The Enema Primer
Chapter 5, How to turn your lover into enema lover
I have been moved to tears reading some of the e-mail I get from members and prospective members of the E-SIG (our enema-erotic special interest group). There are so many enema lovers who are lonely, frustrated, isolated. There are so many who are convinced that that's the way things have to stay. Horse puckey. It ain't necessarily so.
Some time ago, the E-SIG gathered the seduction plans and success stories of our members. We asked for more ideas on the Internet. Out of that effort, and my reading, this document has grown. Here's the bottom line. If you are attractive and articulate enough to interest another human being in a relationship, and if you will study these methods and put them to work, you can teach your mate to share in your passion for erotic enemas. Here is how.
BE SELFLESSLY LOVING Most attempts fail because they are correctly perceived by the mate as selfish manipulation.
Read 1st Corinthians 13, meditatively, 3 times per day for 30 days. NOTE: In English, we overuse the word, Love. A person can love their dog, love their car, make love, fall in love, love it up. Love is sometimes taken to mean sexual union, but when someone loves their car, this is usually not what is implied. In Greek (the language that 1 Cor. was written in, there are 3 separate words to describe differing aspects of love. Eros speaks of sexual love or lust. Phileo is about brotherly love, friendship. Philadelphia, the city of brotherly love, takes its name, if not its cultural ethos, from Phileo. But the highest form of love, agape, is unique. It is God's love for us, the unlovely. It is a love so pure and sincere that it is not based on any beauty or merit within the object it is lavished upon. It depends for its existence only on the nature of the lover, not the lovee. It might be called will-power love. Agape is love based not on performance of the object of affection but on the flint-faced decision to love, no matter what. This is the love that 1st Corinthians shows so eloquently in action. It is the love that, if we adopt it, will give us the patience and perseverance to win love from the object of our affection. It is the love that is the antithesis of the way of this world. By coming to understand God's unconditional love for us, and, as we understand it, reflecting it absolutely toward our mate, we can break down the barriers of fear that keep us from sharing and meeting each other's inner needs. Note that some translations render the Greek agape as charity, just so it won't be confused with the baser meanings attached to the English word, love. For our purposes, however, the better choice is "Love," but with a full understanding of the tremendous magnitude of the word. Try reading 1 Cor. 13, not just in sing-song fashion, but meditatively, three times a day, for thirty days. See what a change it brings about. You won't be the same person, and neither will your lover.
PUT PRIORITY ON SEDUCTION Having an open, sharing relationship where you are appreciated for your true self is IMPORTANT. Decide for yourself that this is true, then share that view with your mate. Share it often. Take the time necessary to make it happen. Plan it as you would if you were preparing for a major career move or the construction of a new spec home. Make it a priority. Write up a plan for your seduction, covering major objectives and minute steps to achieve them. Work very slowly, one step at a time.
KNOW YOUR ENEMA ENEMY Recognize our culture's taboo re anal area and functions. Unless they grew up alone on a desert island, your SO has almost certainly been steeped in the teaching that the anus is dirty. It's disgusting. It's unclean. It's ugly. It's probably full of every horrible disease. You shouldn't even look at it, and certainly never touch it. These messages are conveyed to very young children by parents, friends and caregivers. They are taught long before the child can consciously debate the information and decide personally whether it is rational or not. Thus, taboo operates beneath the conscious level, and is very difficult to attack with logic.
I mean how rational can it be to believe that you should never never touch your anus when its part of you? Try as you may to avoid it, you're touching it all the time. Is it reasonable to believe that shit would pollute the end of your finger beyond salvation when you walk around day after day with a load of shit inside you?
In setting your plans for bringing your partner into enema fun, figure out how strong their anal taboo feelings are. What do they think is OK and what do they think is NOT OK? Build a strategy to break down the taboo.
BE CONFIDENT ENEMAS ARE OK One great roadblock to presenting enema eroticism in a positive light is the negative feeling that we may have locked away in our own hearts. Here is a write-up on anal sex, looking at the rightness, morality, safety and so forth of back-door loving. What it says applies equally well to enema sex. Look it over. Sort out your own thoughts. Make sure you don't have unnecessary guilt weighing you down as you attempt to climb the mountain of enema seduction. Once you have the thing settled in your own mind, learn how to help your mate overcome their feelings of shame and guilt.
Anal intercourse can be a source of great pleasure for both participants. As a transsexual who has been on both ends of it, I am in a position to say so. It can also hurt like a Drano enema if you don't know what you are doing. Again, personal experience testifies. How do you find out what to do? Unfortunately, the ranks of anal experts are slim indeed among heterosexual Americans. Why shouldn't they be? After all, we're talking about a form of sexual expression that was, in many states in the near past, and still is in some, illegal even for a husband and wife to practice. We're dealing with an aspect of sexuality that cannot be mentioned in most circles. If you have problems with the missionary position, you can go to a marriage counselor, a doctor or even your pastor, and probably get pretty good advice. After all, unless you pick a priest, you are probably asking about something this individual has directly experienced. I wouldn't even rule the priest out of this category. Altogether different if you go ask a minister how to butt-fuck!
That's why the first step along the Hershey highway to marital bliss needs to be an examination of fears and guilt. Did God really intend to give 12 commandments, including thou shalt not know thy wife in her anal opening and thou shalt not know thy wife by means of your mouth? Did Moses accidentally break the tablets as he was descending Mount Hor, and deprive the whole world of these last 2 strictures? Did he deliberately crack off that part of the inscription because he was a closet butt-fucker and cunt licker himself? Probably not. If God is whom He claims, in His word, to be, then He is more than capable of getting His word inscribed accurately by puny man. If He's not who He claims to be, then why worry about what His word says anyway?
No! In truth, you can search the Word of God from one cover to the other, and you'll find not a jot or a tittle prohibiting our using the bodies we were given to afford our married partner pleasure. Here's what you will find. Col 3:18 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 3:19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. And this: 1 Cor 7:3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 7:4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 7:5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. And this: Heb. 13:4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. All quotations are from The Living Bible.
You will hear preachers and moralists rave against the evils of everything sexual, but that just doesn't jibe with the Word they claim to be expounding. God clearly prohibits sexual immorality, homosexuality, cross-dressing, sex with animals, witchcraft, adultery and fornication. God says not a word about which holes husbands and wives should apply to which appurtenances in order to pleasure themselves. Apparently, He was content to let each married pair work that out on their own. So go over that in your head. Read through the scriptures of your belief. If you are troubled that anal sex is somehow sinful, the first step to pleasure on the Hershey highway is letting go of the misguided sense of guilt. When it comes to backdoor sex (or erotic enemas), the sin idea comes from uptight men and women, not from God.
Let me digress a moment before the flames appear in droves. I list the prohibitions around sexual behavior not to condemn anyone, but to tell you frankly what is and isn't sin according to the Word of God. Remember that I am a self confessed transsexual who's had carnal contact with men. I am guilty of every "Thou shall not" except bestiality, which never really appealed to me anyway, or I'd probably have done that too. Fortunately, the same document that condemned my behavior held a most marvelous plan of redemption that was powerful enough even for the likes of me.
After the shame of sin, the fear of pain or even physical damage is the next great lock holding shut the back door. Again, a little reason and knowledge is the key. First, consider that, when you poop, you are passing something roughly the size of an erect penis through your rectal opening. It doesn't hurt all that bad. Unless a man's cock is huge in girth, anal intercourse should be possible with no more pain or damage than that which you incur from a bowel movement. Granted, if you do it wrong, it can hurt like a root canal. The good news is, you don't have to do it wrong. You can learn how to do it right, and then it can feel very very good, It can even make you cum. (The same goes for enemas. They can deliver intense pain, intense pleasure, or an intoxicating mixture of the two. See the forgoing chapters for a complete discussion of how to do it for health and pleasure.)
"But I have hemorrhoids," you say. So? If you have a mild case, less than that which would suggest a surgical cure, then anal sex might even help. The doctor would most likely prescribe the use of creams and an anal dilator (a set of progressively larger cone shaped dildos). Guess how big the largest cone is. If you said dick sized, give yourself an extra ten points. By the way, you can purchase a set of dilators from a good druggist or medical supply. They make an excellent tool to prepare yourself for losing your anal cherry, and the prep work can be fun in itself. If you do have a serious case of hemorrhoids, consult a proctologist and see if surgery is the answer. If it is, get that and the healing process over with before starting your back-door voyage.
There is one more MAJOR source of inhibition regarding anal eroticism, and this is one we cannot just dismiss as unreasoned prudishness. This is the area of health concerns, and of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). Before we launch into this discussion, let's state the "bottom line" on anal sex and STDs. If approached improperly, anal sex can be dangerous or even deadly. If approached properly, it is as safe as vaginal intercourse and probably safer than most oral sexual contacts. Anal Sex and Health, by Dr. Jack Morin, is an excellent reference on safe anal sex. Its information on this and anal taboos is equally applicable to enema sex. It's available through any major bookseller (in all but large cities, they'll probably have to order it) or you can buy it from Good Vibrations in San Francisco (415) 974-8990 FAX (415) 974- 8989). It's only $12.50 Get it and study it.
WRITTEN GOALS ARE MANDATORY Have a written goal. If you want to introduce your mate to the joys and pleasures you find in enemas, write up this goal. Write it as if it has already happened, and you're describing it. Write lots of detail. Don't just say, my wife is going to love enemas. Say my wife and I thrill to find weekends when we can share in water games. She loves to lie across my lap and let me masturbate her while I fill her rear with hot water. Go on and on. This way, your subconscious mind can go to work on how to make your dreams happen. Your subconscious needs concrete things and feelings to work on, not just a word goal, so visualize how it will be when the goal is achieved.
Rewrite it every morning. Do this first thing, while your mind is still uncluttered with the "Tyranny of the Urgent." "We love to share inner needs and secrets with each other. My mate is so..." Each morning, as you write your goals, visualize how the realized dream will be.
Make sure the first goal you set is believable. If you make $30,000 per year, you probably wouldn't believe yourself if you set a goal to earn $300,000 next year. Better to set a goal to earn 25% more next year. Same thing with your seduction plan. The first step should be a reach, but not an impossible leap. This way, your faith will be strong, and you will believe you will reach the target. Once you've achieved that first step, set a new goal.
An interesting aside on the power of written goals. In a major study, the graduating class of Yale university was surveyed to find out which students consistently set written goals. Only 3% regularly used written goals in their school work. Most of these were top students. But what is truly enlightening is that there was a follow up done 20 years after the graduation. In that follow-up, the 3% who set written goals earned more than the 97% of the Yale graduates who did not! Written goals work! If sharing your love of enemas with your mate is important to you, use written goals.
BE DILIGENT As important as having a great intimacy with your mate is, it is surprising how little effort most of us invest in achieving that goal. Make it a priority. Study and carefully plan and target your approach.
Gather and read health books that advocate enemas. Learn the benefits and how to sell them. There are a number of ailments and complaints that can be improved or altogether eliminated through the correct use of herbal treatments, enemas, and naturopathic programs. If your honey suffers from something that enemas can fix, what better way to introduce them than to do it through a cure. Some good resources are:
Airola, Paavo, Ph.D.; Are You Confused: The Authoritative Answers to Controversial Questions; The doctor sets out, with some degree of success, to provide definitive answers to questions hotly debated among nutritionists. Topics include macrobiotics, fasting, herbs, meats and yes, enemas. There is a clear regimen for daily enemas during a prolonged juice fast.
Bahr, Robert; Good Hands: Massage Techniques for Total Health; Signet Books, New York, NY, 1984. A very thorough and balanced manual on massage. No direct discussion of enemas or colonic cleansing, however.
Kira, Prof. Alexander; The Bathroom; Bantam Books, New York, NY, 1976. In this book, Alexander Kira, Professor of Architecture at Cornell University, tackles a tough subject with minimal fear of taboos. If bathrooms are dear to your heart as they are to many enema fans, this book is worth finding. It is full of suggestions on design improvements and insights into prejudices and taboos surrounding our personal hygiene habits.
Kloss, Jethro; Back to Eden: The Classic Guide to Herbal Medicine, Natural Foods and Home Remedies; New Revised Edition; Back to Eden Books, Loma Linda, CA, 1992 This is a necessity for naturopathic enthusiasts. It includes a few case studies in which Jethro Kloss used enemas and colon cleansings to cure all sorts of maladies. Jethro believed in multiple four quart treatments. The book has been published continuously since 1946 by the Kloss family. A true classic. NOTE: This is not recent medical science but collected lore and wisdom. It is not, by any stretch, an erotic enema treatise. NOTE. Both the original and revised versions are still sold. We recommend, unless you are buying it as a collectable, the revised edition. It is much more logically organized
Malstron, Stan D., Own Your Own Body, Among other things, this book describes a treatment for chronic eczema using enemas, herbs and naturopathy.
Reid, Daniel P.; The Tao of Health, Sex and Longevity: A Modern Practical Guide to the Ancient Way; A Fireside Book, Simon and Schuster, Inc., New York, NY, 1989. This book offers valuable insights into ancient Chinese philosophy and healing arts, along with unresearched opinion on the part of the author. Good discernment is required on the part of the reader in selecting the portions of the text to adopt and those to abort. There is a useful and well-documented discussion of the use of enemas and Colema boards in cleansing of the intestines. The discussions of Taoist opinions on sexuality and marital relations are also worthwhile.
Russell, Stephen and Kolb, Jurgen; The Tao of Sexual Massage; A Fireside Book, Simon and Schuster, Inc., New York, NY, 1992. An interesting discussion of techniques to please a partner and to open the gates of inhibition surrounding our private areas. Sexy illustrations, but be forewarned, this book does not discuss colonic cleansing.
Tierra, Michael, C.A, N.D; The Way of Herbs; Pocket Books, Div. Of Simon and Schuster, Inc., New York, NY, 1990. This is an exhaustive treatise on the use of herbs in cooking and in treating illness. It discusses the enema as a treatment of constipation and a tool for toxin elimination during fasting. It also covers a number of herbal teas and decoctions that might be employed in enemas.
Vogel, Dr. H. C. A., The Nature Doctor: A Manual of Traditional and Complementary Medicine; extensive coverage of naturopathic medicine and a full discussion of the use of enemas in the maintenance of health.
Walker, Norman W, D.Sc., Ph.D.; Colon Health: the Key to a Vibrant Life, Norwalk Press, Prescott, AZ, 1979. As its title suggests, this book totally devotes itself to colon care. It discusses both enemas and colonics, with its emphasis on the later.
The following titles are available through Roy Clark (801) 566-9471 Anderson, Rich, Cleanse and Purify Thyself Curtis, Bud, Remove the Thorn and God Will Heal DuBelle, Lee, Internal Cleansing is and Old Movement Jensen, Dr. Bernard, Tissue Cleansing Through Bowel Management Robinson, Loren C., The Roots of Health Winters, Jason, Killing Cancer Wolfe, Darrel, The Health You Deserve
BE REALISTIC. Forget chasing the Rainbow. Read Super Marital Sex by Paul Pearshall, Ph.D. I know, I know, one more sex manual, you're thinking. Trust me. This one is different. Most sex manuals feature a collection of all the wild things and strained positions possible, with little of help in getting an SO to share them with you. They often contribute to, rather than destroy, one's frustration with a lackluster love life. Super Marital Sex is different. It is written from the perspective that really great sex, truly uninhibited love making, is only established through great intimacy and trust. An extreme of trust and intimacy are required to really open up in enema sex. These things are just not going to come from a casual encounter. Forget finding some perfectly matched enemaholic and having a wild weekend of watersports. It is a self defeating fantasy. If you tied your financial success solely to catching a leprechaun, and demanding his pot of gold, how would your bank account look? Same thing for your love life if you chase a doomed fantasy rather than build on a firm foundation of committed love.
If you are in good enough communication with your mate, read and study Dr. Pearshall's book together. Constantly reassure your lover that you are not just conducting a campaign to have your own way in bed, but that you want to be able to share this important part of who you are. I personally don't feel I can give all of myself to my spouse without sharing my anal eroticism with her. I felt sleazy when I had to sneak off to a motel to play watersports on business trips.
TO E OR NOT TO E, THAT IS THE QUESTION Sex is supposed to be for two, right? Really great, meaningful intimacy demands that sex be for two. If your mate deeply objects to a particular act, it might be best to find other acts that both of you enjoy, and enjoy them together.
On the other hand, that's not always the solution. That's one model of sex, true, but that leaves out an awful lot. It's not always necessary for both partners to actively enjoy every sex act. It's simply necessary for both partners to be able to accept each sex act, and for both partners to get a sufficient supply of the sex that really does turn them on. Sometimes that means that one person will agree to a sex act that really does nothing for them, and find it tremendously pleasurable because they can see how much it means to their partner. If fair is fair, then that person will in turn receive their own 'special' time. Find out what your mate really craves, that does nothing for you. Play "Let's Make a Deal"
DISCOVER THE SEX ORGAN YOU DIDN'T KNOW EXISTED Read about Arnold H. Kegel, M.D. and his work on the pubococcygeous (PCG) muscle. You will find this discussed with sufficient detail in another sex manual, Wake Up in Bed Together, by Drs. Claude and Dorothy Nolte. Read their book together. It explains the function of the PCG (the muscle that supports the pelvic floor, controls closure of the anus, urethra and, in the woman, the vagina, and spasms like gangbusters when you come). What you learn will give you new insights into the enjoyment of enemas, which can be used to stimulate this nerve-rich muscle to the point of orgasm. Encourage your mate (particularly if SO is a female) to exercise the PCG. Also, be sure to carefully read their chapter on anal love.
USE POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT Be quick, but not too obvious, with positive reinforcement. Every time your lover does something that moves toward the anal love you need, give them positive reinforcement. Likewise, every time they open that part of themselves to you, even a little, reward the behavior massively.
EASY DOES IT Let them take their first few enemas for health alone. Remember, you didn't start off as an enema erotic, did you? After they have had a few, ask if they could handle being hugged during the process. Slowly escalate the contact, over a number of sessions. Advance to caressing, fondling, masturbating, the sky's the limit.
E-TALK Talk about it. Describe to them how enemas make you feel. Sell how sexy they are. Explain the physiology of enema eroticism. Tell them how intimate the experience is, how close you would feel if the two of you could share something so deeply personal.
LEAVE SOME NOT-SO-SUBTLE HINTS Be up front with your love of enemas. Leave your bag out in the open in your bath. If you are not already in a relationship, don't go too far in getting to know someone without bringing up the subject and finding out how receptive they may be. How many of us went all the way through getting married before sharing this vital part of our nature? Shame.
DIRECT AND TO THE POINT Try the "subtle as a train crash" approach. Remember the shaggy dog story about the guy who was new in town, walked up to an attractive woman at a bus stop and asked her if she'd like to make passionate love for hours. Of course, she just hauled off and slapped him silly, then left in a huff. A bystander, witnessing the spectacle, suggested that, around these parts, you need to be a bit more subtle. To which, the stranger replied. "Look! I'm only going to be here a few days, so I don't have time for the subtle approach. I figure nine out of ten women will slap the hell out of me for such a stunt, but I'm going to keep asking till I find the one who won't!"
CLEAN ME BEFORE YOU REAM ME. Tie enema cleansing to anal sex. Claim that anal sex, done properly, can be a wondrous turn on for both partners. With the exception of a small portion of the population, that's the truth. Claim that an enema is an intimate and sensual way to prepare for the experience. Again, you'll be telling the truth. Enemas are generally not needed to clean the rectum prior to anal sex. There are two sphincters inside. One is at the anal opening. The other is about 6 inches upstream and excludes feces from the area an average penis would reach. The exception is when a bowel movement is imminent, at which time the fecal matter will have filled this last few inches of colon. The pressure of it on the outer sphincter is the trigger that initiates the urge to go. However, it is not uncommon to find some feces in the last 6 inches. Reason enough for a good flushing.
NOTE: The woman who reported this approach noted that this is how she discovered the thrill of enemas. She was electrified by the ritual her anal-erotic lover made of laying her down, gently and thoroughly lubing her anus, spreading her cheeks lovingly, sliding the nozzle into her, checking that the water was right, and so forth. In our E-SIG enema survey, the women often mentioned the titillation of the ritual involved in an enema, so guys, don't overlook this in a headlong rush to get to the bottom line.
NOTE: To properly use this technique, you need to study the how-tos of anal sex. This is one area where, to initiate a first timer, the get-in- and-get-off approach is NOT going to work. If anyone would like instructions, we are compiling a book on the ins and outs of anal intercourse. Stay tuned.
DON'T SELL THE STEAK, SELL THE SIZZLE Promote to your sweetie how things would be if the two of you could share this important part of you. Tell your SO you know it's not fair to force them to change. When people feel pressured to change their basic personality, they are very likely to dig in their heels. Work with your SO's needs. Most women want to get into their man's heart. Most men want to get into their woman's body. Whichever turns your SO on, assure them that sharing in this area is the most efficient way in the known universe to attain their goal.
IT'S ALL IN THE POSITION Girls, you will have NO trouble getting your boyfriend or husband to give YOU an enema. If you do, consider a new boyfriend or husband as the one you've got isn't normal.
If you want to, tell him they're for health reasons. Look all embarrassed and tell him you think it will work better if HE administers the enema because you're not very good at it and you really, really do feel so much better after you've had one. Don't lie, though. Don't say anything that would preclude your telling him that you love enemas later.
Then, get him to give you the enema in the sexiest way possible. I'd suggest having him sit on the bed while you lie across his lap in spanking position.
Wear nice sexy undies or a sexy nightie. Something that you know turns him on.
While getting the enema, make sure you let him know you appreciate what he's doing. Lots of soft, contented "Ummmmm"s let him know he's doing it right.
Lots of sexy wiggling on his lap lets him know he's doing the right thing too. God gave you a cute butt. Wiggle it!
Make sure a lot of that wiggling rubs against his cock. What do you think your hips are there for, anyway? Rub!
Afterwards, make sure you fuck him. (Pardon my French) Tell him that his hands on your bottom and all that water inside you just makes you so horny you can hardly stand it. Then fuck him again. (Pardon my Anglo-Saxon) And again. Each half hour until one of you falls asleep from exhaustion.
Do this every week. Get him to associate giving you an enema with the best sex he's ever dreamed of and reinforce it each week. If he doesn't start wondering what those enemas feel like, you have a defective boyfriend/husband and you should get a new one. Suggest that you give him a little bitty tiny one. Make sure he has an erection and that you're caressing his bottom while you suggest it. If he says no, try again in a week or two.
When he says yes, make it a small one, be gentle, use warm water and a pinch of salt and make sure the sex afterwards is _very_ intense. Build up from there.
Theresa (Of Internet Newsgroup, alt.sex.enemas) Who actually followed a similar path*, except it was easier because my then boyfriend had been spanking me erotically since we were in grade school. It helps if he's already into somewhat kinky sex. The above suggestions should work on anybody who's worth being in bed with in the first place, even if they have spent entirely too much time in the Boy Scouts.
* I told him from the beginning that I liked enemas. Of course, I was lying across his lap at the time with a red bottom, so I wasn't afraid I was going to shock him or anything.
NOTE: While this was written from the feminine viewpoint as seen by one of our E-SIG ladies, the same tactic is often effective for a man. Basically, guys, if you want so much to goose her, show her how much you like it when she does you. Fair for the goose is fair for the gander. Tell her you need a sexy nurse's touch. Make sure you lie across her lap or snuggle up against her where she can feel that hardon strain against her soft flesh the whole time she fills you. Be vocal. Tell her in no uncertain terms how great it feels. Be sure to not slip into the contrived. After she does this for you, make sure she gets the hottest loving you know how to give her and that it is not the kind you want to give, but the kind she yearns to get.
THE FAT-FARM GOES FETISH This might be a great way to win a loving mate and a dedicated enemaholic in one fell poop. Find a fat person with a lovely angelic face and no cellulite. Take them under your wing and put them on a regimen of 3 high enemas a day and a reasonable diet. High enemas, those involving more than 2 quarts of water, reach beyond the colon and empty part or all of the small intestine, the area where most of the caloric content of food is extracted by the body. You can (after reading up on it, see the bibliography) also use fasting to shed some of those pounds, and fasting goes with enemas like ice cream and cones. Make sure each enema is administered as lovingly and erotically as is possible without blowing your cover (and your wad). Within a few months, look what you'll have. A beautiful and svelte lover. A mate who's addicted to submitting their gorgeous hiney to your enema ministrations, and a gut full of lust for that rear you have so lovingly been doctoring. The downside is that you'll also have the largest water bill ever sent to any single-family residence in your town.
"MAINTENANCE OF A POSITIVE ATTITUDE THROUGH THE ASSUMPTION OF A NEGATIVE RESULT" As Robert Rimmer suggests in his book, Winning Through Intimidation, be prepared for a negative result. This way, on the one hand, you won't be disappointed easily. On the other hand, you'll be positively thrilled with anything better than utter failure.
Happy Motoring
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I hope that this little primer helps you discover the health benefits and erotic secrets locked up in one of modern America's darkest closets. Remember that, with limited exceptions such as elephants, strawberries, sperm-whales and milk, only enema erotics routinely cum in quarts!