High stress job = sexual submissiveness

Like many other women who have high-stress day jobs, I find myself increasingly sexually submissive in the bedroom. I fly little airplanes for a living, and make literally life-or-death decisions several times an hour, and at the end of the day nothing is more precious than to just submit to an enema pushing its way deep up into me. Often hubby is part of that psychologically relieving experience, often he's not. To me, the issue of SUBMITTING to the enema is as important as the physical sensations. Go figure.

I would love to hear from others about the relationship they have between stress and sexual submission.

Hugs,

~Diane

Hmmmm...Don't know if it worked that way for me. I got into MedFet as a doc because I was in a high stress executive job. Controlling, firm, etc. I do/did also do enemas personally, and had them (and colonics) given to me, so I suppose if that's submissive I guess. However, enemas constitute a huge personal fetish and I like giving them (or watching women get them, a huge part of my fetish) a lot more than taking them or getting them, so I really am not sure about @azdiane as to her thoughts applying to me. I'm normally sexually very dominant, which has influenced my sexuality since I was a t eenager. I'm also very interested in the responses here, because the psychology of "why I am the way I am" has always been of great interest, since my early thinking was very self-judgmental.

I wouldn't go as far to say I've got a high stress career, but it has major implications if a design of mine leads to failure, or my team fail due to an oversight. I work in a male dominated industry, where I have to really stand my ground, but I like to think i'm fair, balanced and understand my male colleagues, and we have mutual respect. I find Zity is the perfect place to relax after a busy day, once my family are catered for, and settled, as they are the most important thing in my life, I like 'me time' and I'm more than happy to be submissive, give up the management side of life, and just let someone else take over, or read a good kink story, and imagine I'm the character who's being submissive, it really works and helps me to relax, I'm very fortunate to have met some great friend here, who guide me to wonderful places, hope my ramblings make sense♥️

Makes perfect sense @GillyJ .

@LordJim2 thank you♥️

Well written and understand the stress and submit to enema such a rush

I don’t think this just applies to women.

My husband confided in me a year or so that he’d like me to treat him like my little/baby girl.

Of course I was shocked. He’d always been a man’s man, and although he liked it when I took the lead in the bedroom, he was never submissive.

I couldn’t imagine why he’d want to wear nappies and frilly dresses.

But he didn’t want to just *wear* nappies and frilly dresses. He wanted me to ‘make’ him wear them.

We talked about it a lot, and he told me that at work he has to be the boss, making all the big decisions, and that sometimes he just wanted to absolve himself of all responsibilities. Being treated as a little or baby girl was, for him, the ultimate way to do that.

We agreed to give it a go, and it’s worked really well for both of us. He tells me he feels totally relaxed when he’s dressed up, and helps him overcome the stresses of the day.

My entire work life involved stress at every level. It took me at least a day of not working, before I could even think about enjoying sex. For those who had the opposite experience, consider yourself lucky.

@azdiane said,

Like many other women who have high-stress day jobs, I find myself increasingly sexually submissive in the bedroom. …. Often hubby is part of that psychologically relieving experience, often he's not. To me, the issue of SUBMITTING to the enema is as important as the physical sensations.

My grandmother was a retired RN and a firm believer in enemas for a variety of different reasons for kids, teenagers, and adults. Stress being one of them. For example: When she spanked us, we were taken to the bathroom and before getting spanked, we got chewed out for our transgression. Then told to remove our pants and underwear and lay down across her lap. Once the spanking was over, she offered to give us an enema to help calm down, that we were free to accept or refuse. I for one, always accepted the offer and from what my siblings told me, they did too. So, did an enema after a spanking help me calm down, sure did. The spanking was our punishment, not the enema afterwards.

As preteens, once grandmother taught us personal hygiene, enemas became our responsibility. Afterwards, my siblings and I started swapping enemas with each other primarily for health reasons. However, they quickly turned into enemas for pleasure or relieving sexual tension.

After I was married, my wife and used enemas for both health and pleasure. And like me and my siblings, we used enemas to help relieve stress. But unlike my siblings and I, we incorporated sexual intercourse with enemas for stress relief. The combination worked well for me and my wife, along with a few other couples our age that were close friends. Something that came up from time to time while visiting or staying with one another on holidays or weekends.

I’m not sure if there is a 1 to 1 correlation on that though. I knew a C-suite guy who was the domly-ist dom that dommed

@azdiane I feel the same way you do. I make difficult decisions and expend a lot of brain energy during my work day. I would love to give up control in the bedroom and not have to lead navigate the activities.

I think this is a natural extension of the human need for balance in our lives, or at least seek some variety. Many days of work and then you crave a vacation. Sitting at a desk job and then need to walk around and stretch our legs. Not eating the same meal every day but wanting something different.

For me, when the pendulum has swung too far in one direction for too long it wants to swing the other way. I think the urge for submissive time is probably really good for people like us. It gives us a range of experiences, and keeps our outlook and perspective broad. Being in one mindset without variety breeds a narrow point of view. There is a benefit to walking a mile in someone else’s shoes. It keeps us limber and flexible, ready to appreciate and adapt to whatever life sends our way.

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I find Zity is the perfect place to relax after a busy day, once my family are catered for, and settled, as they are the most important thing in my life, I like 'me time' and I'm more than happy to be submissive, give up the management side of life, and just let someone else take over, or read a good kink story, and imagine I'm the character who's being submissive, it really works and helps me to relax, I'm very fortunate to have met some great friend here, who guide me to wonderful places, hope my ramblings make sense♥️

@GillyJ Zity IS INDEED a perfect place to relax after a busy day. And everything did make sense -- many Zity members can relate.

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I knew of a woman years back whose high stress, & very well paid job affected her quite differently. She was often away on business during the week or would stay overnight in London returning to her house husband mostly on Fridays or at the weekends in a fairly stressed up state.

They were into medical play & at the weekend she would always diagnose him with a mysterious complaint she called 'analitis'. This required prolonged treatment with enemas butt plugs & strapon fuckings which he was happy to submit to. I remember at the time thinking lucky guy!

I've been a manager for over 30 years and at the end of my career I was managing over 600 people and on a ship you do not have days off until your contract is over...I have to say that submitting is not a word I have in my dictionary...I love taking enemas and have my ass toyed with, but even in those moments, I never relinquish control...but yes, I had many colleagues that cope with the "managing stress" by being "managed" in their sexual life. This it is always been more common for men then women...at least in my experience....in common we all, submissive or not, always found that an enema session after a particular stressing day, was a godsend... and I've never found giving enemas to be stressful...the only negative was that our kink, unfortunately, could not be lived openly and not always thee was an enema mate ready when a warm bag was needed......

I myself wield a lot of power in my daily life. Is it stressful? Probably and I like it this way.

Sex wise I like to be submissive it is natural for me to give this way. I attract dominant partners so it works out. I seldom use it but reserve the right to say no, so well I don't think I am being entirely submissive since I can say no or make things stop. I will not tolerate being forced into something.

I still have some control.

@azdiane I like to relax with an enema the same as you. Usually I have a partner with me when it's time for relaxation.

The make me poop ones I prefer on my own, the flush is usually quite icky and smelly. I don't like sharing that yuck.

I often end up doing so despite my objections. It is all playful.

My job, by many, is not considered "high stress", but stay at home Mom, care giver, and sole bread winner puts alot on one set of shoulders. There are those moments I think that being taken care of would be so nice.

Then...my inner Domme comes out and hates the idea of not being in the driver's seat. Such a dilemma.

My job as a physician can be very stressful at times, less so now that I’m semi-retired. But my significant other (who is a retired MD) and I share the driver’s seat in our life as a couple. Being in charge is too deeply ingrained in both of us for it to be any other way.

High stress must experience an emotional as well as physical release in order to maintain balance in your life.

I have a high stress job and also a widow with 2 young children so I'm always "on". I definitely enjoy being "cared for" in bed. Not necessarily relinquishing all the control but definitely laying down and doing nothing and having a man care for me is my ideal scenario. It feels great to not have to do anything for once and just feel.

I’ve often thought of a connection between high stress executives and the “need” to be sexually submissive. I consider myself a switch and have never really had a high stress job. However, my late wife (before we met) ran a trauma center and started a limo business. She told me that she originally was sexually submissive, but then decided to try the other side. She liked it so much she became a pro-domme.

I have always been submissive, but just got into “high stress” jobs about five years ago. I think my anxiety and perfectionism has likely caused every job to be somewhat high stress for me - even the ones that didn’t need to be. I also have a somewhat dominant personality outside of the bedroom. Submission calms the chaos in my mind. I think it a similar theory or concept to what you’re referring to.

It often is a cliché but I fall for this one...

Creative, high stress, high stakes job; I am often in control of things in ways that terrify me (I know I can do it but still...); woman in a men's field (though it's changing..); I put all my soul and body in my work...

Well the first sign I am starting to go under a good but intense period of work is when I start craving sensory deprivation, and deep medfet fantasies. Sort of like checking for the exit doors, seeing them, flirting with them, before going back to play with fire ;-)

I knew I was submissive as a young teen, before I knew there was a word for it, long before I was employed. So I can’t say that a high stress job led to being submissive.

I am an only child and never had a close relationship with my parents, which is an understatement. I think there may be a link there to my submissiveness. I’ve done a lot of therapy (for other reasons) but didn’t address my submissive demeanor in those sessions. Im not sure it’s something I want to pursue.

I find the connection between being dominant in a work setting and submissive in sexual contexts an interesting , albeit complicated , correlation and agree with @Mummy_Alison that the transition from dominant to submissive can be applicable to both males and females. I have talked with several female dominatrix who said their typical client(s) were businessmen, lawyers, accountants, bank managers 'etc. who would visit during the work day to be tied up, spanked, enemaed, diapered , "forced " to clean toilets etc. Then they would return to work and resume control again. I don't think it's just exec. types ---male or female-- that enjoy the switch. In the paid context I'm using as an example the regular working guy would not be able to afford dominatrix visits very often much less be able to take extended breaks during the work day to enjoy such revelry. The ladies involved obviously favor the more well off clientele who can afford their services and tend to tip well. ????

@Vzia I hope you’re able to get the breaks you deserve when you can. 🙂

@Larsen I hear you about risk assessment. 😂

Sort of like checking for the exit doors, seeing them, flirting with them, before going back to play with fire ;-)

I definitely relate to this, minus the enemas. (I respect that they’re important to a lot here and feel like I’ve read enough to have an understanding of why people are drawn to them. No judgement; just not my thing. 🙂) My job can involve an incredible amount of risk and always a sense of responsibility. I love what I do, and I also need to be able to turn my “work brain” off at the end of the day, especially if I want to be able to keep at it long-term. My submissive tendencies pre-date my job. Kink is still fun for its own sake, and I’ve also learned to incorporate it as part of stress management. For me, I feel being submissive outside of work has actually made me better in my career. Without that release of pressure, it wouldn’t be sustainable.