Why might anyone want to undergo such an embarrassing and potentially uncomfortable thing as an enema?

The number one reason is to cleanse the lower digestive tract so that it can better do its proper work and to keep your intestines from becoming analogous to a toxic-waste dump. If you have not undergone a cleansing in some time, there can be several pounds of old, hardened fecal material perpetually stuck to the colon walls, a source of putrefaction and poisoning to the system. I know of people who have seen corn kernels come from their colons months after the last time they had eaten any corn. Enema myth number 1 is that nature didn't design the human excretory system with a means for injecting water, and that, therefore, cleansing the colon is unnecessary and harmful. Nature didn't provide us with brushes on the tips of our fingers either, but only a dodo would argue that this proves that humans ought never to brush their teeth. We live in a day of processed foods, chemical additives, starches and fatty meats. Unlike our ancestors, we get little in roughage from fruits, whole grains and raw vegetables. In this environment, colon cleansing is only common sense.

A second benefit of enemas is that, done correctly, they can provide unique sexual stimulation. We will deal with the how and why of this phenomenon later. For now, suffice it to state that this is a fact. In addition to being a possible main course, en enema can be the appetizer before an entree of anal intercourse. The fear of being dirty inside is listed even more often than a fear of pain as the major obstacle to a woman's receptivity to their man's anal advances. Many anally erotic women have discovered that the enema, taken in preparation to giving themselves to their man, becomes a stimulating part of the ritual of anal sex. It not only cleans them and puts their minds at ease, it relaxes their muscles and puts them in the mood.

Women do not own a monopoly on the ability to derive erotic pleasure from an enema. Men, too, find them a distinct turn-on. For the couple that mutually discover this source of sexual stimulation, the experience can provide a bond of common ground in which the woman can share with her man some of the inner feelings she experiences when penetrated and filled with him.

That is not to say that taking an enema is in the same league with jerking off, slipping a vibrator over your trigger, or having intercourse with your honey. The pleasures of an enema are more subtle, and they are tinged with pain, embarrassment, possibly humiliation. You have to be somewhat of a philosophical, contemplative type to appreciate the subtle interplay between all the seemingly contradictory things that happen during an enema session. And it generally takes more than one try to really learn the ins and outs of the game. It also takes more than one enema to equal a really good session, or an effective cleaning, for that matter. I would say that enemas are an acquired taste, but that might strike some as an extremely poor choice of metaphors.

So, given that colon cleansing can by beneficial to your health and an exciting plus to your love life, how should you do it. The good news is that the process is actually quite simple. The even better news is that, done properly, you might just discover a subtle tinge of pleasure in the operation. A doctor, in a book on health care, wrote that enemas ought never be given to adults because many find them erotically stimulating. Am I missing something? Where is the problem here? It's fortunate for him that his mother didn't avoid all activities that can be erotically stimulating. If she had, he most certainly wouldn't exist!

Here's what to do to explore this thrilling health initiative.

Go to the drugstore and check for enema/douche syringes in the feminine hygiene section. There are several practical options, and some others to avoid. You can opt for the combination water bottle/syringe or the classical open mouth variety. The open mouth is a bit easier to fill and use, but it only serves the one purpose as a syringe. The combination style is more complicated to fill, but it is dual purpose and it also is safer to use in bed since, if it falls from its hanger, it won't spill. The choice is yours. I have one of each because I do like to occasionally use one in bed.

Steer clear of the travel style that folds into a small carrying pouch. They are made from very thin rubber, and do not last long. When they fail, it is usually due to the hanger eyelet tearing loose from the bag. Murphy's law # 13. This NEVER happens at a desirable time or place. They are OK for their intended use, but not regular service. Also avoid the squeeze-bulb douche syringe. It's messy to use and holds so little fluid that a good enema requires multiple fillings and insertions. The Shy douche syringe is an interesting variant, but difficult to use and impossibly leaky when taken outside a bathtub.

If possible, get a kit that has barb fittings instead of the screw in type. The screw in fittings are often poorly made and must be sealed with a medical grade of RTV sealant to prevent leakage. Before purchasing, inspect the quality of the fittings. Are the outlet holes in the douche nozzle (the 6" long one with four flutes on the business end) cleanly drilled and free from burrs or sharp edges? Walgreens tends to carry lousy quality bags. Skip them. . Oh, and you might want to take a few Valium before you launch into the informed consumer act. I n a crowded store, opening enema syringes and inspecting the holes in the douche nozzle can draw stares.

While you're in the drug store, pick up either some petroleum jelly lubricant or some pure vitamin E oil. Water based lubricants such as KY Jelly may be used, but tend to leach away in the water you're injecting. By the end of the process, if the lubricant has washed away, withdrawing the nozzle may be needlessly uncomfortable.

With equipment in hand you are ready to proceed. You need to select the nozzle you'll use. The instructions recommend the short one for enemas, but the douche pipe is the favorite of every enemaniac I know. Assemble the syringe with the selected nozzle as shown in the instructions. Be sure to slide the shut-off clamp onto the hose before fitting the hose to the nozzle and bag. Best is to position the shut-off clamp a few inches from the nozzle with the end you press facing toward the nozzle.

For a solution, use cool to warm water, just a bit above body temperature. Temperature can be varied to produce specific results. Warmer solutions relax the colon muscles, making retention easier, but sometimes rendering expulsion a bit of a challenge. Cool enemas stimulate the peristaltic motion of the bowel muscles, and tend to produce more cramping. Therefore, warm enemas are best for treating nervous conditions, and cool ones are in order to cleanse the colon of old, hardened wastes. Cool enemas are also useful in reducing fevers. Do not use water that is hot. Your inner parts, with their meager supply of nerve endings, will not sense the heat. You can easily fill yourself with water hot enough to put you at risk of heat prostration. Sometimes masochists use cold enemas of ice water to induce heavy cramping. You should exercise common sense in this area as well. Excessive use of ice-water enemas can dangerously depress the core temperature of your body, sending you into shock. Play hard, if you will, but do play safe.

Some people add a tablespoon of baking soda and a teaspoon of salt per quart. The soda and salt bring the enema solution close to your own electrolyte level, so that osmosis through the intestinal membranes is minimized. If you find that you feel a bit light- headed after the process due to a rapid change in blood electrolyte balance, then the salt and soda are in order. I find that plain water works fine for me.

A mild soap such as ivory or pure castille may be added to boost the cleaning power of the enema. The soap offers a double whammy, since it irritates the colon walls and causes a strong urge to purge.

Some theorists have questioned the efficacy of soap, pointing out that there is no research proving that it aids the cleansing action of an enema. With all the science behind the use of surfactants, I don't think an experiment is needed to establish their effectiveness in cleaning. Surfactant is a five dollar word for the the main ingredient in the detergents that we use in our dishwashers, shampoos, laundries, car washes and the list goes on. It is the surfactant (From: surface active agent, a material that breaks down the surface tension of water) in soap that lets it clean greasy hands that plain water won't touch. Water, the closest thing we have to a universal solvent, does the actual cleaning. The wetting agent just breaks the surface tension of the water so it can penetrate to clean. Thus, surfactants are particularly effective on greasy or waxy deposits where plain water would tend to bead up.

Some folks experiment with all sorts of exotic solutions. Curiosity is certainly part of human nature. Remember, though, that curiosity killed the cat, and that, unlike felines, you don't have nine lives. Of particular concern is the use of alcoholic beverages as enemas. The colon is extremely efficient at extracting alcohol from its contents, and transferring it to the blood stream. Your bowels will hold enough alcohol to kill you many times over. If you want to kill yourself, be kind to the poor souls who will have to clean up after you and do it some other way. To be safe, you should divide the amount of alcohol you would feel safe drinking in half, and use no more than that rectally. Mineral oil or olive oil is also occasionally used. This is not a good idea, since these oils can deplete the body's supply of certain oil-based vitamins. Herbal enemas can be of benefit in treating disease, tonifying the body, or making the entire experience more pleasant. See the separate chapter on herbs for a more complete discussion.

Whatever the solution, two quarts is sufficient to fill the colon of most people. To cleanse the entire intestinal tract, multiple four quart fillings and a good deal of iron-clad willpower are required. The four quart procedure, called the high enema, is done till most of the water returns clear. It is virtually impossible to get so clean that the last little bit is clear, so don't be misguided by books that ask for that. While you are still at the sink, place the bag on a towel rack, hold the nozzle over the sink, and briefly open the clamp to expel all air bubbles from the hose. If some air remains, it won't hurt you, but it does make retention more difficult, and it can also generate some shameful sounds during your expulsion. After the bag is filled and primed, grease the nozzle liberally with the lubricant of your choice.

Some people find it difficult to accept and retain a large enema. Volume is useful both for the cleansing and erogenous benefits of the enema, so it is worthwhile to figure out how to hold your own with the real enema pros. One trick is to take a 16 ounce glass of water with a tablespoon of Epsom salts dissolved in it. This should be taken about two hours before going to bed. For the next hour, drink as much water as you can. Stop the treatment 1 hour before retiring, and get a good 8 hours of restful sleep. This treatment will purge your system of all that might stand in the way of the water. The rest is essential, though. The treatment may not work if done during the day of the enema series.

At the very least, if you plan to do a high-enema series, take a 2 quart enema of tepid water first to clear all the large fecal waste from the colon. This will take some of the edge off the four quart behemoths.

Now you need to decide the position you'd like to use. Various medicos pontificate about this and that position, but there appears to be virtually no research to support any of the verbiage, so I'd let comfort and pleasure be my guide. You can lie on a bed with a towel under you to catch leaks. If you're a big-time leaker, you'll want to put a rubber sheet under the towel.

If you choose to lie down, there is a bit of information about anatomy that is worth the knowing. Your descending colon proceeds upward from your anus along the left side of your abdominal cavity to a point just below your rib cage. From there, it makes a sharp bend and runs across the top of your stomach to your right side, around the spot where the appendix is located. This section is called the transverse colon. It then bends again and drops down your right side to a point near the groin. From there, it connects with the long, thin tube called the small intestine.

Now, knowing this, you can select a reclining position that will ease the filling of each third of the colon. Start out lying on your left side. Massage upward along the left side of your abdomen from groin to ribcage to help the water fill this first third of the colon. When that part feels full, roll over on your back to allow the transverse colon to fill. Extend your massage from the beginning of the descending and along the full length of the transverse colon. Finally, when the transverse section is full, roll onto your right side to let the ascending section get the maximum water pressure. Simultaneously, you can extend your massage to follow the full route of the colon, starting at the entry end and pushing the water ever deeper into the bowels. Believe it or not, with a little practice, you can feel each section as it fills.

You can stand in the shower if the reclining position doesn't suit you. I find I can hold more standing than in any other position. Lots of female enema fans I know love to get up on the bed on their knees with their face down on the sheets. They enjoy the submissiveness of this pose and the powerful visual effect it has on their significant other. Experiment a bit and see what tickles your fancy. If you have to do this anyway, you might as well derive the maximum of erotic enjoyment from it.

Most books recommend the bag be placed about 2 feet above the hips. This does provide sufficient force to get 2 quarts into you. The bag will need to be hung a bit higher for a four quart high- enema. Enema myth number 2. Some books warn of excessive pressure, but the truth is that your anal sphincter will generally not hold more than you can safely take. However, learn your limits. A high enema should hurt so good. You will feel incredibly full. Your belly will bulge out as if you're three months pregnant. But the process should never really, seriously hurt. If it feels like you're going to burst, stop and expel before you do.

Once you are in your selected position with the bag hung securely at a correct distance above you, lubricate yourself well, ease the nozzle a few inches into your rectum and open the clamp. If you begin to feel too full or cramping sets in, briefly shut the flow off until the feeling subsides. Then you may restart the flow.

Another piece of anatomy news that's important to male enjoyment of enemas. Just inside the body, positioned between the rectum and the urethra, lies the prostate gland. It is responsible for generating most of the fluid contained in male ejaculate. It is a sensitive little gland. Stimulation of it alone can trigger an orgasm. This is why so many enema loving men prefer the douche nozzle and hang the bag 3 feet or more above the hips. The spray from the side outlets figures strongly in male enema appreciation. By twisting the douche nozzle and positioning it just right, it is possible to direct the spray from two sets of the outlet holes directly against the prostate, and this feels wonderful!

Both males and females will find that the muscles around the anal ring are tightly linked to the muscles of the pubic floor. That is the muscle that spasms so delightfully during an orgasm. Stimulation back there, provided it is not brutal and painful, will echo in the frontal zone with truly spine tingling results.

After you are filled you should try to retain the water for as long as possible. At least five minutes, and preferably fifteen, will give the water time to soften and remove hardened fecal matter clinging to the walls of and clogging the folds in the colon. Most folks who find the process erotically stimulating notice that playing with themselves a little helps keep their mind off any cramping that occurs while they fill up and as they wait for the water to do its work. Try to just climb the mountain of delight, but not go over the lover's leap into the oblivion below. The release of the sexual tension often hastens the release of the pressure building in your belly, and cuts short the water's cleansing work. Why spoil a good thing? Save all the tension till the last filling.

If and when you do plan to hit that final crescendo, be aware that that muscle that spasms when you orgasm also controls your anal sphincter. As it does its dance of delight, it will probably release little bursts of the pressing flood in your innards. Consequently, unless you are hankering to do an impression of a Super Soaker 2000, you want to be aware of your position relative to the plumbing as the time draws nigh.

When you must release the water, sit on the toilet and let it run out. Do the same full-colon massage you did while taking the water in, but reverse the direction now, working from your right groin up the ascending colon, from right to left along the transverse colon, then down the descending colon from ribs to groin on your left abdomen. Use a firm stroke of the heel of your palm and force the water back out of your system. If you selected vitamin E oil as a lubricant, dab some on the tummy to make this process more pleasant. This massage helps clear the water quickly and is useful in loosening caked on and hardened wastes. You may not be able to expel the last little bit of water, sit and strain as you may. A sure fire way to resolve this is to clean yourself and get up. The more encumbered you become with activities that would make a return to the toilet inconvenient, the better this strategy seems to work.

Most of the folks who have discovered the pleasure of this practice stumbled upon it in the course of medical procedures given by professional health-care persons, parents or self inflicted. So, if this has a health benefit and is sexually arousing, a natural question to ask is, "How often can I safely do it." Again, the medical literature is thin and what little there is simple opinion and prejudice, about as helpful as the justifications for bleeding patients of centuries past. Enema myth number 3. Beware of them, they're addictive. The truth from my own experience is that enemas can be somewhat addictive. After a daily dose for a number of days, the colon takes a few days to recover normal function. During this recovery, you can get pretty bloated and uncomfortable. However, I have spent several years taking them daily and been able to easily end the cycle with a couple of small ones to get me through the withdrawal. The biggest problem with needing one every day is that there will be days when travel or time commitments make an enema bloody inconvenient at best. Expulsion is noisy and smelly. Unless yours is very different from mine, you might not feel comfortable taking an enema while staying over at your mother-in-law's house. If you are staying for a week and can't go without the bag, the resultant constipation can put a cramp in more than just your style.

Another curiosity that arises after you discover the pleasure of enemas is the linkage between pain and pleasure. Some enema enthusiasts, myself included, find that very large, painful and rather humiliating enemas are the ultimate enema turn-on. So, if you discover that cramps hurt so good, how can you produce them? Here is a suggestion from another enemaholic.

jmelson@artsci.wustl.edu (Jonathan M. Elson) I think some of your questions have already been answered, but I will try, too. Maybe you can't experience *real* cramps with less than a quart. So, you'll have to get a "good cleaning out" first, and then try to get a little more fluid in. I might recommend a warm, soapy enema first. Make it warmer than body temperature, about 104 F (39 - 40 C), since the water cools off in the bag and tube before flowing into you. The warmth helps relax the bowels so you can accept a little more water. Take it slowly, lying on your back, with the bag no more than 1 or 2 feet above you. When you feel the pressure build, clamp the hose and massage your tummy where you feel the pressure, until you feel that area relax. Then take a little more water. As for the soap, use either Ivory bar soap or castille soap sparingly for your first irrigation. With ivory, just hold the bar in the stream of water filling the bag. The slower the water flows over the soap, the stronger the mixture. For castille soap, there is liquid and bar. Kirk's hardwater castille (bar) soap dissolves very fast, so don't hold it in the water for the full time the bag fills. Liquid castille soap is very strong, so just use a little bit. The castille is a little more irritating to (at least my ) bowel.

Now, after you get cleaned out is when the fun can begin! With a clean bowel, you can get a lot more fluid in, and if cramps are what you want, you can most certainly get bigger cramps with a bigger colon! I would recommend a warm enema with strong castille soap for a good cramp. And, as long as the soap is not too strong, I don't think you need to worry about harm. After all, castille soap enemas have been given in hospitals for at least 100 years.

Of course, if you want *real* cramps, you can mix air and water. This WILL give you cramps - I mean real excruciating pain! I don't know if this is what you are looking for, but I know that on the few occasions when I had some problem with my equipment and injected air into my colon with an enema, it really hurt. If you want to try this, you might take an enema, and then have your "mistress" take the hose apart at the bag end, and blow into it. You'll hear the air bubbles rumble into you, and pretty soon you will feel real cramps. I warn you, however, that expelling an air/water enema is much more difficult than any water enema you have had. You may have to lay in the tub on your back to get it to come out, and you may have to work on it for an hour or more to get the air and water out and the cramps to subside.

If you're using enemas for preparation for anal intercourse, I'd recommend giving your partner several. Start with one to two quarts, then build up to the point comfort defines. Give several, till the returns are mostly clean till the very end. This way, there won't be any sludge in the way. Enemas are a subtle erotic stimulation, and it often takes several before you really begin to feel the sexiness. They're nothing at all like beating off or fucking, which are anything but subtle. One caution. A series of large enemas can be physically as well as rectally draining. You might want to match your partner 1 for 1. Do each other, with lots of playful stroking, kissing, licking and so on throughout. That way, nobody feels used and abused, and you each have a clear indication of how worn out you're getting. Enjoy.