What method absorbs caffeine the fastest?

Two 1 quart enemas held for 20 mins each or one 2 quart enema held for 20 mins?

Please discuss as I am in a real pickle here lol.

One of medical professionals will probably prove me wrong, and in scientific terms, but I doubt that the difference amounts to much more than a fart.

Ladydoc -

I think we're into "splitting expulsions".....

Come on guys, seriously now. What do you think? From a logical stand point it would seem that two 1 quart enemas would be best for max caffeine absorbtion as the contents are taken in a lower volume but have a full 20 mins each to be absorbed by your system.

On the other hand you have the full 2 quarts which can be absorbed over a greater surface area seeing as how more volume means more contact with more of your colon...

So what say you enema gods???? If you wanted to absorb the most amount of caffeine from your coffee enema (And you didn't want to drink it) what would you do??

This is actually a good question.

I read somewhere that your colon can absorb a pint to pint and a half of water an hour.

So assuming you will not hold it for more than an hour - the most you can absorb is a pint and a half.

So anything more than a quart put into your ass will just be expelled without effect. Right?

Or is there some way your colon gets the caffeine out of the water without absorbing all of the water?

This brings up another good question... If you use salt in your coffee enema how will this affect the absorption of the caffeine seeing as how the salt prevents water from being absorbed... Hmmmmmmmm

One should be reminded that caffeine is a poison, just like nicotine and many other alkaloids. While consuming normal amounts of coffee in cups over a period of time would dose you with a moderate amount of caffeine, two quarts of strong coffee in one shot could be problematic, especially for people with cardiovascular issues. Be careful!

I'm neither an anatomist nor a medical professional, but here is my two-cents worth of understanding:

The lower end of the colon absorbs liquid from fecal matter for its living. That function is why feces are semi-solid instead of runny. To do this absorption, there are a lot of capillaries near the inner surface of the tube down there. These feed into the hemorrhoidal veins (the ones that can get painfully inflamed) which lead directly to the hepatic portal venous system which goes into the liver. Thus, much of the liquid absorbed from the rectum goes directly to the liver.

Higher in the colon, while some absorption does take place, it's not as effective as the absorption down lower. Consequently, anything delivered by enema that goes higher is less absorbed than that which stays lower. So both logic, and my own experience, suggest that two smaller enemas will waste less coffee than one larger one. In fact, a very slow drop-by-drop infusion (Google "Murphy drip") is probably the most effective of all, as it gives time for the body to absorb liquid before more is added..

Another factor in absorption rate may be one's state of hydration, as logic says more fluid will be absorbed if you are thirsty than if not. A really strong coffee enema can induce a horrific caffeine buzz that I find not at all pleasant. Take a coffee enema and then check your blood pressure. When I did that it was enough to scare me off of coffee enemas!

Hugs,

Diane

Drinking unsweetened iced tea on an empty stomach. In High School, I could get the caffeine to kick in almost as fast as the school drunk felt his morning hit of Mad Dog!!

Everything is a poison if you take enough of it. Hell Water can kill you if you drink too much of it. Moderation is what we should be teaching. Not trying to scare people out of a practice that is undeniably good for your health IF done in moderation.