Nurturing feminisation or sissification

I have seen lots of media and read many accounts of men being feminize or made into sissies. It's usually depicted as against their will (even if they want it) with humiliation and degradation. Very much a power play with the Dom enjoying the humiliation and degradation.

What I rarely see is men having a partner or mistress that does it in a supportive, caring, nurturing way. No humiliation or degradation but support in their progress and helping to make them grow instead of it being used as a power play. Turning man into the perfect girlfriend or into the perfect sissy play thing. All very much supporting and caring they do their best. Unfortunately I don't know if I am describing this well.

Hoping to find people that have experienced this and willing to share their experiences or can point to media or writings along these lines. Fascinated by the idea and want to learn more.

I have come across an occasional post which describes this 'partnership' approach, but, as you say, 'forced feminisation' is more written about (lots could be fiction! ).

Some men wish to become more feminine, gentle, etc but do not wish for a 'dominant' approach.

My lovely girlfriend encourages me to wear her panties during the day, she claims it is so I think about her all day as well, and she is correct

In my (admittedly limited) experience the 'forced' aspect is important.

My husband confessed to me about a year ago that he'd like me to treat him as my little/baby girl. At first of course I was shocked, but as we discussed it I realised this was a need he had due his very stressful job, and it's drawn us closer than ever. There's nothing quite like sharing your innermost secrets.

I do think that the humiliation of being "made" to wear panties or nappies is a big part of it for him, but it's always done in a playful, consensual way.

I do think that the humiliation of being "made" to wear panties or nappies is a big part of it for him, but it's always done in a playful, consensual way.

That has always been one the attraction for wearing diapers and rubber pants, and being told by my wife when I'm to be changed, along with strict orders not to mess in my diapers without her prior permission, which I have for after beingreallyh nice for a time. It's all consensual, playful and arousing. for both of us.

I think I understand the idea of forced being important to some.

Suppose what I am trying to describe is female led feminization without them directly humiliating their partner.

So your partner has decided it is happening. But they are not doing it to humiliate, but because they love the feminine version of you.

You still have no say, you might still feel humiliation from the clothing, make up, and being treated more feminine. However they are doing it for gentler reasons than "I do this cause I want want to mock you". They do it because they love to see it and want to bring out your feminine side.

Does this make sense, I still don't know how I would word it. It basically comes down to the feminisers motivation. I would love to do it because I love seeing feminized men. Not cause I want to humiliate but because I think it's cute and want to help them be the best fem version of themselves

I had a nappy fetish that i shared with my wife when we met before we had the internet it was magazines forum or penthouse letters that i showed her it was a long time before she put me into a nappy i remember it being exposed,embarrassing,humilating but so sexually exciting that i came before the nappy got taped.i worked away quite often and when i came home my wife/mummy had made me a new outfit rompers,onsies then rhumba panties and then party dresses i was never humiliated as i could see the smile on my wife face .we would go out shopping together and she would hold up a nightie and say it would look good on me and easier to change a nappy,embarassing but not humiliating.the warehouse that we got the material from for my outfits i am sure they knew it was for me as my wife would say pick a patch for your outfit pointing to the baby patches and then ask when the terry towelling would be coming in in our local chemist chain when paying for goods she would say she had forgotten talc, nappy rash cream always got me excited, embarrassed not humiliated

I have a CD friend whose wife lets him dress almost every day. She does not dom. or humiliate him in any way. She just let him be Diane as long as he wants. The only time she insist that he should be Diane is when she knows I'm coming over to visit.

I think the scenario you describe, @DanMichMan, is lovely. A wife feeling so comfortable with her husband that she is happy for him to wear whatever makes him feel happy.

I think the urge to feel humiliated is probably something quite separate from that.

My husband isn’t interested in just dressing in women’s clothes. He wants to be ‘made’ to dress in female clothes, and very specific types of female clothes at that.

It seems like two different things.

@Mummy_Alison if hubby wants to be 'made' to dress in specific clothes. it seems that he desires to dress in that manner, but feels shame or guilt about doing it or he may be worried mummy will be offended or think less or him if he voluntarily cross dreses. So if mummy says, "You will put on that 18-hour playtex 38DD bra!" then his axieties will be relieved. Being made to cross dress is like getting permission from you.

@bratwurst I think he was worried about how I’d react to him telling me he wanted to be made to wear little/baby girl clothes.

What I was trying to say was that he doesn’t want to just wear feminine clothes. He never dresses on his own.

The thrill for him is being ‘made’ to wear those clothes.

I agree Mummy. Although my CD friend is more interested in dressing, I tend to lean toward your baby girl with out the age thing. For of us that need to let go of ourselves and be "pushed" by someone else is a great way to escape. No drugs needed.

I think my mother really wanted me be a girl. She encouraged me to be well groomed and pretty. She always pointed out to other women my nice eyelashes, and rather feminine face. I had some health issues as a young boy and she catered to me, and gave me enemas naked. She bathed me naked (both of us) until I was at least 12 - I did enjoy it! I think if the Trans culture or even Gay was open when I was Jr. High School, my life could have been different! That was 70 years age and even in Los Angeles it was difficult. So my feminization had to remain hidden- Too bad!

I think there is a difference in how feminization is approached in fiction and in real life.

In fiction, there seems to be a need for something compelling behind the feminization process. Probably as something of a sop or justification for 'normal' or straight people who are nonetheless turned on, aroused or interested in the notion of feminization. By adding an element that forcibly compels obedience, it 'absolves' the feminized person of being innately feminine, it places the 'onus' on something or someone else. It's also a useful literary device as it can add a wider array of emotions and themes into the story-telling. A story that is straight-forwardly proceeding without any bumps, push-back, doubts, negativity, strong emotions and so on, can be pretty boring.

In fiction it adds a element that can be explored further and it functions as an excuse for giving in to those desires.

In real life, I doubt that anyone can truly be forced into feminization against their will. There may be some role-playing elements involved, some pretend reluctance and such, but if the idea and notion wasn't already present even unconsciously or subliminally, a forced feminization wouldn't last long or be in any way successful. There has to be compliance and willingness for it to truly work out.

Now where the original feminization desire comes from, may always be somewhat of a mystery in real life. Sure, a parent or family member dressing up a youngster en femme or making them wear lingerie or dresses can be a starting point where the feminization desires started or were implanted. And it happens often enough that these tendencies are not imposed and come about in a natural, spontaneous way, by themselves seemingly.

But the desire can just as well be triggered by a random event or pleasant experience. Even through imagining being feminized through reading.

I hid my desire to wear panties and be treated like a sissy from my wife for many years In fear of her reaction. I gradually introduced elements into our sex life over time and she has become more accepting, although I would not say she is nurturing it! A few weeks ago right after I had given her a mind blowing oral orgasm I put on her silky lace thong that had been tossed on the floor. She walked back into the room saw me standing there in her panties and exclaimed, "you look better in that than I do!". It was the most positive thing she had ever said in regards to my inclinations! She then proceeded to bend me over push the thing out of the way and peg me! It was amazing!

This morning my lovely approached me with a pair of ballet tights and told me to wear these today because it is getting cold outside. She told me she would reward me later today when I get home. I must say the tights are very comfortable and look very nice on me!

And yes I find my lovely to be very nurturing in her ways to encourage me wearing tights and other forms of dance wear as she encourages me to learn the art of ballet. The benefits have been amazing. With her encouragement I have a very trim waist yet well developed legs that look wonderful in tights!

I think their is a middle method/option that is nurturing and also 'degrading and humiliating.' i'm totally turned off and shut down when a guy is mean (i'm gay), forceful, bullying. Any of those attitudes or approaches make me feel like the Top/Dom is compensating, and it feels the opposite of control for me (i understand, this is just my perception, not implying my response is some sort of standard, i know there are plenty on both sides of the slash who want those).

For me, a gentle, affectionate, encouraging, "nurturing" approach has a matter of fact feel to it. I.e., the Top/Dom doesn't need to force something that is already there, rather, they are evoking and controlling it. To me, that is a sort of penetrative mind fuck that goes beyond force. For me, it is particularly powerful if a Top/Dom is simply acting from how He perceives me, not trying to 'make' me into anything, while wanting to evoke and control what He believes is already there.

i think something else that is often confused or missed is, for some, feminization is can be a method of emasculating. I.e., it's not so much about the guy becoming fem as it is losing or acquiescing his masculinity.

i think feelings of shame, embarrassment and the subsequent feelings of degradation and humiliation are conditioned emotions. Culture conditions guys, directly and indirectly, from day one on how they 'should' be (i.e., masculine), and departure from that gets a response that conditions one to hide, etc..

i subscribe to the spectrum theory of human sexuality. On a spectrum, there are infinite variations and degrees one might be 'wired.' I've experienced where a guy both sees and wants that about me, and has a lust/need to have that in me. When that happens, i get very aroused and feel simultaneously affirmed, and at the same time experience those conditioned feelings of "degradation and humiliation," that i do not associate with hurt or pain, but are also deeply arousing given His obvious affirming desire and even need.

Thank you for these reflections. What a dear subject!

I can remember in a bodywork training program, seeing the ladies doing each others' toenails with a bottle of luminous emerald polish someone had brought. I got up my gumption and asked her to do mine. It felt so titillating, exciting, and yes, feminine. It gave me weeks of pleasure.

I enjoy the silky feeling of wearing lingerie, only putting on cotton jockeys when, for example, going to a session where I don't want to distract the therapist.

I would dress up in a dress, lately thinking about wedding dresses. Enjoying the feeling of dressing up doesn't make me gay, or diminish my masculinity. It's a pleasure that many women enjoy, but not exclusive to them. Being and feeling feminine doesn't make make me less of a man, but more of whole person.

The one thing I enjoy about being nurtured is it is a relaxing escape from day to day routine. When my lovely takes me by the hand and leads me to a bath tub filled with warm water and suds and she makes me soak for a while, then hands me a glass of wine to make me even more compliant with her requests. She will slowly shave my legs and remove body hair from every place on my body, then dries me off with warm towel. She then has some items laid out for me, usually a soft pair of leggings some ballet slippers and a soft hoodie as if I was ready for ballet class. She then loves to caress my body while I’m dressed as her ballet student , it truly is relaxing and sensual as well

I have become more comfortable feminizing myself with the help of my girlfriend. I keep it compartmented and enjoy the act of giving up my manhood for a while. I have been in the arms of a strong and gentle man who loved my body. I really enjoyed giving him pleasure and feeling safe in his arms. I have discussed this with my GF and she supports my feelings. I loved having him in me like a girl and no thoughts of manhood. I want to have that feeling again and also enjoy my command role as an alpha male man.

I now have a small collection of pink lace that looks good - although my big shoulders make any illusion difficult to maintain. My GF went with me to buy my first panties, and she loves to see me in my lingerie! I love to make love to her and enjoy the totally passive role as a sissy. Life is good!

At 81 my boy parts no longer function well, and have shrunk from female hormones I took to develop small breasts. A tiny penis is easy to add to my feminine feelings. I don't want to be a woman or girl, but I do enjoy being feminine and accepting men to use me like a girl.

What @tallslenderguy said really resonates with me -- it's possible for a dominant to be nurturing and gentle, and for feminization to still feel somewhat humiliating, or at least intensely vulnerable. I think this is probably more true for cis guys than genderqueer/trans folks but I don't want to assume.

I sometimes fantasize about being gently and patiently, but firmly, feminized and dominated, and it being an intensely emotionally vulnerable and even humiliating experience despite my willingness to be guided. Even though I'm not really attracted to men in day to day life, I do sometimes imagine submitting to a man in this way, which would very much intensify the emotional aspects.

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