Enema euphemisms

I read that Princess Diana believed in frequent enemas.........kind of puts a new spin on the Royal Flush!

My mother in law who was a nurse referred to them as physics.

I use the Crude Term - "Pump and Dump" .

"Clear out the system" could be useful.

Tummy wash….

“Do you need me to do an intervention?” I don’t know why I said it that way. No clue. At first, my husband didn’t know what I meant. “Do you need me to give an enema?” It was one of those rare times when he was really sick. He said no and argued, but I decided to give it anyway. He’d been a pain, and after an hour in and out of the bathroom and feeling worlds better, he apologized. I went from an angry “B___” to the loving partner who I usually am.

There were times when my mom would conclude that I probably had not had a BM in a day or two and ask if I wanted her to give me a “just little enema” to help me go. If I acted like I didn't like the idea, her coaxing would be “I won't make you much.” Still even at that age somewhere between a pint and a quart of warm soapy water would produce the desired results.

In grad school, I shared an off campus apartment with a friend and fellow student. It had a single bathroom and he became more or less aware of my struggles with constipation. One time, it had gotten particularly bad and I picked up a Fleet bag enema at a pharmacy in hopes of getting some relief. He was in class when I got home and I decided to do the enema while I had some privacy in the apartment. Unfortunately, he came home unexpectedly just as I had unpacked the box containing the bag enema and placed the contents on the bathroom vanity. He made a beeline for the bathroom, and told me through the closed but not locked door that he had to pee in the worst way. Since I had not yet prepared the enema, I replied that it was OK if he needed to use the bathroom. He took that as an invitation to enter immediately. I had planned to try to hide the enema implements, but he opened the door and walked right in before I could put them away. He took note of the bag enema and asked if I was going to use it. I was extremely embarrased but admitted that my constipation issues had gotten really bad and that I had decided to take an enema in an effort to deal with them.

While peeing, he told me that his mother had given him enemas as a kid when he had trouble pooping. He said that she always referred to them as “a little water.” He laughed and said that they were never just a little water and that her enemas made him feel like he was going to explode. He said that he hated them and the way they made him feel. He left the bathroom and went about his business in the apartment while I did the enema. He asked me if I felt better when I came out but, otherwise, never mentioned the enema again.

“I'm going to give you the bag”.

None, ever. My RN mom and I and my ex-GFs and ex-wives #1 + 2 have never had any reason to not say Enema. It’s a great, correct and also erotic word. 🍑💦❗️

Eric

I lived with my uncle for many years from an early age and he would use the phrase “wash-up”.

I first heard it when he had visitors over and sometimes he'd say “do you want a wash-up?" or “I am going to have a wash-up do you want one too?”

I didn't know exactly what it meant until I was 7 or 8 when he explained and we'd both have a “wash-up” usually together, on a weekly basis.

There were no euphemisms when I grew up. I knew exactly what was going to happen! “It's time for your ENEMA.” There was nothing cute or cryptic. “Danny, Mommy needs to give you an ENEMA!” The word was both frightening and exciting. If there were any euphemisms they were for my bottom, i.E. hiney, bummer, bum bum. “Mommy is going to give you a bare bummer enema!”

For a good part of our kids’ formative years, if I told my husband I needed to give him an enema while they were in the room, I’d tell him “it’s time to clean your pipes out”. He’d give me a whimsical look like “yeah right”, then I’d shoot back a look 👀 and raise my brow like I’m serious. This is when his face would get a little red like “oh no, she really is going to clean my ass out tonight.” He’d promptly called his mother or I’d call my parents to see if they would keep the kids, which usually wasn’t a problem.

When we’re doing enemas together, we want the comfort and trust of being naked and relaxed without fear of the kids barging in and seeing Mommy put a tube up Daddy’s butthole. I would hate to try explaining that to my little boy and girl.

I mean it's a medical procedure like any other. “Daddy just needs some help pooping. Maybe this will teach you to knock next time.”

An unusual one mom used to use when we were really young,

“sounds like someone needs a trip over mommy's lap”

As kids, when mom or grandma informed us, we’d be getting a couple of enemas. They always referred to them as enemas. However, when our teenage aunts informed us, we’d be getting a couple of enemas before our bath. They would tell us, “Mom told us to washout your bottoms before your bath this evening.”

There was another euphemism the two girls used when they knew we'd gotten in trouble. It was “warm your bottom up” and meant we're going to get a spanking. Like enemas, grandma gave the responsibility of spankings to our teenage aunts at bath time. She was aware the girls only spanked us with their hand but compensated by spanking us longer and harder than usual. I understood why she deferred both spankings and enemas to our teenage aunts. They were more conveniently done during our evening bath. That being said, my siblings and I hated it, because of the length of their spankings. They were both long and hard. By the time they finished, our bottoms were stinging like they were on fire. Another reason grandma deferring spankings to her teenage daughters during bath time was an enema always followed a spanking. This was done to take our mind off our sore bottom and to help us calm down. This was an area where mom and grandma did things differently. When mom or dad spanked us, there was no enema afterwards. That was a grandma thing.

Around maybe 5, I got sick (puking / upset stomach) during a long car vacation ride back home. Mom looked at me laying in the back seat and said that she would give me the “spritz” when we got home. I had no idea of what this was until I got called into the bathroom to see my Mom sitting on the closed toilet seat, and a red bulb with black nozzle floating in a bowl of soapy water. She made take off my underwear as it was late Summer and get over her lap. Got bulb after bulb. It was dramatic, until I started to like them. Then around 8-9 came the bag. Red combo hot water bottle. Red hose, and the black rectal pipe hanging from the towel bar over the toilet.

Which paraphrases or formulations would defuse the word "enema" or play it down? I can't think of anything that could have made my childhood easier.

"Come with me; I'll make you feel better soon"

...this would have meant that the time from now to better condition would have been the same with the dreaded amount of suds in the ass, the cramps in the colon and burning in the asshole.

What use are nice words? Nothing

There were a few times, but when my mother told me that she was going to do it, she said that she was going to wash it

I came to understand that "You will need a prep" meant an enema is about to be done! Similarly, let's get your temp followed by "turn over" or "this is done rectally."

I don't know how it started or even who the originator was, but "romancing the red bag" was a euphemism that I have not only found amusing but have adopted. My husband grins every time I say it, however, being a recent regular user of an enamel can "red bag" is not quite accurate.

@Emom

I don't know how it started or even who the originator was, but "romancing the red bag" was a euphemism that I have not only found amusing but have adopted. My husband grins every time I say it, however, being a recent regular user of an enamel can "red bag" is not quite accurate.

Could it now be "carrying the can" ...or ...as Suzi Quatro once sung ... Can the Can

Or

Manfred Manns classic snippet .... "Another runner in the night"

@emom: "romancing the red bag"

Makes me think of 1st wife who found it unbelievable that I found my red enema bag sexually exciting.

Of all the words and phrases, “enema” still has the most profound impact with me. Somebody says the word, or I see the word in print, my brain stops what it’s doing and pays attention.

Our older daughter who moved back with us for several months during Covid lockdown said to me, “Mom, I need to do a cleanse.” I have said to my husband that I think he needs an “intervention.” I remember when we were newlyweds, we used to use the word “treatment,” if I bad headache, but it never had the emotional impact of “I’m feeling miserable and need an enema.”

I love Emom’s “romancing the bag” because that’s a good description of how I feel if lying in bed with an intimate partner hanging over me.

@Vicki_V Of all the words and phrases, “enema” still has the most profound impact with me. Somebody says the word, or I see the word in print, my brain stops what it’s doing and pays attention.

Same exact way for me and I wonder why the word "enema" has the power it does over my mind?! I believe it was the same for my mom; though we never talked about it. Somehow the shock and awe to word enema had for her became instilled in me.

@EmomCould it now be "carrying the can" ...or ...as Suzi Quatro once sung ... Can the Can

Thanks for that bit of inspiration. I'll now call it "Caressing the can."! lol

@Nurse_Nikki

I’d tell him “It’s time to clean your pipes out”. He’d give me a whimsical look like “Yeah right”, then I’d shoot back a look 👀 and raise my brow like I’m serious. This is when his face would get a little red like “Oh no, she really is going to clean my ass out tonight.”

I love your words and your husband's reaction.

@Emom

"Romancing the red bag" was a euphemism that I have not only found amusing but have adopted. .

Romancing the bag -- that will work nicely and I plan to use both phrases in the not-too-distant future.

Besides myself, I’ve known a number of women for whom the word “enema” provokes a visceral reaction.

My wife, who’s a great administrator but not really a klismo, says the “e” word is like kryptonite to me. Immediately, my breathing deepens.

Years ago, pre- Internet, we placed an ad in the now-defunct Boston Phoenix alternative newspaper that read:

“ENEMA – just the sound of the word turns on the woman we seek...” To our delight, about a dozen women responded. And we gave enemas to most of them.

Yes, there are euphemisms, and some are creative and even entertaining. But it seems they're primarily employed just to mask the power of the original word: enema.

Having required frequent "physical therapy" visits post surgery, it was often said to be effective when in the company of others who were inquisitive. I certainly felt much better afterward.

Eventually, the term "major physical therapy" was used to plan for plenty of time to accomplish the total R&R session that included the aspects of regular PT as well as enemas, massage, and other manipulations that enhanced the ultimate outcome.

Inquiring minds were none the wiser.