LADIES: What did your mother tell about first exam?

What did your mother tell you about expected examination during your first gynecologist visit? Was it comprehensive or concise information? Predictions confirmed or were you surprised?

My first gynec appointment was at 21 and I was totally on my own. No information or expectation setting by mom. She just scheduled the appointment with the gynec in our area.

That's it.

I was under too much stress due to personal situation, hence missed period. I didn't even bother to think what will happen. What will doctor say or do. I was blank.

Mom didn't give me any information because she was busy but I don't think it would have helped anyway.

My first gynec appointment was at 21 and I was totally on my own. No information or expectation setting by mom. She just scheduled the appointment with the gynec in our area.

How shocked were you during and after the exam?

Zip, zero, nadda. I'd say my mom was a good mom, but women's health there were some gaps. My grandma was of the opinion if you're not pregnant why do you need a gyn, mom absorbed that attitude or was uncomfortable discussing it or both. It was a particularly unpleasant surprise, as gyn was not good at handling patients with a history of SA, managed to undo at least 5 years of healing in one go. My primary had attempted one but it didn't go well because I was horridly tensed up and she didn't want to push it and cause pain.

Nothing at all. My first exam was in the 6th grade because I had bled for 30 days straight. She made me an appointment with her gyn and he was awful. Zero bedside manner, especially for treating a kid. And she didn’t tell me anything to expect. To be fair, I’m not sure she knew I’d have a full exam at that age.

My mom told me nothing. I was on my own. I learned about my first gyno exam by reading books at the high school library.

Nothing! It was just a matter of fact, time for you to have a yearly check. Be there by 2:45 for a 3:00 appointment. He’s just checking the under carriage.

@RaeW @medfedcouple @hearmyheart @Patient_Shruti Same here. My mom did not prepare me for it in any way. I first went by myself when I was in college. I think my preparation was from listening to other girls, high school and in college.

I am surprised at how many women… had such little understanding, discussions, knowledge from their Moms.

I had my first gyn exam at the age of 14 - because my mom wanted me to go and also made the appointment for me; saying it was completely normal to get checked as soon as you get your first period.

She had always been very open and straightforward when it comes to teaching me stuff about the female body; also sharing her own experiences as well as encouraging me to do my own research, because she wanted me to be better prepared for growing up within that body than she was as a young girl - as her own mother (my grandma who even grew up in a doctor family) had not explained anything to her about sexual maturity.

She did not even leave out the rather terrifying details about some insensitive doctors she had been to back then… which might have made me a bit scared and nervous of my own very first visit at the gyn's. On that day, she would accompany me to the doctor's office, but made me enter the exam room on my own. It wasn't nearly as awkward and lengthy as I had expected, and the doctor was in fact very gentle and sensitive, so I was fine (:

My mom (she is a nurse) told me a lot of things. Actually I was quite young at my first appointment. My mom took me when 13 the first time to the gyn. Not because of a checkup but because of my horrible problems with pain during my periods. I got not an examination on the chair, only an ultrasound on my belly. The first real appointment was when 15. But my Gyn Doctor (female) was not new to me at that time. I was there to get the pill which was necessary due to the fact that I had my first serious boyfriend…and you know 🤭

My mother told me nothing. She never said anything about any feminine issues or concerns. It just wasn't something that was done.

Mom -“It’s a doctor for female issues.”

Amanda - ”what kind of issues?”

M - ”Shes a doctor for periods, breasts, vaginas and in your case it’s for birth control”

A - And why do I have to go?

M- because I know what you and your boyfriend are up to and I don’t want to be a grandma. I made the appointment for you. Most of it is talking. But she will probably also have to take a look down there and check things out.

A - no, Like WTF.

M - Yea, You will go. It’s part of being a woman and growing up. Everyone goes.

———

Just recently she told me she made the appointment for the exam because she had caught me reading about it on the internet. And figured that I needed to go but didn’t know how to ask. I was actually reading about it on the internet because this whole doctor fetish thing. Ugh.

Nada, zero, zelch. My sister made the appointment for me actually she stood beside me and I made the actual appointment and she went with me. I was 17 and it was to get on the pill. My sister told me everything except that I would get a rectal.

Nothing at all.

I think she was at least semi as surprised I was the first time our dr decided to give me a pelvic exam.

She told me zip, zilch, zero.

My sister told me everything except that I would get a rectal.

@Tabitha32 it wouldn’t have been very polite of her to spoil the surprise.

She told me enough to understand that the focus naturally was on reproductive organs, that the dr checks vagina and pelvic anatomy but there was room for much more detail. I'd have preferred to known more about what to expect. This predates the internet when looking things up wasn't so easy.

She had never told me anything.

My mom told me nothing. I was in college and everything I learned came from my sorority sisters. As a result that gyno visit wasn't any big deal although the first speculum experience still was a bit more than I was expecting. Like most things, the first time is a big deal, but each time afterwards wasn't.

She had never told me anything.

@annecobain the same for me. My mother was not good about saying anything sex related - act or medical. It has been a learning curve for me since I started anything sexual.