I had an appendectomy in 2007 and I was terrified of having surgery. I almost ran away from the ER when I was asked to sign the consent for the procedure.
I have come a long way from being terrified to fantasizing about all kinds of procedures.
My husband told me one day while laughing: " I think you like having surgeries." ?
Hmmmm... I had a plastic surgery years after that appendectomy, but it wasn't fully my idea. My husband was so happy to be declared cancer free that he bought himself his dream car and offered me as "gift" a cosmetic procedure I mentioned years before that I've been wanting all of my life.
The surgery was performed by a famous plastic surgeon ( he's been on a show on tv, that's the most I can say) and probably the fact that everything went amazing gave me the boost of confidence and the courage I needed to get over the fear of surgeries.
When I had a tonsillectomy a couple of years ago, not only I wasn't scared at all when the ENT suggested the procedure, but I found myself weirdly excited and happy he reached that conclusion. At the pre-op as he was explaining what's going to happen and what complications are possible during and after surgery, I could care less about any of it.
I've been experiencing an unexplained "high" and told the doctor that none of that was going to happen to me; and I truly believed it.
Surgery day felt for me as if I was going to the spa. I was relaxed, positive and joking with the staff. After being discharged, the first thing I asked my husband was a bagel with cream cheese.
I ate a bagel with cream cheese a few hours after tonsillectomy. ?I don't know if I was high from the drugs they gave me, or if it was all that confidence and positivity I had before surgery.
For a while I didn't know what to make of my fantasies, feelings and thoughts. I feel relieved that there are other people thinking about these sort of things as well and that I'm not the only one.