Spanking with a nurturing tone

That is my favorite type of fantasy. The calm and loving authority figure who knows that a spanking is in order and is going to deliver. But they assure you of their love and that you are forgiven. The spanking is hard and hurts and your bottom is bright red but you feel better when it’s over. And you are then loved up and reassured.

I didn’t get much of that as a child (my parents were just grab and hit types). But my wife administers loving spankings to me, as well as other discipline if needed.

In my fantasy world I'm in phase with the OP. Of course, those fantasy spankings were self administered, naked, with my own bare hand across the crack of both buttocks. Each slap forcing my penis into the lap of the pretend authority figure, & providing fairly significant sphincter stimulation.

Then through FerLife I found a very honorable, straight, elderly play doctor, who caters to women, but sometimes also to male "littles" & "middles" like me. From him I got some real naked spankings. Problem is that he didn't believe in going across both sides of the buttocks. It was one alternate side at a time. Rather than providing the warm, stinging sphincter stimulation, the pain was very localized and stung, even when it was bare handed. It wasn't erotic The play doc wanted to experiment with various spanking implements, including ping pong handled, & none of them as warm & intimate as a bare hand.

Truth is the localized stinging pain wasn't my cup of tea. The nice play doc told me other clients enjoyed getting the shit spanked out of their bottoms. Not me. We had 5 sessions I was living a dream, but & the whole experience wasn't quite like fantasy. I never even got an erection las I do in my fantasies. However, I did enjoy the attention

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It was my only live CMNM or CFMM meetup in years of posting on the web.. Others fell through because of health problems & hidden agendas. (Well there was also the Asian massage therapist that I paid for & who was so damn nice. )

Then after a short lecture on the seriousness of the offence, my friend was told to bend over with his hands on the chair and got spanked quite harshly with a belt. He had pink traces over his butt for a couple of days and for that reason he had to invent excuses for not showering in order other boys didn’t start asking questions.

That's not exactly spanking with a nurturing tone, that's out and out child sexual abuse. It should have been properly addressed in a prison shower or exercise yard where he'd get a taste of his own medicine

Yes. Being spanked from a place of anger is scary. Being spanked in a calm manner for your own good is preferable, if you have to be spanked at all.

Sometimes I'd protest I didn't need a spanking and she'd say, "But I think you do, Tommy. Mommy has to spank you to help you be a good boy." (...) When I'd protest it would hurt, she'd say, "I know it will. A spanking has to hurt to work. Mommy has to make your bottom hurt. That's what a spanking is. You know that."

I heard similar words from my mother. Especially when I complained about pain. My mother explained to me that corporal punishment must be painful to be effective. When I complained during the spanking that I was in pain, my mother replied: I know it hurts, but you must feel the pain in your bottom. Thanks to this, the punishment works as it should.

Being spanked by mom she was an angry spanker, there was never any doubt that my bare bottom was fixing to get blistered . As for my aunt she was more apologetic, never raised her voice but in a calm tone would say “I’m sorry but you will need to be punished so as she was retrieving the wooden paddle she calmly said please remove your pants and underwear and bend over its going to hurt” being used to an angry tone this was very exciting.

I never recall being spanked by either an out-of-control parent or one who was not calm and did not approach the task as something necessary and to be done properly. While I was always afraid to go over my dad's lap for a spanking, it was because I knew the spanking would hurt and be given with that desired purpose in mind. I was never afraid of my Dad, however, and knew that even though he was going to thoroughly punish my backside, he was never going to significantly hurt me or was spanking me for reasons other than making me atone for my misbehavior. I truly am thankful that I was spanked as a boy and primarily by a Dad who cared about and loved me. My Dad was my hero and he still is.

The only person I felt spanked with no nurturing tone was the P.E. teacher in high school who paddled our backsides with a vengeance and no emotional response at all.

Only time that I was spanked was when I had accdents in my pants and then laced back into diapers. My mother and sitter did not like it. They spanked me several times and each time I would need to have diapers on afterwards.

Never when I was young. Now, they can be both scolding and nurturing depending on the mistress' mood.

My mom spanked me as I remember only a few times... I remember they were out of love for me never anger. She always did it bare butt and it was a slap. I remember it stung and burned my butt cheeks. Naturally I fussed and cried. My mom always told me she hated to have to hit me but she had to. She said Eric you need to know what you did was wrong. Mostly I did something to my younger brother which led her to spank me. As I was crying she always hugged me tight and told me she loved me and she explained why she spanked me. Then she said now you will not do what you did again. I said no as I still had tears in my eyes. This I believe is how spankings should be done.... Out of pure love....

Mom does most of my spanking and she never spank in anger.

When she is angry she will ask me to go to my room to prepare for my spanking. It can be half an hour to an hour wait before she comes to my room. During this time she will calm down her anger and I nervously waiting and thinking of my coming punishment.

When she comes to my room she will lecture me and tell me why I was to be spanked. When the lecture is over my panties is pull down and I have to ask her to spank me and tell her what this spanking is for. This is to let let me know and remind me why l was spanked. All spanking end up with a sore bottom (0|0). That I will not be able to sit properly for days.

After the spanking is over mom will call me over and tell me that she is doing this to keep me on the good and narrow path. She will remind me that she still loves me though I misbehaved. After that she will hug me and tell me all is forgiven this is the time I treasure most as I feel love. She care enough to spank me so that I don’t go on the wrong path.

Sometimes I wonder if a nurturing tone in spanking is a facade for other things. Clearly the lack of rage and anger is a good thing, and assures that the person spanking possesses greater stability and control. But what if the one doing the spanking enjoys giving a spanking? Usually, there is a presence, countenance, attitude that we bring to the table. Of course, in the absolute sense, compassion, love and reason are the framers of reasonable corporal punishments. But, what about those who enjoy giving a spanking? Do they wear a mask of duty, a somber face when having to answer the call to duty that requires a sound spanking. They say that they don't want to do this; they may say its sadly inevitable, but now, they must; and so, with no rage, as they slap away, their questions, and comments, may mask excitement, or zeal?

Think about it. What can leave the greatest "mark" on a memory? Could it be those spankings that had a bite, but the sting turned out to be "sweet"? What if that amazing bottom, is what possibly provoked the call of duty, now painted, perfectly flushed and colored with no bruises or marks; a true, angry, red. That takes great care in delivery. And then on the spankee's part, what of the awakenings. The excitements, the fascinations, or the fact that they may have had a spanking fetish spanked into their bare posteriors one slap at a time, while someone, gently commented on how they brought all of this on themselves and it's such a shame, and comforted and sympathized with compassionate and condescending tongue clicks; And yet, the hand slaps on and on......

This kind of spanking is my dream spanking. something really sweet and calming.

“oh sweetie, i know you are embarrassed and upset, but mommy needs to do this. it helps you learn a lesson and you need a little humility. Now take down your overalls and your cute little panties and over mamas lap, it’s okay if you cry but please try to stay still, last time you went over mommy’s lap you squirmed, and you wet all over my leg. now, are you ready babygirl?”

This kind of spanking is my dream spanking. something really sweet and calming.

“oh sweetie, i know you are embarrassed and upset, but mommy needs to do this. it helps you learn a lesson and you need a little humility. Now take down your overalls and your cute little panties and over mamas lap, it’s okay if you cry but please try to stay still, last time you went over mommy’s lap you squirmed, and you wet all over my leg. now, are you ready babygirl?”

Very nurturing. Nice descriptions!

That's how i like to give them. "for your own good." which really should be even more embarrassing for the spankee. i'm not doing it because I'm mad, but because i care for her and I know a hard spanking on her bare bottom is going to help her be her best.

This is my preferred tone I have used as long I have been a spanker. Back in my babysitting days, I consoled the boys and girls who needed a spanking with a tone that leaned toward calm, but stern. "Now lift up your arms so I can pull your pants and underwear down" is verbatim what I said to them. Giving them directions while maintaining a sincere and commanding presence is the key to get them to behave for their spanking.

When I spank an adult woman, I exude a sultry - up close and personal - tone that signifies how much erotic fun we'll be having and that your cute bare butt is all mine!

My wife does all the spanking in our home, me included. She's bigger, stronger & much more dominant than me, & has no trouble stripping me, then stripping herself. She tells me what a naughty little boy I am as she sucks on me & strokes me, to get me hard, before turning me over her knee, she says, it gives her a better handle to hold me as she squeezes me in place, (like a vice grip holding me). Once in place, she burns me up, I start pleading, promising & kicking as she continues to tan my poor, naked exposed hiney, to her punishing hand or paddle. All the time she's asking me how it feels? Am I getting through to you ? It's on to call me mommy when over my knee. Imagine, a man of your age, still having to get spanked like a naughty little boy, mommy style. Are you sorry? Well are you? I bet you're plenty sorry now, aren't you? Aren't you? When she's done, I'm usually crying. She flips me over, telling me to calm down, as she puts a nipple in my mouth, telling me to nurse, as she srtokes my manhood until I loose control.

I like stern but caring. I want to be embarrassed but not feel ashamed or humiliated. I want it to hurt but then made to feel better afterwards.

Thinking about this and will be back with my comments. lol Denise