Heya,
This isn't the big story I'm working on but here is a scene I whipped up during class today when my students were ignoring me as they frequently do.
Please keep any critique to yourself. This is very personal stuff. If you like it, great, if not, ya can't please em all. :p if i write more ill post in the library section but here is a small taste. Hope you enjoy!
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Logan starts by taking her pulse. As he tucks his watch back into his pocket, he pulls out his penlight and shines it in her eyes. He holds up his pointer finger.
LOGAN. Look here.
RAVEENA. Aren't you going to welcome me back from china?
LOGAN. Filthy, dangerous country. Contaminated food, water, air. ( he palpates her throat and neck.)
RAVEENA. Oh, come on...
LOGAN. I need you not to talk. (he finishes with her throat and neck glands)
RAVEENA. I was really careful about the water. I didn't drink any out of a tap and I closed my mouth whenever I was in the shower.
LOGAN. Mmm hm, and now I need you to open your mouth. Come on. (he inserts the tounge depressor and shines his penlight into her mouth.). Say aah.
RAVEENA. Aahh.
LOGAN. (removes his stethoscope, inserts the earpieces, and lifts up the back of her shirt as he speaks). Probably inhaled more secondhand smoke in the past 10 months than you have in the past ten years. Take a deep breath in. And out. Again. Once more. Good, all clear. Don't you DARE start smoking!
RAVEENA Logan, I...( he removes the earpieces and moves to percuss her chest, stopping her words.After percussing he moves his stethoscope to her heart and listens for a long time, occasionally asking her to take a deep breath. After finishing, he removes the earpieces and gently motions for her to lie down by pressing on her shoulder. He starts to palpate her abdomen.)
LOGAN. Any travelers diarrhea while you were there?
RAVEENA. If I say yes, are you going to freak out?
LOGAN. I just need to know.
RAVEENA. Yes.
LOGAN. Raveena...
RAVEENA. I tried pig brain, ok. Don't worry it's not an experience I wish to repeat.
(LOGAN moves to palpating her liver and spleen. Afterwards he listens to her heart once again. When he's finished, he removes the stethoscope and places it back in its case. He sits next to Raveena on the bed.)
LOGAN. Not a day went by that I didn't worry about you. I'm so glad you're home safe, my love. He leans over and hugs her, burying his head in her shoulder.