Renee hadn’t slept well all night. Not because she was feeling bad, but because she was excited about what was going to take place that day. She was finally going to start her potty training session, the two month period that every girl at Warren academy went through before being released. Renee couldn’t wait to have control over her own body again, and she shifted restlessly in her crib in the darkness.

Her diaper was both wet and messy, and as she shifted her legs, she could feel the soft, hot bulge slide around on her butt cheeks, the mess getting softer by the hour as her bladder released stream after stream of wetness into the thick padding between her legs. She tried imagining what it would be like to have normal control again, and every time her bladder released a trickle of warm pee into her diaper, she tried to clench down on the flow. Of course she was unsuccessful, but she hadn’t even expected success--with the hourglass-shaped silicon tube that held her bladder open like a leaky faucet, it was quite literally impossible to squeeze shut. Doing her best to ignore the poopy mess that she lay in, she concentrated on getting a couple of more hours of sleep before wakeup time.

Soon after she dozed off, she dreamt that she was home again, but she was still in diapers. All of her family was there as well, but they all seemed to unaware of what she was wearing. But with the common uncertainty and unpredictability of dreams, that all changed suddenly and then everybody was laughing and pointing at her diapered bottom. She began to wet herself, which only made her family laugh harder. With a soft cry of sorrow, Renee jerked awake. She was confused for a moment, and wasn’t quite sure where she was, but as she sat up, the now cold squishy mess in her diaper squished up between her legs, and she was instantly reminded of where she was at.

She could tell that it was past wakeup time, all the other girls in her room were no longer there, and yawning and stretching, she eased out of her crib and waddled out of the room towards the diaper changing room. When she got there, she was lucky enough to get a changing table right away, so she lay down and stuck her legs up in the calf cups and waited for the nurse to come by.

It didn’t take very long, and as the woman approached her, she spoke. "You’re Renee Dupree are you not?" She asked.

"Yes, ma’am."

"Well it says here that we’re supposed to take out your shunt today. Just wait here, and I’ll go get the equipment I need."

Renee just nodded, and the nurse went off to get a rolling cart with the catheter-like tool she would need to take the shunt out. The nurse came back again shortly with the rolling cart and another diaper. It made sense that they would still make her wear diapers at least for a little while longer until she was able to regain control again. She figured that just like with potty training toddlers, she would have a few accidents before she got it right. "You’ll still have to wear diapers at least for the next tow weeks," the nurse said, confirming Renee’s speculation, "you’ll still be having a lot of accidents during that time, probably longer, but most girls are able to keep their pants dry and clean by the end of the two month training period. Most of them." She added. "It’ll be pretty much like it’s always been for these next two months, except now you have access to the potty room whenever you feel like you can make it in time."

The nurse didn’t talk much for the rest of the procedure. She cleaned Renee up first, then inserted the catheter tubing into her urethra. It was uncomfortable, but she was glad to be getting this damn tiny piece of plastic out of her body that had managed to change her life completely for almost the past two years. With something that felt like a pop, the thing was out, and the nurse began to pull out the tubing that would begin the ending of her diapered confinement.

"That’s it kiddo." The nurse said. "Your last muscle paralyzer shot was last week, so you should have bowel control in a few days, but you still have a few accidents for maybe a month or more, that’s the average time, anyway. Now let’s get you back in diapers before you leak onto the table."

A little later, Renee tried squeezing her bladder muscles, but it only caused her to release a stream of pee into the diaper that was being taped onto her. She tried squeezing harder, after all she could feel the muscle now that the shunt was out, but it was atrophied after two years of misuse, and it would take time for her to regain even marginal movement in that area. She continued to wet her diaper even as the nurse finished taping her in. The woman seemed not to notice, nor even care about Renee’s accident. It was no big deal to Renee though, she was used to accidents like that, it was a very common, everyday event.

But now that she was free of the restrictions put on her, she was determined to regain control of her own body again, no matter how long it took. Renee hopped off the changing table with a better mood than she’d had in quite some time. She was already wet, but it didn’t bother her. She even welcomed the familiar feel of warm, wet diaper padding between her legs. Though she was eager to get back into her normal life again, she had grown somewhat accustomed to her diapered captivity, and she felt that she might even miss the close, personal attention that was placed on her on a daily basis. It was almost like growing up again for her, once again pushed out into the world where she would have to fend for herself, again.

She decided to wear just a T-shirt, her sneakers, and her diaper for the rest of the day. Most of the girls that had been in as long as she had did the same thing, no longer caring about their modest state—humility had become an outdated concept for most of the girls over a year earlier.

Renee decided that her ‘promotion’ as it were needed to be shared with someone, the only person she had managed to get close to at the academy, her friend Rachel. She walked to the play room where Rachel could usually be found watching tv. On the way there she began to wet herself again, and tried clamping down on the flow. She could feel the slightest bit of resistance as her bladder added more wetness to her diaper, but she might as well have had the shunt back in because she still had no control at all. This is going to take some time. She thought.

Renee suddenly found that she was torn between the need to regain normal bodily control, and the desire to stay in diapers and play baby. She had decided a while back that even after she left the academy, she would wear diapers for fun whenever she could.

When she waddled through the playroom door, she accepted a bottle from the guard sitting there, it was juice this time, and scanned the large room for her friend. Renee didn’t see her, she was probably either in her room, eating, or having her diaper changed. It was ok, she though, she would wait.

There were a number of empty bean bag chairs scattered around in front of the large screen tv like huge, colorful piles of modeling clay. She pulled two of them together, and laid down on them to watch some tv and wait for her Rachel to show up. She felt between her legs, and found that while she had already had two relatively small accidents, they were hardly noticeable through the thick padding. She figured that she would have to wet at least one more time before the wetness could be seen under the thin layer of plastic. She continued to think about it for a little while longer, her mind eventually straying to other things. Sucking on her bottle and watching the childish programming on the large television set, she managed to doze off into a light sleep. She dreamt that she was back in school again, and that she had just peed in her pants in front of her whole homeroom class during the middle of a presentation. She woke an hour later with dried, crusty tear streaks on her face.

11/07/02

Renee woke the next morning feeling rested and content. She’d had a dreamless sleep, and slept so soundly that she didn’t even wake up when she deposited the very large mound of poop into her diaper that now clung to her bottom like soft, tepid mud. She pushed downwards on her lower abdomen, which made her bladder release a stream of pee into the damp padding. It had been an average night for wetting, but the overnight diapers used at the academy were the thickest diapers in the world, and one would have to literally pee more than a quart before they started leaking. Renee had never even come close to leaking, except that one time last year when she got sick, and spent most of the night squirting loose, hot gushes of diarrhea into her diapers. Luckily a nurse had come by twice that night to change her, otherwise she would have easily become a leaking well of lumpy, foul smelling water.

She sat up and stretched her sleep-stiff arms. The pressure on her bladder as she sat up made her wet again, and her bottom slid over the still warm mess in her diaper, tickling her sensitive skin as it squirted forward between her legs. But she ignored it all, as she swung her legs over the edge of her crib and slid off the mattress, landing clumsily on her feet. All she wanted to do right now, she thought as she waddled out of her room into the large main corridor, was to get a hot shower and get cleaned up. She hated the way she smelled when she pooped in her diapers, or when anybody else did it for that matter. To take her mind off of it, she concentrated on squeezing her bladder and bowel muscles. They were both still incredibly weak, almost to the point of complete atrophy, but she could feel the tiniest amount of movement when she willed her mind to her bidding. She got her diaper changed in relatively good time, and after taking her morning shower, she rediapered, and headed to the dining room for breakfast. She ate breakfast with Rachel, who by the way was two weeks away from her graduation potty training. She had been sitting in her high chair already happily munching on bacon and toast when Renee walked in.

It was Saturday morning, and the girls of Warren academy were dressed in whatever casual manner that they chose - one of the small freedoms at the prison-school - and nobody chose to wear their school uniforms. Rachel had opted for staying in her pink footed sleeper, and Renee was content with her usual t-shirt, white slip on sneakers, and a diaper as had become the norm for her in the past few months. Rachel was much more modest, and usually wore clothes that completely concealed her diapers. Renee could understand, but as for herself, she could really care less anymore, it wasn’t as if she was hiding anything anyway. At any given point during the day, her private parts were exposed to any number of people. Privacy was something that had never had a home at Warren academy.

Renee sat down in the high chair next to her and waited for her own breakfast. The two girls chatted as they ate, and finished together. Once they were done, they headed out back to the gardens to play checkers for a while. They stayed outside for a few hours, soaking in some sun. It was springtime and the warm weather felt heavenly after the long winter, mostly indoors. They were not allowed to leave the academy compound, and with the bad winter that had hung over the countryside all winter long, most of their entertainment for the past three months had come mostly from books, games and tv. They played as many games as they could, not really wanting to go back inside again, but they were both wet, and at least Renee was in very obvious need of a diaper change. The padding under the thin layer of plastic was visibly sodden and was bunched up between her legs from hours of wear. She knew that Rachel was in exactly the same boat under her sleeper, and she could even smell the evidence of what was probably a small messy accident. Renee hadn’t had a messy diaper all day, but she knew that would not last for long. Although expecting the probable failure, she was almost anxious to see if she could hold it in long enough to walk to the toilets. The two girls finished their game before they packed it all up - Rachel won - and waddled back to the spacious mansion, both with heavy, drooping diapers hanging diligently from their hips.

11/10/02

Though she was not allowed to hover around the corridors around the toilets, Renee had tried her best to be prepared to jump up at a moments notice and make the small journey to her first steps towards freedom. Right on schedule, just like every other day around this time, Renee felt the sudden urgent need to poop.

She had been playing a video game when it hit. She had been literally sitting on the edge of her seat in anticipation. Her plan was to jump up at the first sign of any approaching urges, but this one had hit her so suddenly, without any warning. She had also gotten involved in her game, and she didn’t recognize what was happening until it was too late. Just as she managed to kill off the last of the Imperial TIE-Fighters, the results of the previous nights dinner filled her rectum demanding instant release. Renee knew she would not make it as soon as she began to stand up. With a mercifully quiet squelching sound, the hot, oatmeal-textured mess pushed itself out in lumpy spurts that filled the space between her bottom and her diaper. Finding that it had little space available, the mess began to expand in a forward moving flow. She’d always compared this feeling to a pile of hot mud suddenly appearing under her bottom.

Despite her failure, she was not disappointed, instead, she simply enjoyed it. She sat back down in the newly formed mound. The soft, lumpy mess shifted around on her bare skin, the little bubbles of trapped air running up her skin giving her goosebumps. Even if she didn’t have to wait another forty-five minutes for another diaper change, she probably would have stayed where she was. Over time, she had come to enjoy the feeling of her messy accidents. Rachel could obviously hear what had just happened, but she ignored it as she played her own game.

Renee realized that she would have to let go of the diapers to get back into her normal life again. They had become a source of security for her in the past two years, and it would be like giving up a part of her life. But if she didn’t get over her desire to keep living a life as a big baby, she knew she would never be able to train her muscles to do what she wanted them to do. She wondered if any of the other girls felt the same way she did.

The time finally came for her to get changed, and told Rachel she would be back soon. She tried her best to ignore the mess that clung to her bottom, and to not let it make her horny like it usually did. Her diaper was changed, and after going back to the playroom to retrieve her friend, they both went to eat dinner.

It was a typically quiet night, and they both parted ways and went to bed. Renee thought about how long it would take to be free of diapers, and fell asleep with that thought running through her head. She did not dream.