. For a relationship, I prefer women. I would much rather wake up with, and make breakfast for, a woman. With men, I just hope they've gone home. That's still bisexuality, but just right of center. If I had NO preferrence whatsoever, it would be dead center, if I only had sex with women occasionally, it would be left of center. Let's re-examine the comments above, based on the fact that our sexuality is not changeable- We are full time bisexual.
- I didn't feel any chemistry with the guys I met, but the cutie at the end of the bar winked at me.
- No one 'plays' the man. In girl/girl sex we are both women...that's kinda the point.
- There's no mind to be made up, I was born bisexual. Making up your mind is for restaurant menus.
- I can't pick a side. Both sides are equally appealing. Apple, or orange?
Bisexuality is not greedy, it's not confusion, it's not a grey area of peole who do not know where they stand. Bisexuality is a just an invisible point in space between gay, and straight.
Now we just have to deal with the other issue- Girl/girl bisexuality, 'That's sooooo sexy', guy/guy bisexuality, 'Yuck, that is soooo gross!".