Non- consent , surprise sports genital exam

I was a teen and without telling me first, my mom took me to the pediatricians office for a sports physical. It was a nurse practitioner and i just assumed the usual sports HEENT and then done . My mom and this NP and I spoke about my health history inside an exam room for about 15 min. (Which was already embarrasing, at that age) the NP then asked me to follow her to another exam room and i started walking and noticed that my mom was whispering something to her. Then we get to another room and she said she dosent have any adult gowns so she is just gonna move around my loose clothing.

After the HEENT , she asked me to lay down on the table and put my arms over my head. I had no idea what was coming. She pulled my shirt and bra up in the air and covering my face. Then started giving me a breast exam, i couldn't see anything cause my shirt was up. And my arms were above my head, so i felt super vulnerable. It lasted a long time and she even slightly pinched my nipples. All i could feel was her hands rubbing my breasts. Once she was done, she left my bra and shirt on my chest still exposing my breasts and then palpated my belly. All of a sudden , she asked me to lift my hips and again, unaware of what was happening, she took both my shorts and underwear off while laying there. She then asked me to get in the frog let position and she started opening up my labia with her fingers and then she spread my cheeks and did an exam of my anus by pressing the outside. She then left the table with me completely exposed and said said to come meet her in the hall.

In shock, i pulled everything back into place and we walked back to the other room where my mom was. The NP said to her " i checked all of her and she is very healthy and has normal development". My mom replied " thanks for doing all that". I was extremely embarrassed and very upset that I'd just been controlled like that.

As a 15 year old, you get what your parent or guardian brings you in for because as a minor, your parent or guardian grants consent.

I suppose you could have violently resisted and they would have called your mother into the room to talk or reason with you or to explain things to your satisfaction.

The NP did not have a good bedside manner or patient management skills, but had you spoken up, you could have been treated better.

The NP should NEVER have covered your face. There was no reason for that. You're NOT an alligator being wrestled out of someone's swimming pool. You should have been treated better.

The problem wasn't what the exam included but what terrible manor the nurse had.

When I was that age and when my children were I expected to be spoken to and treated the same as an adult.

Simply telling you what she was doing and the need for it would have been the way to go.

Do you think that your mom asked the NP to do a more extensive exam?

Do you think that your mom asked the NP to do a more extensive exam?

Absolutely, I know she did.

Examlove, did the NP check internally? How developed were you at the time, tanner stage wise?

It's doubtful that permission would be needed given that a parent was attending the visit. Still, it would have been more thoughtful to inform the teen of what was to happen and why. It was also rather insensitive to just leave her there exposed and tell her to come back to the hall. All things considered, this is one that makes teens upset!

Examlove, did the NP check internally? How developed were you at the time, tanner stage wise?

She didnt no, she just put her fingers deep inside my labia and spread open my vagina and anus with two fingers. She did this by using her fore arms to slightly push back my thighs and pressing down. It was like i couldnt close my legs on the exam if i wanted to. While her fingers examined me outside from clit hood to anus.

I was fully developed. Id say though only B cup breasts.

Examlover1: You say you know for sure that your mother asked the nurse practitioner to do a more extensive exam than a normal sports physical. Do you know what exactly she requested and why?

My yearly exams my step mother did during school vacation and I wasn’t told until about an hour before the appointment so there was no getting out of it and it was always first thing in the morning. She sat in on exams because my step sister had been going to the same female pediatrician for years and the pediatrician was used to her being in the room. Even when we moved and changed doctors she still came in. I think the most embarrassing was when I was 14 she insisted I was having sex and needed to be tested for STDs every year and the doctor agreed. I said I wasn’t but the doctor said it was a good thing to get used to being tested regularly and after the exam I had to go downstairs and meet the std nurse and then get tested. I tried talking to her about not doing it and she said the doctor and your guardian want it done so in my office you go. I still had to do sports physicals at school because my father and step mother felt they were free and it was good in case the pediatrician missed something.

GregB: What did the STD test consist in? Also any idea why your stepmom believed you were having sex?

Back then the std test required swabbing urethras. It was awful. I think because I had a steady girlfriend in 8th grade she assumed we were having sex or she just wanted me tested. I really don’t know.

Sounds like your nurse wasn't very good at working with teens, my Dr always said I'm going to examine... now.

But they don't need to actually ask consent for an exam.

The fact you laid down raised hips didn't say no gives implied consent.

It's like if I'm at home on the bed on my back legs wide apart and dripping wet I don't want the person I'm with to pause and ask for my formal consent it's implied they can just crack on.

I really enjoy hearing the real-life stories of guys and their real physical exams. Just the thought of a guy waiting in the waiting room of his doc's office, only moments away from being totally exposed to the doctor - well let's just say raises my heart rate. When I'm in my doc's office or one of those doc-in-the-box places, I like to take a look around and imagine any of the guys there mentally preparing for their thorough exams in just a few minutes. I wonder if they gave any specific thought to what they were going to wear and what areas of their body they specifically "showered-up" at the thought of the doc's close inspection. I've even thought about what kind of guys might be sitting in the doc's office waiting for their physicals as I pass by a doc's office and see work trucks sitting out in the parking lot.

@GregB: The STD testing, despite your claim to not have been sexually active, is understandable. I can't tell you how many young woman swear they've never been sexually active and couldn't possibly be pregnant, then test positive for pregnancy. I once dealt with a 30 yo nun with lower abdominal pain. Lower abd pn in a woman of child-bearing age is assumed to be an ectopic pregnancy until proven otherwise. She had to have a pregnancy test done. (It came out negative, but the point was, there were no exceptions).

"greg B"

you said that your parents choose to send you to school sports physicals because they were free and useful in case the private doctor had forgotten to check something

how were performed your school sports physicals?

in group or alone ? in a gym or a single room?

with female doctor and female nurse or a male doctor?

in the nude or in briefs?

more thorough or less that the examination of your private doctor ?

and as regards the STD testing asked by your step mother for which you had to go upstairs with a nurse, how was it performed ?

I agree with the majority of remarks, the nurse practitioner was very insensitive. Be a male or female receiving an exam, there is no excuse to treat a teen like that or anyone for that matter! Sorry that was your experience. I hope it hasn't made you avoid having exams?

@Badgy1

Back then the std test required swabbing urethras. It was awful.

Was it painful? How deep did the swab go and did you have it every year?

@ekgbob20 The swabs initially were small and went in about an inch but they were more rigid which was painful. Then they switched to large q tip like they have now that I can remember a nurse practitioner putting in about 3 inches in was the furthest and it was uncomfortable but not super painful. Usually they would swirl it around to in order to get a good sample.