I have been in my relationship for 5 years and we have a pretty vanilla sex life.
I love him to pieces, but it is very difficult for me to communicate my emotions let alone to tell him what i may or may not like in bed.
He recently found a conversation I had with another man through some app i downloaded. He basically read a kinky conversation i had w/ a stranger.
No, I never had intentions of meeting this person or having sex with him but it was nice to talk to someone who wouldn't judge me and is knowledgeable. I guess it was just something done out of boredom to fulfill my submissive cravings ? I'm not sure, but i promise you I do not want any other Dick then that of my boyfriends inside me.
I've been doing my share of kinky research and I have found I might be naturally submissive.
I don't like to have to think. I don't want to think I just want to let go. Sometimes I feel i just don't know how or what to do next. I want my man in control of the situation at hand always. I like and almost need that guidance.
He is a great man, and i truly want nothing more then to please him. He is naturally an Alpha male so I know being more dominant wouldn't be a big issue.
I guess I am just overly embarrassed at what he saw and do not know how to tell him I may be naturally submissive-and I'd like him to show more Dominance.
Communicating is not my thing.
He currently hasn't been talking to me at all-we live together.
Every now and then when he makes eye contact with me he makes a look of disgust and turns away.
I cleaned the house spic and span and made him T-bone steak dinner last night, and nothing. Is he punishing me? Do I just let it be until he approaches me? Do i go out and buy some kinky toys and tell him what i may like?
I feel as if he in someway wants to be dominant, but is waiting for me to say it? When he called me out on the conversation i had he threw in a comment along the lines of "That's why I don't fuck you like that". Might of missed a word here and there.... It is a really awkward conversation for me to have especially being so embarrassed of the conversation he read b/c it put the wrong ideas in his head. (I don't want to fuck strangers.The conversation implied I would potentially have sex w/ him had i ever met this stranger.) HELP?
😢