When I was growing up in the 70's and 80's, we girls especially were taught that it wasn't cool to be a tease. Of course this wasn't from our parents, but what was commonly talked about with peers. Well, I can honestly say, I was never a tease because I never made it that far, lol. Not that I wanted or tried to, lol, I was a good girl honest.
I have been a nurse now for about 9 years, someplace around there. I have pretty much seen it all and done it all by this time in my career. I have had to put a lot of my patients in some very uncomfortable places, both mentally and physically. I have delivered good news, great news, and sometimes bad news to my patients and their families. I also seldom cause my patients pleasure, but often cause them pain, and with this, over the years have tried to make things as easy and pleasant on my patients as possible.
One of my favorite sections in the old Reader's Digest was a section called "Laughter is the Best Medicine". In that section, people would submit funny stories with a medical based theme. Anyway, as a nurse, and over the years, I agree, laughter is the best medicine. And with my job being to either rehab you, which means pushing you to work even when you hurt, or changing your dressings to heal your wounds, which can also be quite painful. Or, if you are there to stay for good, making your end days as pleasant and pain free as possible, either way, either situation, most patients really don't have any reason to, or are not given the opportunity to laugh, and neither are their families. I have over the years, in my own little way, tried to change this.
I have found that people tend to laugh when they are embarrassed, and in America, nothing is more embarrassing to us than our bottoms and everything to do with it. And here is where I have learned to be an enema tease, lol. I have only used this with men though, never with women for some reason or another, well, I'm sure it's a prostate thing, lol.
I can't tell you how many times I have been pushing my med cart down the hall, and it's usually the new patients, always men, and always the ones who are there for surgery/rehab, or who are not very sick etc. yell out, "hey Nurse, got anything on that cart for me?" Oh please boys, don't open yourselves up like that, lol.
Sometimes I get cranky guys, they are hurting, they are sick, I totally get that. Sometimes they get even crankier when they want meds, or more meds I can't give them. They beg, they plead and will say, "come on, isn't there anything you can give me?" Again, prime opportunity here, lol. So, I look at them in the face and I say point blank, "well, I can always give you an enema!" This usually does two things for my male patients, it embarrasses them and makes them smile, and it reminds them who's in charge. Once in a while I will get a patient who, and now that I have been into the med fet world for 4 years now I understand, will have a snappy come back, and sometimes I find that it's me who gets embarrassed. Doesn't happen very often, but has on occasion. And for the record, it's usually these guys that end up being my favorites. I also realize that the guys with the snappy come backs probably are into enemas, and men into enemas are also often into nurses. So instead of me embarrassing them and making them laugh, I sort of am the one getting embarrassed because he has called my bluff. It's also these same guys that during their stay, and almost always at least once during my shift they will remind me that they are ready for their enema anytime I am, lol. My reply to them then is usually something like, "yeah, I'll get right on that." Then we both laugh.
I currently have a patient who has three sons. The three sons come in every night during my shift and feed their mother dinner. A lot of the employees at my facility do not like them because they are very picky about how their mother is being taken care of, but I can't fault them for that. I would do the same if it were my mom in there too. But "the boys" as I call them have caused a number of employees to receive a "talking" to because one of them have complained. They also are all highly educated, and a little reserved, or so I thought, and sort of keep to themselves, and also so I thought. So I decided from the start that I was going to get on their good side. I knew that two of them are History teachers, I love history and thought about being a history teacher for a good bit, and the other is a lawyer, which my father was. So, I knew finding common ground with them would not be all that difficult.
Goodness knows I love a good challenge, so you know as they say, "let the games begin". I started out with making a point every night to say hi as soon as I saw them. After a while, maybe a month of doing this everyday I worked, I decided to take it up a notch. So one night when they walked in I smiled real big and said, "hi boys, how are you?" A few weeks later I kicked it up another notch and one night when they walked in I said, "Larry, Curly, Moe", and we all laughed. Well, that apparently did it for them, it was at that point I think they figured out that they liked me or something because a few nights later the boys walked in and they walked up to me and said, "hi, I'm Larry, this is my brother Daryl, and this is my other brother Daryl". Which is a reference to an old TV show we used to have here in the states, but I used to watch that shoe and understood the reference.
If I had to guess, I would have to say the boys range in age from probably 53 to 63 by the looks of them, the age of their mother, and the fact that none of them are retired yet. Oddly enough all three are single and have been previously married, two of them to nurses might I add. So moving up to current, about a month ago the oldest came out of his mothers room after pushing her back from the dinning room. I was standing at my cart a few door up and he asked me if I had anything on that cart for him. Well again, my stock answer. However, these boys are in a position with my facility, that if I make the wrong comment, they take what I think is funny and are offended, I would probably get in trouble. So, I had to make a split second decision, do I toss out my enema comment, or smile and keep my mouth shut. Lol, yeah, you would think by now I would have learned to keep my mouth shut but no, out it came.
All three boys sort of stopped dead in their tracks, their faces got a little red, then all three of them had smiles from ear to ear. The oldest who is also the most outspoken of the three was the one who had the snappy come back, and he said, "Interesting, I'll keep that in mind for a later date." Then the other two boys just giggled. Now I don't know about you, but I don't often see men of that age often giggle, especially not history teachers or lawyers. I struck something in them that day, and at that point I knew I had made the right choice by being cheeky. It's been since then that I have learned that two of them were married to nurses.
One night I was sitting at my desk charting and they walked in. It was a Wednesday because I have every Tuesday off. Again it was the oldest that came up and said, "I missed you yesterday, I needed your services." I probably got a little red faced and laughed. My come back to him was, "Well, did you get everything cleared up, or do we need to have a further conversation concerning that matter?" "Nope, everything's working just fine now, but I missed you yesterday." he said.
A week after that their mom suddenly stopped breathing while in the dinning room. I was on my hall, but the STNA's rushed her back to her room and it was very obvious that she was not breathing. Well, she is a DNRCC, which means I basically do nothing. The three boys had made that decision years ago, but when the event happens it's never easy, people change their minds. And there I was in her room, the three boys were crying. I had just walked back in from smoking and I live in Ohio, it's winter, my hands were ice cold. I asked the boys if she had eaten anything, or had anything to drink. One of them said yes, so I grabbed the suction machine off the wall, attached the hose and suctioned a rather large bite of food from her mouth. Still not breathing, there isn't much I could do, seeing the boys in tears was killing me. So, without thinking I uncovered her legs and calling her name as I rubbed my very cold hands up and down her legs. I couldn't go anyplace near her chest, but I couldn't just stand there doing nothing with the boys watching me either, so I rubbed her legs. A few seconds later she pinked up and took a breath. With the boys watching I said, "well, I've never been a believer of "the laying on of hands, but with hands as cold as mine are, it's no wonder it brought her back." Then they all laughed.
Needless to say she is now on a puree diet so hopefully that won't happen again, or anytime soon. The following day the boys all came in and they all hugged me and thanked me for saving their mom. I made a cheeky comment to lighten the mood per my usual and said something about I knew my cold hands would come in handy at some point or another, and the baby in the family, who is usually the shyest of the group said, "as long as you warm them up before giving me my enema I'm good with that." And I said, "oh, and here I thought the only kinky one in the family was Larry, see, that's why I'm a nurse, I learn something everyday." We all laughed. Now about everyday one of them says something or another cheeky to me. I kicked it up another notch the other day too. Again the oldest asked me what I had to offer him that day and I said, "well, my standard 2 quarts, or, on special today, I have a nice big shot, and I only give shots in the tush, so your choice, what will it be today?" While the other two boys were giggling the oldest said, "well, I'm not into shots." While I almost responded, "well sometimes my patients don't always have a choice", I thought it best not to push it that far, at least not yet anyway, lol, so I just said, "okay then, it's the triple H for you." Again all three of them laughed and told me they would see me tomorrow.
So again at the end of a way way way too long post, my point is that I have found laughter to be the best medicine, and boys will be boys, no matter what their age. A little butt humor does the trick every time. Try it sometime, you might just be surprised how quickly you find out who is and who isn't a fellow kinkster.
Let me know how it goes for you.
Mashie