Ethics of asking partner to be my enema giver

Looking for others' feedback on a situation I'm in.

Recently had surgery. As a result not only am I more constipated than usual, I'm also less mobile and I really do need to make sure things don't get too blocked up. With all of that it would be very helpful to have my beautiful partner be my enema giver.

At the same time I'm also recovered enough to where it would be very probably erotic, unless I wait for it to be really backed up (already took once on my own, very carefully, and while it did work well enough I had to compromise and yes, a giver would be best). So far my partner has been very slow on indulging my anal erotic fantasies, and while I would love for it to move along I also want to respect her.

So... how legit would it be to ask? Anything I should be thinking of? Yeah, gotta say the pipe dream is that (music swells) she realizes she loves it and we ride off into the buttplay sunset for whatever remains of our married life but I'm not counting on that.

If she is your long term partner, why would she not help you with a legit medical need? You would do the same for her, right? It sounds like you are not married since you used the term "partner", but she must care for you to be together. I am married so we have the "in sickness and in health..." but regardless, my wife had to have shoulder replacement surgery, and she joked that "you might have to wipe my butt for a while". I was fine with that. She learned to use her other had so I did not have to actually do it, but I would if she needed my help. She did get constipated from the pain meds so I had to give her a couple of enemas while she recovered. I did not try to make them erotic as I knew she was hurting from her full colon. After one of the enemas she did say "you know what, my rectum is empty after the water enema, so I think I now need a sperm enema. Do you know where I could get one"? I am a good Dr., so I never refuse a patients request, she had her sperm enema. It was not 2 quarts, but it almost felt like I came that much. It had been a dry spell because of the surgery!

I don't see any ethical issues with this. You need a little assistance, nothing wrong with asking her to help. I would think that if she is uncomfortable with this she would just say no. If she does agree to help we will expect a complete report back here.

You would do the same for her, right? It sounds like you are not married since you used the term "partner", but she must care for you to be together.

Oh no, we are married and have been for a while. I've just started to prefer "partner" because I don't want to be seen as thinking it's somehow "better than". And yes, I have done personal care for her after surgeries as well.

It would have been a no-questions yes except for the fact that I do like her playing with my butt and wish she did that and enemas.

I would say that you have little to lose by asking for her assistance with your enemas. She may surprise you by doing it. But, if she resists, I would not push it. You have a better chance because of your surgery and legitimate need for enemas because of the medication than if you asked for an enema out of the blue. Its not a matter of ethics, just whether she is turned off by enemas or not.

When I was a teenager, my girlfriend found out about me and my sister swapping enemas for her period cramps and my constipation issues. We were doing homework at my house one afternoon and I noticed she wasn’t feeling well. So, I asked her what the issue was, that’s when she told me, she had started her period at school and was having cramps. Then asked my sister, if she wouldn’t mind give her a couple of enemas. During the enemas that afternoon, the two girls talked, that’s when my girlfriend found out about me and my sister swapping enemas and the reason. I knew my sister gave my girlfriend a couple of enemas that afternoon. But I hadn’t realized, she told my girlfriend we’d been swapping enemas for over a year. How it all got started and the reason we continued to give each other enemas. A month or two later, I was surprised when my girlfriend approached me about swapping enemas with her. Which, I was more than happy to do. Starting something that lasted until we finished High School.

@Rick6981 I love the fact that you and your sister traded enemas. My sister and I did as well, although not for period cramps on her part, just because we both loved the nasty kink of doing it together. She did her own enemas for cramps usually with mom or grandma if really needed. I only had one girlfriend who my sister told about our enemas, and she admitted to me that she had to give her younger sister enemas, however I never got the chance to broach the subject of trading enemas ourselves because I had to leave for the military.

@stiknclikit said,

I love the fact that you and your sister traded enemas. My sister and I did as well, although not for period cramps on her part, just because we both loved the nasty kink of doing it together.

My sister and I first started giving each other enemas a few months after our RN grandmother taught us personal hygiene at age twelve. In the beginning, it was for constipation issues we both had, because we didn’t like using the bathroom at school. We waited until we got home from school to use the bathroom. Hence, our issues with constipation. We were supposed to take care of ourselves, but we both found it more convenient to give each other enemas. Once my sister started her period, she had issues with cramps and constipation. However, as we got older, our enema swapping became more for pleasure than health reasons.

@Rick6981 I’ve posted here for years about my sister and I trading enemas, using the toilet or shower together and masturbating together often side by side. When younger we and the two neighbor girls had lots of places to hide and at first “play doctor”, but which later turned into watching each other pee or poop. We all knew about enemas and the girls showed us their mom’s equipment in their bathroom. Once, the younger girl gave her older sister an enema in their bedroom as my sister and I watched through their window. Although we still talk about those days, my sister grew out of her enema fascination, but I wonder if those girls ever did as well.

@stiknclikit said,

I’ve posted here for years about my sister and I trading enemas, using the toilet or shower together and masturbating together often side by side.

My siblings and I grew up in a family that was open, when it came to nudity. Due in part to our grandmother, who was a retired Registered Nurse, and didn’t put up with any nonsense about nudity. She would tell anybody who was uptight about being seen naked, “You don’t have anything that hasn’t been seen before. So, get over it.” She taught us growing up, not to be ashamed of our bodies or natural bodily functions, they’re normal. That made growing up open about nudity easy, but at the same time, we learned to respect someone’s privacy or personal space. If we didn’t, we learned the hard way. I should know, because I learned my lesson about privacy the hard way. I was ten years old and accidentally walked in the bathroom without knocking. Violating my two teenage aunt's privacy. Earning me a long hard spanking from both girls, followed by a rinse enema after each one. I made a mistake and paid for it with a sore butt. That being said, kids play around with each other, because they’re curious about their bodies when no one’s around. I know, because we explored one another from head to toe, and didn’t miss a thing in between. And I’m not just talking about my siblings, but other we played with on a regular basis.

Grandma taught her two younger daughters personal hygiene and how to care for and give children enemas as preteens. Then gave them the responsibility for our evening bath, giving us enemas, and occasional spankings. She did this to give her two younger daughters practical experience taking care of kids. Her downstairs bathroom was big with a large walk-in dual head shower. Making it convenient for the girls to put us in the shower together. Then get in with us, to keep order, while they bathe us. So, on evenings when the girls gave us enemas, like us, they were both naked. This started when I was six years old, so consequently, I didn’t think twice about being naked around someone else, whether they were naked or not. The same was also true for my siblings, including our young teenage aunts, who were more like older siblings than aunts.

With at least one, sometimes two, douche/enema bags hanging in the shower. We had a lot of fun playing in the shower together, and during evening bath time, our young teenage aunts joined us. And those two, could get really mischievous and naughty at times. Something we liked, as much as they did, because being naughty sure felt good. 😈 The only problem was, if we got caught being naughty, we got a sore bottom followed by a rinse enema afterwards to help calm down. From grandma and the backside of her hairbrush. 😢 It worked really well on the five of us…

I am a very simple person and find this question mystifying. For the most part, this is a direct, practical question. What would ethics have to do with the request unless is in involved in some other ethically dubious situation such as infidelity or an illegal act - dealing with a minor, etc.?

I am stumped by the inclusion of terms like "ethics" and "legit". But I'll try to provide a suggestion that can be acted upon, depending on what you consider ethical and/or legit:

Ask your partner to assist you with the enemas. Explain the why of it as in the original post. If they decline, drop it and do it yourself. If they agree, accept the procedure(s) in whatever manner in which they feel comfortable.

I DO understand the hesitation to ask, but not asking the questions that are difficult to ask seems a bit unethical to me. It's all part of effective communication.

Wokeism at its finest. 🤷🏼‍♂️

@Rick6981 - What can I say but Wow!! What an amazing childhood you had!! I didn't have any girl cousins or young aunts to participate with us - all lived far enough away that we only saw them once a year or so, plus I have no idea if they received or played enemas. There was one girl cousin I always thought was a knockout, and she did play a large part in my nighttime masturbations, but as it turned out in later teenage years she developed a snooty/snotty? attitude, so I crossed her off my mental list. HaHa! The nudity I mention was just my sister and I whenever left alone, it was just something we discovered we liked and enjoyed the "dirty thrill" of seeing/showing each other that way whether it progressed to fooling around or not. Our parents were not at all nude around the house, but if we saw them accidentally it was no big deal. I think my grandmother liked giving us enemas at any opportunity - and so mom learned from her and continued on. I've posted about the last enema from grandma - I was mid teens, staying at their house and taking a shower before going out. She came up behind me in their shower to scrub my back and ended up giving me one while standing. I kept my back to her to hide my erection but I'm sure she knew.