Parental Spanking into later Years

Hi All,

I was speaking to a young lady a few days back that she was 22 and still spanked by her mum as she has had to move back home since finishing uni. She says she finds it difficult to speak about some times as people automatically says things like "you're lying; it's just your fantasy" or "it's abuse, go to the police."

So the 2 questions I have for you is:

1) Were\are any of you spanked by your parents past say the age of 18?

2) Do you think there are many out there in the situation of this young lady?

If possible, when answering, please state your gender and age, to help us see what the view is from different generations and genders.

Regards

Donna

Any child still spanked by their mother at age 22 deserves what they get. Besides, this is a relatively unimportant dynamic in the grand scheme of things. This kid needs to grow up.

She probably graduated from college and has insufficient funds to live on her own. She needs to set some rules with her parents and they need to accept she is an adult.

Going to the police is about the WORST possible idea. This will definitely destroy the family.

Keep the fucking government OUT of their family domestic matters.

I find this interesting, a 22 YO woman still being spanked by her mother... What an interesting dynamic if it is true. I wonder why she will NOT stand up to her mother and say NO MORE! I don't know what country this woman is in, whether it be the USA or UK, that is not only assault and battery, but also domestic violence. In some cases where it exists, adult protective services is available. Is this real consent and is this something she has not grown out of yet?

Sorry Switchablesusie, I have to disagree on this one....

I am a 22 year old Male college student and these are my thoughts.

I will have to echo what Intrepid said. The strength of the argument that a spanked 22 year old deserves what she gets is very dependent on the stipulation that her mother is not FUCKING CRAZY. To me, the idea that she would be spanked at 22 speaks to a catastrophic failure of parenting on the part of the mother/father. By 22 you are an adult, and one of the core pillars of adulthood, I would argue, would be to accept and deal with the consequences of your decisions and not have the prime negative impact come from parental discipline. By 22 parents should be supporting, not guiding as their primary role. As to why she is not running away from this crazy bitch is probably because she was sheltered to a degree that she has little to no autonomy. I was 21 when I ran away and only survived because I had good friends and a foothold outside of the world my parents controlled. I almost did not make it because my sheltering and abusive parents did not teach me any important life skills, all of which I learned later on the fly. Another key fact is that without EXPRESSED consent (something dubiously procured, if sought at all) by both parties this is by all accounts abuse. The fact that the mother probably does not the common sense to comprehend that by laying hands on her daughter, even with good intentions, she is abusing and assaulting an adult speaks volumes as to the quality of her parenting. My point is that spanking a 22 year old girl speaks more to the character and the (in)competency of the parent, rather than the poor girl.

While I do not think it is necessarily a wise idea to treat an adult as a child----My house My rules... She should move out if she doesn't like it. Or better yet talk to her mother to explain why she feels it is unacceptable.

Funny, I was talking about this with a woman that I met last summer. We were at a NJ shore restaurant bar, waiting for our friends. As we got to know each other better, it turned out that I wasn't the only girl spanked into my twenties. Turned out that she had almost been expelled from her college, had to live at home, and was subject to spankings for any violation of house rules.

With me, it was different. I have always been submissive since childhood and I craved spankings. When I turned 14, mom told me that I would be grounded, now that I was a teen. I asked her if i could take a spanking, instead of grounding, an she reluctantly agreed. As you can imagine, mom was a bit perplexed, but, being a Southern girl from Louisiana (by way of Texas), she was spanked through college, too. My parents put me through college and grad school and bought me a car. All they asked was that I, as the oldest child, set an example for my siblings. I was spanked by my mother until i finished grad school, found a high school teaching job, and moved out, four months shy of my 24th birthday. I am now 30 years old and married to a wonderful guy who gets down to the bare facts, whenever I misbehave! You know what i mean!!!

So california and late 40s.

To answer the questions:

1. No I don't think are many people out there like this and even back when I was a kid I doubt there were many back than. I can only speak for the US so other countries and culture's I can't speak about but I have my doubts that an adult being spanked by their parents would happen.

much.

My wife was spanked in high school a few times and that by most cultures would seem like pretty late in life to be spanked. However she was techically still a child and it it worked but I seriously doubt her mom would have found it appropriate after she graduated high scool.

Male, 72 . Being a child of the 50's and 60's my parents were firm believers in the biblical adage "Spare the rod and spoil the child" only in this case it was the hand or the oval oak hair brush. So my brothers and I were spanked on our naughty bare bottoms till the time we left home for college at age 18 or 19 and then again when we came home on the weekends or holiday breaks. Not only were we spanked by our Mom, butt also by our step-dad after she re-married, and our Aunt and Uncle as well, because looking back now, I can see that they were all Spanko's because of being brought up in their era where their parents did the same to them.

Yes it hurt and we learned from every spanking we deserved and a lot we didn't deserve. We never thought of it as abuse it was just the way it was at least in my neighborhood because ours was "It Takes A Village" where all the parents were given permission to spank should their son or daughter get out of hand.

I agree with Switchablesusie keep the govt. out .

I agree with Switchablesusie keep the govt. out .

Just to be precise on matters like this, it is not government as such that might become involved should anyone go to the police to lodge a complaint. It will be first of all the police, who often act with impunity regarding the laws and a lack of understanding of domestic situations. And they probably work cases like this off by rote, assuming and suspecting the worst of everyone. Not to mention someone with a police scanner picking up a juicy tidbit for the local news ...

The main result would probably be to end up with some kind of social service involved.

A better way to put it would be to keep authorities out.

Just to be precise on matters like this, it is not government as such that might become involved should anyone go to the police to lodge a complaint. It will be first of all the police, who often act with impunity regarding the laws and a lack of understanding of domestic situations. And they probably work cases like this off by rote, assuming and suspecting the worst of everyone. Not to mention someone with a police scanner picking up a juicy tidbit for the local news ...

The main result would probably be to end up with some kind of social service involved.

A better way to put it would be to keep authorities out.

The police IS the government at work.

Make no mistake about that.

The same holds true for getting married. That also brings the government into your life.

[ The same holds true for getting married. That also brings the government into your life.

Getting married means that a subset of laws now apply to you and your spouse. Laws are something that exist on their own, outside of government, being sometimes centuries old if not more.

Equating all the various levels of authorities with 'The Government' is painting with too broad a brush since they often work in opposition or at cross-purposes.

But all of the subtle distinctions notwithstanding, involving others of whatever provenance in domestic situations like the one described, is not a good idea.

Agracier is right, the "authorities" in this case would be municipal or county police enforcing state law. Calling the police is not equivalent to invoking the federal government.

I don't care what you want to call it. If you call the police, that is "the law" and because that can land you in court or worse, that is indeed part of the government.

I suppose there may be what we call in statistics, outliers. A very small percentage, but when you multiply it by the billions that live on this planet, it is well possible that a few kids were spanked into their late teens or early 20s. In my childhood growing up in the 60s when spanking was more prevalent, I rarely heard of anyone getting spanked past 14 or so. Having researched spanking a lot, I have only turned up a handful of credible stories where older teens have been spanked, one being Debbie Boone, who received a bare bottom spanking from her dad at age 15, and Tanya Harding (who probably really needed it) from her mom .

We have two adult daughters living at home 20 ands 18. They both get spanked. If they live under our roof and we support them they deserve spanking if they violate the house rules. This is how they were raised, so really nothing has changed, except their ages.

I am a male who was spanked on a regular basis by my mom until I was 19 years old. The majority of my spankings came after I was 16, as mom decided she had not spanked me enough when I really deserved to be spanked at younger ages. As a result, I was usually spanked at least once a month, between the ages of 16 and 19. I really did not resent those spankings, as I believe I deserved every spanking my mom ever gave me. The spankings were always given over mom's knee with the palm of her hand. My mom always emphasized that she gave spankings, not beatings or lickings as some parents gave. Spankings from mom always consisted of either 10 or 20 swats, dependent upon the severity of the reason for the spanking. I was thankful that I only ever got two 20 swat spankings, as a 20 swatter normally brought me to tears even in my late teens. I trust I have answered the questions you asks in your post.

As a result, I was usually spanked at least once a month, between the ages of 16 and 19.

If you exhibit behavior that warrants a punishment - spanking - at least once a month for several years on end, why didn't you just change your behavior? Usually, you don't need to repeat things 48 times (minimum) to get a message across.

Did you perhaps actually want to get spanked? That would make more sense as an explanation. Especially given the age. Or another take would be that perhaps your mother set the parameters so that no matter what you did, you got a spanking.

I just really cannot get over the idea that spanking into later years must be consensual in one way or another. And if so, well then, it really doesn't serve much of a disciplinary or educational value at all, now will it?

I was spanked by my parents until i was 17. They resumed at age 20 when i had a wild party iin my college dorm and almost got expelled. I lost my dorm priviledges and had to commute from home. I had to agree to the restoration of "House Rules", with paddlings from mom, for any violations. That, or leave college, get a job, and live on my own!

It was a long time ago in rural America----My brothers and I got paddled bare butt thru high school It had to be for something serious---It hurt on our bare butts big time--It happened with my friends the same way--so we thought it was just a normal part of being a good parent and being an obedient son Although football guys always got teased when their bare butts showed a spanking paddling it was a common sight for any of us at one time or another----I am glad things are different today but since it was such a common thing with my friends and I--it was not a big deal except for a damn sore butt!

I think spanking over 18 would have to be with consent or would be abuse. I can't say I was spanked after very early teens and would have left home over it if I got spanked any older. I did anyway as soon as I could and never went back. I like to redden a bottom but it is always with consent. Getting spanked at 22 is her own fault and probably the result of having no money and nowhere to go.

Not over 18 but just shy of 18. My parents found reasons to spank me as long as they legally could. I clearly have issues now because of it. I miss certain aspects of it but am disgusted at the same time.

Dad took over my spankings at thirteen and spanked me until I was eighteen, but never spanked me after my eighteenth birthday.

I was spanked from a very young age 3 or so until I was 14 by my dad. My step father picked up from there when I moved in with him. I'm 30 and live in the US. I grew up in the south and my dad still lives there. I went down to visit him when I was 28 and he gave me a very hard beating with a razor strap for not eating enough. (I have an eating disorder). I didn't argue with him about it. I guess I deserved it. It was a one-time thing.

I went down to visit him when I was 28 and he gave me a very hard beating with a razor strap for not eating enough. (I have an eating disorder). I didn't argue with him about it. I guess I deserved it. It was a one-time thing.

A razor-strap beating for having an eating disorder, for not eating enough? Wow, really enlightened. Instead of perhaps inquiring into which dishes that might entice you into getting an appetite?

I went down to visit him when I was 28 and he gave me a very hard beating with a razor strap for not eating enough. (I have an eating disorder).

Really??

Really??

A razor-strap beating for having an eating disorder, for not eating enough? Wow, really enlightened. Instead of perhaps inquiring into which dishes that might entice you into getting an appetite?

Yes really. I've had this problem since I was a small child and I always got very hard spankings for it. He thought he could beat the "drama" out of me. It only seemed to make it worse. He would take away my meals as a kid so I would be "grateful" for it when I got it back. The state took me off of him when I was 13, so I guess that says a lot.

The state took me off of him when I was 13, so I guess that says a lot.

That does say a lot. So, why did you let him beat you with a razor strop?? I could see you allowing it if that is something you secretly want or enjoy?

Nothing wrong with wanting a spanking. Lots of folks here are into it and are looking for reasons for someone to spank them. IF you were spanked a lot for not eating, maybe you developed a fetish connecting the two (not eating and spanking). Do you have anyone else who spanks you?

I went down to visit him when I was 28 and he gave me a very hard beating with a razor strap for not eating enough. (I have an eating disorder).

Did any of your physicians ever say you were under nourished or under weight?

I would think by age 28 you would have some pretty serious medical conditions if that were the case.

Sounds mighty weird to me. If your parents were so concverned why didn't they ask you what you wanted to eat?

Did any of your physicians ever say you were under nourished or under weight?

I would think by age 28 you would have some pretty serious medical conditions if that were the case.

Sounds mighty weird to me. If your parents were so concverned why didn't they ask you what you wanted to eat?

That does say a lot. So, why did you let him beat you with a razor strop?? I could see you allowing it if that is something you secretly want or enjoy?

Nothing wrong with wanting a spanking. Lots of folks here are into it and are looking for reasons for someone to spank them. IF you were spanked a lot for not eating, maybe you developed a fetish connecting the two (not eating and spanking). Do you have anyone else who spanks you?

I was actually getting ready to go to a treatment program. That's why I came to see him. I wanted him to know I was getting help. I did have/still have serious medical problems. I have an uneven heartbeat, walk with a cane, and suffer from a lot of joint pain.

I was actually staying with him for a week. He thought I was eating and keeping it down. He caught me throwing it up and just lost it.

I couldn't have stopped my dad if I wanted to. He's half a foot taller than me and pretty strong. Yes, I was used to being spanked for not eating. It was the way he showed he cared, in his own messed up way. Plus he promised to pay for my college so I didn't want to piss him off by reporting it.

My husband spanks me all the time. I don't get it for not eating but I do get it for lying about how badly my disorder is affecting me (that program didn't help me at all) He wants me to come to hm for help when I'm having bad days.