I ordered a speculum online. Cusco, size large. I wanted to get a Graves or Collin, I have experience with the latter, I can be opened so much better with that one, but it's not available in this country for non-professional purchase, it's even a wonder that I could order this one. When I went to pick it up in the post office somewhere deep inside I hoped for a less than discrete packaging with the logo of the medical equipment shop, but nope, simple little standard box. I couldn't fit it in my purse, so I opened it up and hidden in my palm in a corner I transferred the plastic wrapped speculum in there. It was heavy, but oh so easily concealed! I was disappointed a bit, but also excited. It was so long ago when I was examined. I was getting wet only from the thought. I was smugly smiling the way home knowing what was in my bag and no one suspects. Even went to the store.
When I unwrapped it at home I was still dubious about the size - so I measured it. It was matching the product description. Oh well. I soaked the device in a hyperol bath and quickly shaved myself in preparation of pictures. First insertion was awkward till I figured out the angles, trying the mechanism a good couple of times in and out, then finally I inserted my speculum fully in my vagina. I had a mirror at hand - and there way my cervix! Okay, let's try to push it in deeper. Ouch, that was the pain I missed so much. Pressure deep inside, dull pain, feeling my cervix getting between the blades digging in my soft tissue. But the damn thing wasn't long enough and wide enough for my preference and previous experiences. I masturbated with the speculum opened up inside me though. I couldn't open it fully - that would have been a 4 inch dilation. It went a bit more than halfway till I couldn't push the handle together anymore. It wasn't painful enough either, it was a position and design issue. I like pain. I take it as a challenge. I wanted my vagina to feel like it would tear at any moment and my cervix cramping from the pressure that's mercilessly opening her environment. This was just a little bit of cramps and an uncomfortable pressure because of the short blades and non-opening front part. My cervix was positioned well luckily. I made photos, videos, reinserting it multiple times, even inserting a stainless steel straw to poke around. I'm still craving more pain even though I'm spotting a bit now from the hours of taking foreign objects in and out of my vagina and agitating my cervix. The dull cramping that remains just makes me more horny. I want more. Sooo much more.