Dream Rectal Thermometer

What would your dream rectal thermometer be like?

Mine would be extremely uncomfortable, require daily readings, and be motion-and-sound sensitive...in other words, the more I make any sort of movement or sound, the longer it would have to stay in.

The pediatric clinic had the traditional B-D red flared end type. I think the ideal "adult size" thermometer would be a inch or so longer, about twice the diameter, that is, about 1/4", and have a bulb that was about 3/8" diameter so that the thermometer would stay firmly in place after insertion.

I'm not into RT like many here are. But if I were, my ideal RT thermometer would have some size to it so you would know it was in your rectum. It would also have a tiny transmitter to send readings to a small display device you could put in your pocket, or even sent to your smartphone. Then, anytime you wanted you could check your reading. Because the thermometer device stays in the rectum, it must be removed before you poop or receive any other type of rectal insertions.

I love the old ring top glass veterinary thermometers, thicker and longer than a human one, they were great

I'd like the old fashioned pear shape bulb...popular in the '50's. I have a collection of "stubby" thermometers but the thick, three sided pear bulbs are hard to come by.

I recently saw a vintage candy thermometer in an antique store and thought it looked pretty sexy. A few years ago, one of my friends was a nurse for Halloween and had this foot long, giant plastic thermometer that looked just like an old glass rectal thermometer. I was not successful finding one like it, but I did look.