I know I've written about this before but I will explain further.... I am both mentally and physically dependent to take rather large, hot soapsuds enemas to have moderate to hard cramps and pleasure. I “need” this to achieve several good, productive bowel movements like the kind my Mom made me have. I usually take at least two to three enemas to get it all out each time I take one.
As a child and teenager in the early baby boomer years, I got many an enema. With alot of Vaseline on her fingers, Mom put some Vaseline on my rectum and perineum (so doo doo wouldn't get inside my pee hole). Then, when I was a teenager, Mom twisted the douche nozzle all around, in and out of my rectum (getting it seated) adding more Vaseline as needed. This maneuver excited me sexually and I remember at least two occasions having a climax sitting on the commode when the enema was almost over. It was then that I first became a klismo. I wanted to be full, have painful cramps and climaxes again from my Mom.
Mom paid no attention to the climax but coughed, cleared her throat and breathed hard during its duration. I kept crying out "It feels good!" She just looked away and told me to finish moving my bowels. She looked at my enema results every time before she would flush and scolded me on what I had been eating. (Mostly junk, because of the nasty smell and hard pieces.)
Now that I'm in my seventies and think back, I'm quite sure that I inherited or developed this want and need from my Mother's techniques. There was WAY too much stimulation down there as a child and teenager. My mind was ALWAYS thinking about enemas as a teenage girl. I had a very hard time staying focused in High School and barely graduated.
Do I blame her? I really don't know. I have to rationalize that it was something that just happened. Because I DO get off on hot, soapy enemas and I need EVERYTHING they provide. (I can't climax without an enema now - and it's few and far between without my husband's involvement since he's 100% disabled.) I do have a best friend who is a retired nurse and comes occasionally to give me the kind of enemas I want and need.
Enema thoughts affected my social skills and dating enjoyment, as a teenager. I wasn't turned on or pleasured by a boy - I had rather have had one of Mom's big enemas. I did go on to graduate, had a successful career, married and have children and grandchildren. Almost like a real normal person. 😊
My condition is double-sided. I have horrible IBS with worse blockages at times (I can't physically have a normal bowel movement) but I also have strong klismaphlia - like a “tic”, an urge that is constantly there but never goes away. If you met me, you would never know this condition exists….. until you said “the word”.
My face would probably be flushed, I'd turn away and most likely change the subject.
In fact, I would probably turn to jelly.