Is Giving a Blow Job more Intimate than Being Fucked

@ddell2 its easy to be blunt when you’re a) old and b) behind a keyboard 🤣🤣🤣

@Nurse_Phillips you probably have more insurance too.

Come to think of it, my mother, I think, considered oral sex to be something for perverts. And I recall a girlfriend hesitating and I think it was because it was associated with pornography and degradation… She also mentioned the fear of receiving semen in the mouth, perhaps unannounced.

I suppose it would depend on the blow job and it depends on the sex… Like, I fucking LOVE giving a guy a BJ (like, more than I enjoy it done on myself - maybe I haven’t met anyone who knows how to orally please a lady, tragedy of my life). As someone who is maybe of a younger generation than the other ladies here who have weighed in recently… I don’t just suck a guy’s dick because it’s there and he wants it or even because it’s “just what’s done”. It’s something that I want to do (and honestly, tease that I am, I might actually deny it if it’s explicitly requested by the man). It’s more intimate in that it’s something that I’m doing specifically because I REALLY like this person, I desperately want to please him, and I’m (honestly! Truly!) not actually expecting anything in return. The BJ IS my pleasure and reward (well, my partner cumming is the reward…).

Intercourse is certainly an intimate activity (in most cases), but I think I like the act of sex to be much more reciprocal… So is that MORE intimate because both me and my partner are hoping to get off together? Maybe. But on the other hand, if it’s just done to kind of “blow off steam” at the end of the day or if my partner wants it and I’m just kind of like, “Eh, sure, whatever, go ahead” then… maybe it is less intimate than the oral sex.

I have very much liked reading the ladies' candid comments here. Personally although I find a blowjob visually exciting I prefer the feel of an expert hand job especially delivered with lubed shiny latex gloves (maybe I have never encountered the right woman?) However @Asteria I am puzzled as to why you need insurance, I don't think anyone's ever had a blowjob that powerful!

I was born in the middle of the boomer generation where nice girls were supposed to wait until marriage and the rest of us either engaged in oral sex as one way to avoid getting pregnant while others chose another route to avoid pregnancy. Then there were those of us who chose both routes. But the other route is not the subject of this topic thread.

@Asteria that was my upbringing and how I reacted to my first sexual, penis in vagina, experience. I gave away the one thing, time, I had to give to that one special person (it was my sub, still going after 38 plus years).

Blow jobs could be done without any issue of getting pregnant. An intimate time between two people who may not have had any protection against pregnancy.

It depends on the approach and positioning. BJs with the goal of cumming only aren't as good as BJs with the goal of making the partner writhe in pleasure, just like a lot of hard fucking doesn't feel as good as when you and your partner are on the same wavelength and taking it slower. It's a matter of mindset from the get-go.

I find it hard to imagine a woman saying this outside of a male fantasy. Getting fucked is intimate… giving a blowjob can be fun but it’s… well, you have to understand that sensual elements aside it’s just having something in your mouth. And men tend on average to be more fascinated with that thing than women.

I don’t doubt for gay men it’s maybe a more significant experience just like I’m sure eating pussy isn’t as significant for straight men as it is for me. (Though the pusspuss, I will say, has so many more points of interest than the cock.)

But also, men make the experience degrading in a way that it doesn’t have to be, and which CAN be hot, but not intimate. I do not want to be forced to deethroat by someone’s hand on the back of my head. Fortunately most men have one of two reactions to being told “stop that or I’ll bite down” and it’s either they lose their erection in which case I no longer feel any pressure to keep blowing someone who doesn’t respect me, or they continue doing it without my consent, at which point I get to bite a dick so win win.

(This is a joke. I will get the fuck out of dodge, however, if such a clear boundary is violated.)

When tons and tons of guys think this is the aim when receiving a blowjob, it’s hard to think of it as an intimate act.

I don’t doubt for gay men it’s maybe a more significant experience just like I’m sure eating pussy isn’t as significant for straight men as it is for me. (Though the pusspuss, I will say, has so many more points of interest than the cock.)

Idk, I find eating out super sensual from a giving perspective. I love giving oral, and make sure I mix up my stimuli and intentionally stop or slow down to build the tension. I feel really connected to my partner during that time, with my goal to ultimately make her cum, but to also make her feel really fucking good along the way.

@Asteria that was my upbringing and how I reacted to my first sexual, penis in vagina, experience. I gave away the one thing, time, I had to give to that one special person (it was my sub, still going after 38 plus years).

Blow jobs could be done without any issue of getting pregnant. An intimate time between two people who may not have had any protection against pregnancy.

@MissStress that was the way it was with my husband and we were too afraid to have penis in vagina sex because of the worry about getting pregnant. But I really fell for the guy and we did a lot of heavy petting and I hated to leave him in that condition and a 'hand job' was messy and at the time I was not very good at it. I knew about 'blow jobs' because of the other older girls and also about anal intercourse which would be something we would do later in our courtship.

That first time that I fellated him was scary for both of us because I really did not know what I was doing and he ejaculated quickly and the look on his face from the beginning to the end is something I will never forget. He was surprised that I would actually take him into my mouth but it felt good and since we were in love it was the right thing to do then as it is now. It was very intimate then and still is and something we can do on the spur of the moment and almost anywhere. I have 'gone down' on him in the parking lot of restaurants before going in to have our meal and it is fun having a secret that no one else knows about.

@alan20cm the 'insurance' remark was my attempt at humor from a movie I love watching with Kathy Bates in it called 'Fried Green Tomatoes' there are links to it but I will not put them here and interrupt this thread.

@Asteria Sorry, that one was lost on me. I seem to recall the trailer from the movie had something to do with a cafe beside a railway line? Maybe I should watch it? Anyway thanks again for your frank & stimulating recollections about oral sex.!

I will not say that a blowjob is more intimate than sex, but it sure can be fun and make life interesting.

I for one love to surprise hub, drop them drawers sweetie, then give him a good hummer. Keeps a smile his face and lets him wonder when it will happen again. But turn about is fair play, so he spends his time on his knees using that talented tongue.

Little story. The day our daughter got married, my husband was sweating bullets and as nervous as I had ever seen him. There we are dressed for the wedding, I am in a dress, hose and heels, I told him I was going to relieve his tension, drop your pants, I got down on my knees and gave him a BJ. Well he snapped a picture of me doing so in a mirror.

A week later we were looking at the wedding pictures and there I was on my knees. Glad we caught that one.

I can say for me, as a guy and potential recipient of a "blow job", I feel that intercourse is much more intimate experience. Even though a blow job may feel good, it doesn't have that full-body hugging & kissing to compliment the pleasures of intercourse.

Additionally, I find that hearing & seeing my partners' pleasure is a huge, erotic aphrodisiac! I want my partner to experience at least the same level of pleasure as myself, if not more so!

On the occasion of my first blow job I was cuddling in a vehicle with an older lady who I adored. She unzipped my trousers and took me in her mouth. After a very short time I warned her "it will go in your mouth" and then she responded "that is what I want"! Our relationship then extended to PIV and occasionally anal over more than three decades.