Something I hadn't considered before until just recently

As much as I would love to go back in time OR to some alternate timeline to experience the mandated / de facto institutional CFNM experience for myself, one thing that I would definitely NOT want is having to put up with some petty tyrant treating me like cattle, barking orders at me, and hurling insults and abuse at me if I mess up somehow. Fuck THAT noise.

I have a lot of trauma stemming from how my dad often treated me as a child and teenager. That trauma often manifests itself as extreme anger. You want me and my teammates to strip in front of a bunch of ladies? Fine. But if you treat me like anything less than a human being, even though I'm naked and under your authority, you're gonna be wearing that whistle as a butt plug.

To ILuvLadyDocs

Respectfully I think that’s the why we all landed here? I hate they way I was treated as a child, the systematic, attempts constantly to obey, subjugate and do as required to make it all right for whoever for no reason. Ridiculous harmful, traumatic exams against children, vulnerable, and innocent to provide bureaucratic civil servants with what? Nothing. I have yet to see one instance of a miraculous diagnosis because of a school examination and the life saving prognosis. Yet here we are why, because it damaged all of us, most of us are here because of damage, miscommunicated signals because our natural response to something that was invaded or interrupted. I know a guy locally a Dr, he is a friend of a g/f of mine, he’s a Dr, he told me one afternoon while I was in the bathroom with him, how he’d spent the afternoon doing medical exams at a school, and said it was his favorite thing and told me he spent the day in “heaven”. I lost my temper quickly with him, and said why? and I did not let him off the hook ? I fronted him out and said, “What’s wrong with you Dude”? This is my problem. This is why I am here, my natural development was interrupted and an attempt to damage me, by people who think they have a licenses to abuse. As a result the damage is totally done and my interpretation of it is not good. We are mostly here because of some damage or miscommunicated feelings.

There are decent physicians who go through life who care and treat patients with a degree of respect humanity and decency. But alas we know the people who are there for the ride, there is no shortage of them, and they should all burn in hell, and I’m not religious.

I get what you are both saying.

@ILuvLadyDocs - take away the women and it sounds a lot like boot camp at Parris Island! Okay, not much medical, but a lot of verbal abuse and mental games.

@SubPatient4u - for me, it wasn't the doctors and nurses that sent me here. No, it was a combination of the overbearing of our local hypocritical church community, sexual assault at the hands of an evil & abusive cousin, and an alcoholic abusive single parent. Shoot, i rarely saw the doctor as a kid, except for shots and the occasional broken bone. I pulled myself from that hell by going to the "hell" of boot camp, but the insults and threats from the DIs were nothing compared to my old man when he was on a bender.

But you're right, that childhood trauma, that damage makes us who we are, and for many of us, that brings us here to find... what? Reinforcement? Validation? Punishment? Release/escape? Humiliation? Subjugation? Objectification?

For me, yes, all of the above.

I guess that the pursuit of those things has expanded my kink to my recent forays into the CFNM community and as a sub and sub's sub - and punishment, the pain, the humiliation, the role reversal....

Ingesting thread, which has helped me register on my journey and why I'm here.

Looking forward to reading other's thoughts.

If seeing and touching my naked body brings an extra measure of joy to some woman's life, great. Just don't forget that I'm a person.

This is why I differentiate play and real experiences. Dehumanization is only fun when it’s consensual

This is why I differentiate play and real experiences. Dehumanization is only fun when it’s consensual

If I were young again, I still think that being paraded in my birthday suit in front of a bunch of giggling girls and approving women would be an absolute hoot- as long as the mood is kept light. I wouldn't even mind if some of the ladies openly perved on me. However- if whoever's in charge acts like an insufferable douche canoe, forget it. I'll get my kicks elsewhere.

If I were young again, I still think that being paraded in my birthday suit in front of a bunch of giggling girls and approving women would be an absolute hoot- as long as the mood is kept light. I wouldn't even mind if some of the ladies openly perved on me. However- if whoever's in charge acts like an insufferable douche canoe, forget it. I'll get my kicks elsewhere.

We're agreeing. "...if whoever's in charge acts like an insufferable douche canoe, forget it" ie as long as it's consensual - the other party is behaving in a way you deem acceptable.

If I were a kid and was paraded naked in front of an audience of approving adults who were complimentary or light-hearted about it, I'd enjoy/have enjoyed it too.

We're agreeing. "...if whoever's in charge acts like an insufferable douche canoe, forget it" ie as long as it's consensual - the other party is behaving in a way you deem acceptable.

If I were a kid and was paraded naked in front of an audience of approving adults who were complimentary or light-hearted about it, I'd enjoy/have enjoyed it too.

I gotta wonder if the spectators and the folks in charge knew or suspected that at least some of the lads on the receiving end of this scenario were getting a genuine thrill / kick out of that whole situation, and were MORE than happy to obey that tradition.