Movie "The Secretary"

I checked the search engine here and it came up empty so I'll assume nobody brought this up yet. Have any of you BDSM devotees seen "The Secretary" starring James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhaal? What did you think of it? I really enjoyed it. I thought they treated the subject really well without making the characters look like nutjobs. The bathtub scene was highly erotic without being sleazy and it had an almost fairy tale ending. I liked it but I'm not a real BDSM purist. Maybe you hardcore sadists and masochists thought it was really lame. I'd like to hear your reaction. Oh yeah, one more thing, Maggie is one hot looking woman.

I have seen the movie. The scene in which she attempts to undergo a self-spanking is resonant with those of us who have a spanking fetish ...been there ... done that.

James Spader was also good in "Crash". Lots of eroticism in that flick too.

I love that movie! Maggie is so beautiful....

Excellent movie.saw it on utube.dont remember when it first came out?

A good one 😃 its next to The Pet lol

Impassionedpat,

It's interesting that you liked "The Pet". I was not aware of this film until you mentioned it so I looked it up and read the reviews on Amazon.com. It was not well liked. The consensus was that it was not at all about the dynamics of a Dom/Sub relationship but more about kidnapping and violence to the point of killing, dismembering and organ selling. I'm not judging because I've not seen it but it would be interesting to know what you liked about it.

I really liked Secretary. The first spanking scene was amazing. And the scene where he's telling her exactly what to eat.

Brilliant film! I had a friend who's wife called him a 'perv' for renting it, but ended up watching it and enjoying it! She jumped into bed with him afterwards - she'd found it quite erotic!

Actually I have to go against popular opinion, mostly I didn't care for it at all. Not because I am "hard core" because I'm not, but the film treated BDSM like a disease. In my opinion they did make them look like a pair of nutjobs.

Maggie's character had a history of injuring herself nearly to the point of mutilation. In the end their relationship looked like it was just a controlled and safer extension of her mental illness without dealing with the cause of it. Just because a person is a submissive doesn't mean they are sick, but the film sure made it look that way.

Spader's character was so confused about his own sexual desires he didn't know how to deal with it at all. Also if I remember the film correctly he appears to have habitually molested all his past employees. I like to think most doms have a bit more selfcontrol then that.

But that aside it did have some good points, some of the scenes were pretty hot and I did like the happy ending. Maybe the best and most important part was as you say, is they didn't make it look pervy. Was it a fair depiction? I don't think so, but that is just me and I over analyze.

The movie was good, but not great. I did enjoy it, though. But, at some level, it treated BDSM as some kind of disease/character flaw. But we have to take into account that it is a fairly mainstream movie and as a result, it is kind of limited to where it can go.

But we have to take into account that it is a fairly mainstream movie and as a result, it is kind of limited to where it can go.

That's a good point. So do you think it would be possible for a mainstream film about BDSM or simply sub/dom relationships to be less limited?

Personally I would like to think that it is possible, but I have no idea how anyone could portray it that way in a mainstream film. Would it have to be less intense or more intense?

Maybe if a film, particularly a standard date movie/romantic-comedy had a side plot about a BDSM couple it could avoid the problems "The Secretary" ended up having. While it isn't my favourite movie genre, it seems like romantic comedies often feature a wacky best friend as a standard character. Maybe if that was handled sympathetically it could pave the way for a real BDSM love story.

Or is there such a movie already out there?

I liked that film for the fact that it did bring the aspects of bdsm into more mainstream ( and that James spader is hot lol)

I liked it because it showed that bdsm is not just about sex and the forbidden ,it showed how much love and compassion does into a d/s relationship.

I liked it a lot, though I would say it was a good beginning for a film to deal with the material.

I would like to address whether they were portrayed as nutjobs so to speak.

To me, they were like most people, struggling with some problems they don't know how to solve and trying to hide them from the world.

However, like any old fashioned love story, they found in each others issues, the solution to their own. And I thought it worked very nicely in that regard, and kind of normalized the bdsm to the world for just that reason, just two people who happened to be right together.

Anyway count me another fan

I got "The Secretary" DVD from the local indie video store a while back after I saw a clip on youtube. I love the movie and I'm going to get it again, now that this thread has reminded me of it. I think there is a serious side of the movie and I like the way it presents the the idea that there's someone for everyone, we just have find that someone.

Yes, it is very good film. Not perfect but good with fun moments and moral message.

JUST SO YOU ALL KNOW, THE NAME OF THE 2002 MOVIE WITH RICHARD SPADER AND MAGGIE GYLLENHAAL IS

"SECRETARY" ---- NOT "THE SECRETARY"

Actually I have to go against popular opinion, mostly I didn't care for it at all. Not because I am "hard core" because I'm not, but the film treated BDSM like a disease. In my opinion they did make them look like a pair of nutjobs.

Maggie's character had a history of injuring herself nearly to the point of mutilation. In the end their relationship looked like it was just a controlled and safer extension of her mental illness without dealing with the cause of it. Just because a person is a submissive doesn't mean they are sick, but the film sure made it look that way.

Spader's character was so confused about his own sexual desires he didn't know how to deal with it at all. Also if I remember the film correctly he appears to have habitually molested all his past employees. I like to think most doms have a bit more selfcontrol then that.

But that aside it did have some good points, some of the scenes were pretty hot and I did like the happy ending. Maybe the best and most important part was as you say, is they didn't make it look pervy. Was it a fair depiction? I don't think so, but that is just me and I over analyze.

I thought the film was wonderful. It did not treat BDSM like a disease, YOU seem to THINK it is a disease, and they were not depicted as nutjobs, YOU thought they were nutjobs. The film depicted them, fairly accurately I think, as a new couple testing each other out. I didn't think the film made her look like a sick submissive either. She, like many submissives (including my husband and myself, we switch) are totally devoted to each other. Spade didn't molest all his prior employees, he was testing them out to see if they would be a suitable mate. My husband and I are devoted to each other and will do whatever we can to please each other, just as Maggie did when she sat at the desk, hour after hour, even urinating in her chair as she did not want to get up against his command to sit at the desk without moving her hands or feet.

I agree with Susie and thought it was a good movie and very erotic. Susie..do you think she was Catholic ??

Actually I have to go against popular opinion, mostly I didn't care for it at all. Not because I am "hard core" because I'm not, but the film treated BDSM like a disease. In my opinion they did make them look like a pair of nutjobs.

Maggie's character had a history of injuring herself nearly to the point of mutilation. In the end their relationship looked like it was just a controlled and safer extension of her mental illness without dealing with the cause of it. Just because a person is a submissive doesn't mean they are sick, but the film sure made it look that way.

Spader's character was so confused about his own sexual desires he didn't know how to deal with it at all. Also if I remember the film correctly he appears to have habitually molested all his past employees. I like to think most doms have a bit more selfcontrol then that.

But that aside it did have some good points, some of the scenes were pretty hot and I did like the happy ending. Maybe the best and most important part was as you say, is they didn't make it look pervy. Was it a fair depiction? I don't think so, but that is just me and I over analyze.

You make some good points. But I don't think the movie's purpose ever was to present D/s relationships in a "positive light"; the story cares little about "gently introducing BDSM to the wider public", and I reckon it's better for it.

I choose to view The Secretary as a story evolving on two major themes. (1) How discovering and enjoying what some would term "deviant practices" can liberate you from deep-rooted demons; and (2) How wildly different (sometimes even unrecognizable) the expressions of love and affection between a man and a woman can be.

Best regards.

Interesting conversation about the movie, it was just on the sat this last week and I did find it interesting.

Not into this type of behaviour but the movie was quite compelling, and did feel that the actors were good at how they presented the theme.

I agree that the scene with Maggie spanking her self in her bathroom was great-This even made me hot, good thing I had my diaper on

My new partner has bought me the movie but I am not allowed to watch it till I have learned it... Having read these comments I am going to work harder

I choose to view The Secretary as a story evolving on two major themes....

I tend to agree with Shyster opinion of The Secretary....

I thought the movie "The Secretary" was probably....

The name of the move is "SECRETARY" -- JUST PLAIN "SECRETARY"---- NOT "THE SECRETARY"

.

I agree with Susie and thought it was a good movie and very erotic. Susie..do you think she was Catholic ??

I give you five to one odds she is!

As I have posted before, based on my discussions with many people, Catholic women make great submissives.

I am sorry to say i have not seen it yet!

One of my favorite 'off the self' films is 9 1/2 weeks......... the scene where the prostitute is bruoght in to meet Kim is great, and Kim's reaction is even better.

It was a good movie, she is a great actress

I tend to agree with Shyster opinion of The Secretary. I found it enjoyable but would rather they hadn't made it seem she was so emotionally unstable. BDSM is a fantastic kink that I wish we were more able to bring in to the mainstream. By linking emotional issues with it, it confuses 'nillas in to thinking something stupid like, "see you have to be crazy to want to be spanked". hehe Which, we know isn't the case.

Nine and 1/2 weeks was hot as hell, but it also ends with the impression that she felt used and manipulated. Don't get me wrong, I love the flick. But, as with the Secretary, it gives a sense to the vanilla world that those types of activities are too far out there to allow ourselves to enjoy.

Just one little bottoms opinion. :😃

Loved the movie, several good laughs!

I've only seen clips but can't wait to see the whole movie... and play out the roles with my partner...

I love when she has the guy tied to the stove and she is throwing tomatoes at him. While most haven't had that experience exactly i think we can all relate and agree that you have to go thru many to find the right fit in a partner.

It is a VERY enjoyable movie. She is lovely and he plays his role well. One of the appeals for me it that it a main stream movie. That makes it all the more naughty

As I recall, Maggie's character was institutionalized because she was a cutter. I don't think that being a cutter is the equivalent to being a nutjob. I was a cutter throughout high school, and I did it because it made me feel good. Provided you don't cut too deep (like Maggie's character did) or get an infection, what is so bad about cutting yourself? I would probably still do it if I hadn't discovered that getting tattoos and getting a BDSM fix is more fun (and less scars). I would be willing to bet there's alot of subs out there who are former so-called "self mutilators".