For bi-curious ambivalent men: Do you want to cum first or last?

I have raging gay fantasies until I cum and then the gay part of me shuts off and I'm turned off by gay contact. I've yet to have a truly gay encounter after 58 years. I'm concerned that if I did go ahead and seek out a gay encounter that if I came first I wouldn't be able to reciprocate. Is that normal or something others feel? Those men out there who give oral sex, is it as exciting after you cum as it is before?

I'm a bit older than you and my experience has been that my sexual desire stops almost right away after orgasm, regardless of whether my partner is male or female or just from masturbating to a fantasy. You know a common complaint among women is that we men finish too quickly and then just roll over and go to sleep. I can't say I'm "turned off", in the sense of being disgusted or ashamed, after cumming with a women, but I have often had that feeling when I cum first with another man or masturbate to homsexual fantasies. I've learned to work through it with male partners, take a moment to let any bad feelings subside, and then re-focus on making my partner's experience complete and satisfying. We men get horny again pretty quickly. Force yourself to keep working on your partner if you cum first and you'll find that pretty soon you're back into it mentally and physically. Partners should talk beforehand anyway to learn each others expectations. Some of my partners were only interested in making me cum and expected no reciprocation. If you've got the time, take a break after you cum to relax - quiet talk, a shower together maybe - and then enthusiastically do your part to make sure he has a satisfying experience with you. It's possible for both of you to cum multiple times during the course of a day together this way. I speak from experience. Send me a message if you'd like to talk about this some more off-line.

I prefer the guy Im with to cum first - and I want him to feel relaxed and focused on my cuming when he is in receive mode:-)

xx

I will concur that after I cum, I will feel physically and psychologically satiated- I do need a few minutes to just lie back and take in what I have experienced. So it is hard to continue to play with a partner and get them off if they have not had their orgasm before mine. But after a few minutes of collecting myself, I do take great pleasure in getting my partner off and seeing their orgasm. Being right there up close manipulating my partner to orgasm is quite a turn on and gives me real satisfaction. So first or last- either way works for me.

I would prefer to Cum Together at the same time while in a 69er as we use Vibrators in each others Ass which brings us to WILD ORGASM's TOGETHER!! Other that that scenario I would rather he Cum First. (~:

Being a Pices and naturally selfless I preffer to bring satisfaction to my partner before giving myself gratification.

Why not try gay sex without cumming at all? Sexual activity needn't result in orgasm for it to be pleasant and fulfilling. And that way you could still retain your arousal state without feeling let down afterwards.

It wasn't for me. I still love the second and want to keep going. But I've been with a couple of guys who totally lost interest when they can first. It was a real bummer.

I don't have a lot of Bi-Experiences but I've enjoy a few through the years and oral sex was very exciting both giving and receiving !! A 69er was my favorite and him and me both erupted our hot loads in each others mouth as we used vibrators in each others ass !! It was AWESOME and I so want to share that with another Bi-Guy who seeks the same sensuous orgasm !!