Is anyone here in the Androgynous lifestyle?

I was wondering if anyone in the zity community was currently living the Androgynous lifestyle.

I'm asking because have been meeting a few during social events and I'm attracted to one that, on the surface seems to share an interest.

Thanks in advance.

Faith

@Faith,

How would you define the Androgynous lifestyle ?

I know several people who are definitely androgynous in appearance, but I never knew it was a "lifestyle"...

This "group", about a dozen strong, meet at various places all looking identical. I feel like I'm in a Robert Palmer music video at times. But it's not only the appearance but the attitude.

I jokingly refer to it as the "oh, I really don't care but continue speaking to me" attitude.

I can see how it might trigger some people but to me it's become more of a word play game at times. How can I hook you into maintaining a conversation.

The groups "leader" doesn't appreciate me hanging out near them or showing up where they are gathering, even tho I'm invited.

I believe it is all more of a pretense group.

Was just wondering if anyone about might have been or is currently involved with some group like this. Just call me curious.

F

How would you define the Androgynous lifestyle ?

Reading the title of the thread, I would have thought it had something to do with transgenders. Mainly those who do not transition completely and for instance keep their birth genitals, while modifying their secondary sex characteristics and especially sporting opposite gender wardrobes and hairstyles.

This "group", about a dozen strong, meet at various places all looking identical.

Then again this puts a different take on it from what I can make of the statement. Perhaps it is more about assuming a group identity and leaving your individuality behind? Which for me then begs the question: how do they look? Are they feminine looking males, or masculine looking women or do they switch about how they look? Are they all the same sex or a mixed group? If mixed, I could see the fun resulting from everyone in the group having to assume a similar look and wardrobe/hairstyle. All femme looking one day and then rugged male on a different occasion.

Interesting post, I am curious to hear more details.

All dress in white slacks, white blazers, white flat shoes. Hair is platinum blonde and all seem to be totally indifferent to all and everything around them. All their names are unisex...Chris, Bobby, or Bobbie, Pat, Sandy, there is a Tyler in there as well..I find it all amusing.

A lack of color in their wardrobe. Eyes are the only thing different.

@ Faith - Why would you continue being around them if they really don't want you there? They sound like a bunch of boors. All I can speak for is myself, but I prefer the company of real people. (Real kinky people, when possible! 😉 )

All dress in white slacks, white blazers, white flat shoes. Hair is platinum blonde and all seem to be totally indifferent to all and everything around them. All their names are unisex...Chris, Bobby, or Bobbie, Pat, Sandy, there is a Tyler in there as well..I find it all amusing.

A lack of color in their wardrobe. Eyes are the only thing different.

Interesting to hear about. From a description like this, I might guess they want to become more AI or android-like in appearance and mannerisms. Group behavior eliminating individuality. Or pretending to be clones. I can get an inkling how that might be fun up to a point.

It also intrigues me if there is any sexual component. Trying to be identical to one another might seem to make the idea of group sex more congenial. After all, if everyone looks alike, it's more like masturbating in a mirror or to a 3D rendering of oneself.

Or conversely, if you looked like someone you sexually desired, there might be feelings of a more intense connection. I have to say that I don't particularly care for how I look and might enjoy doing my best to look like someone else I like/desire. And then if taken to cross-gendering lengths, there is that extra thrill added of pretending to be the opposite gender.

And I suppose you mean that both genders belong to the group?

They don't call themselves 'the Boys from Brazil' by any chance, do they? ... ha ha

Is it a lifestyle or a put-on for the meetings? Do they always dress/act like that, or are they different in their mainstream lives?

If the former, it MAY be a "lifestyle"; if the latter, it's just a hobby...

It's only boring if you allow it to be. And yes I believe they dress the same way at their places of employment, or so I am led to believe.

I irritate the leader Bobby. I call him Robert just to be a shit.

Chris and I have hit it off which also annoys Robert. I believe that this whole extra attention has made Chris curious as to why I would be interested in her.

(She's amazing HOT)

Anyway she has started reaching out to me more and more.

I started this thread just to see if this was a thing or just something isolated to Chicago.

FYI. https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/lifestyle-buzz/what-does-it-really-mean-to-be-androgynous/ar-BBV6LB7

The individuals along with the entire concept sound very uninteresting. I don't feel I'm missing a thing by not being part of it.

FYI. https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/lifestyle-buzz/what-does-it-really-mean-to-be-androgynous/ar-BBV6LB7

I disagree with Sophie Saint Thomas. Androgyny is not a combination of the sexes, but the minimalization of them so there are no apparent sexual characteristics.

It's only boring if you allow it to be. And yes I believe they dress the same way at their places of employment, or so I am led to believe.

I irritate the leader Bobby. I call him Robert just to be a shit.

Chris and I have hit it off which also annoys Robert. I believe that this whole extra attention has made Chris curious as to why I would be interested in her.

(She's amazing HOT)

Anyway she has started reaching out to me more and more.

I started this thread just to see if this was a thing or just something isolated to Chicago.

Ha, awesome. i think it's hilarious that you call the leader "Robert" instead of "Bobby." To me, that sort of emphasizes the unrealness of what they are doing. It seems to me that if one really does identify as androgynous, your asserting otherwise would just cause them to roll their eyes at your 'ignorance' vs being annoyed because you are not affirming them.

When i think of androgynous, i am more inclined to think something along the lines of Victor/Victoria, a fluidity of both? i had a crush on one of the doctors who worked at the hospital where i worked, i found him cute and was attracted for reasons i couldn't necessarily pinpoint. One day i returned to work and he was a she. She is transgender and identifies as a woman, but prior to her (coming out?), she presented as male.

i had to laugh at myself and the situation. i'm a gay guy, and bottom who becomes sub with certain kinds of guys. i'm not attracted to women who are obviously or overtly women... but on more than one occasion, i have discovered the guy i was attracted too was a FtM transgender. Another is attraction to Guys who identify as "Total Top" but present as "she male." i guess a sub category of guys who present as women, but still identify as Tops, but guys who want to look like women? i'm not sure the psychological make up, i've never had the opportunity to be in relationship with such a person, but did date a FtM transgender person, that was a wonderful experience.

All that to say that androgyny to me is more of a mysterious presentation where i'm surprised to learn the person wasn't the sex i thought they were.

All dress in white slacks, white blazers, white flat shoes. Hair is platinum blonde and all seem to be totally indifferent to all and everything around them. All their names are unisex...Chris, Bobby, or Bobbie, Pat, Sandy, there is a Tyler in there as well..I find it all amusing.

A lack of color in their wardrobe. Eyes are the only thing different.

That's a lifestyle? It just sounds like boring wardrobe.

My husband wears basically the same thing (dark three piece suit and tie) every day. It's more his business "uniform" than a lifestyle. Is a police or army uniform/daily clothes a lifestyle? It just sounds more like a cult wardrobe. It sounds pretty shallow to define a lifestyle by the clothes one wears.

All that to say that androgyny to me is more of a mysterious presentation where i'm surprised to learn the person wasn't the sex i thought they were.

I often wonder how many people I look at and see on the streets, in stores or wherever, are really the gender they present themselves as. Especially some women who might just as well turn out to be full or partial transgenders. Some look just as attractive and indistinguishable at first sight from true women.

I can see this when walking through the local red light district. Because mistaken gender used to be the cause of many complaints to the police by irate clients (which was often thought a good joke by many), it is now apparently a requirement that transgender sex workers identify themselves as such by putting a sign in their storefront. So no more mistakes I suppose. Anyway, many times I would not be able say which gender were it not for the signs.

Most transgender people don't like being called "transgenders". It is better to say cisgender or cis women rather than "true women". I support real women and cis women.

@Faith I think the identity is called non-binary.

Within this non-binary spectrum there's a lot of different sides, but in general they don't feel either feminine or masculine.

Some will indeed go as far as using hormones or surgery to remove typical male or female features.

Personally, I don't know to much about non-binary people, I'm a trans woman myself.

If I recall, David Bowie once promoted or was into back in the 1970's when I frequented the rock scene. https://www.pbs.org/newshour/arts/david-bowie-made-androgyny-cool-and-it-was-about-time

Most transgender people don't like being called "transgenders". It is better to say cisgender or cis women rather than "true women". I support real women and cis women.

Obviously, since the actual possibility of truly changing the outward physical attributes of a person's sexual/gender appearance is so new and unprecedented, language has not yet caught up with what science can now accomplish.

Therefore, since language usage can be used to appreciate or denigrate, there is not even a beginning of unanimity on which words to use. 'Appropriate/accepted' terms come and go as fleeting as the wind. This decade, this term is in vogue and the next decade it is another.

Nor is there any kind of central authority that can speak for all concerned or make decisions. It is linguistic anarchy in a matter of speaking, with those figuratively shouting the loudest and getting the most attention, who seem to get their way.

Yes, @Ms Erin, according to a friend they consider themselves as non-binary. She is a genetic female buts identifies as both male and female. She has a "partner" who is genetic male but also considers himself as both. Her 3 other room-mates are non-binary as well. They prefer to be called "both", so, in terms of electronics, binary is one's and zero's, thus non-binary is analog. So, I told "both" I have a new term for them---analog!